wipe_your_screen
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To You 100 Years Later by awesomecookies
Fandoms: 吸血鬼すぐ死ぬ | Kyuuketsuki Sugu Shinu | The Vampire Dies in No Time (Manga), 吸血鬼すぐ死ぬ | Kyuuketsuki Sugu Shinu | The Vampire Dies in No Time (Anime)
02 Apr 2026
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Summary
“Hold on!” Ronald slammed his palms on the desk as the realization dawned on him. “If I’m still here after retiring, then that means I never got married?!”
After all, there was no way he would continue living with a skinny vampire uncle if he had a beautiful wife and a kid. And if he did have a beautiful wife and a kid in the future, they should’ve shown up by now. Three days had passed and nothing!
This piece of information devastated him. He was probably eighty-something now. It was too late to find love. Tears pricked at the tips of his eyes.
“I’m going to die as a virgin!!!” He howled, collapsing into his hands as he covered his face.
The vampire took a long-suffering sigh before calmly walking to the living area again, and before Ronald knew it, a green leafy vegetable was once again shoved into his crying face.
“Fuck! Celery! Celery! Will you stop that?! Waaaaaah! Celeryadkdsflkgfgfl!!!!”
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Ronald travels to the future. Honestly, he wasn't impressed with what he saw. Or the time-travel AU I made years ago that only got to finishing now
Bookmarked by wipe_your_screen
18 Jun 2026
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"Fighting, mhm." Invisigal hums, stepping through the portal and glancing around the apartment, before zeroing in on the floor. "And that's why... Robert's belt is on the floor?" Her eyes then flick down to their respective hard-ons.
"Gross, didn't even notice that." Malevola adds on, vaguely disgusted.
"Fuck—" Robert snatches it off the floor and stands, pulling it through his belt loops in record time. "That was—"
"Like catfighting." Flambae says hurriedly, sliding off the counter. "You know, like when girls rip out each-other's earrings and shit. It barely even fits his scrawny ass hips anyway." Wrong thing to say to prove they weren't making out. Robert winces.
Series
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- English
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- 3,692
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- 1/1
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Bookmarked by wipe_your_screen
18 Dec 2025
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Summary
“One of these days I’m gonna burn that smug fucking look right off your face.”
Robert could reply with snark, a well-timed retort. He had it loaded.
Instead, he stares.
Like the way you're supposed to stare at the sun when it hates you, and you love it anyway.
“God, you're beautiful.”
Flambae arched a brow. “Yeah? I fucking know. Mirrors exist. But thanks.”
Or,
Robert is in love with SDN’s resident flaming asshole.
Unfortunately, the flaming asshole is the only one who doesn't know.
Bookmarked by wipe_your_screen
16 Dec 2025
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Summary
Flambae has a praise kink. Robert realizes as much sooner than later. He can't be expected to have any self control when Flambae's reactions are that cute.
Series
- Part 1 of the dreaded flambert situationship
Bookmarked by wipe_your_screen
16 Dec 2025
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Summary
“You know,” John says, breaking the silence between them. “I have another idea instead of playing cards. A better idea, in my opinion.”
Bob blinks, and then he’s leaning in, blanket slipping from his shoulders. “You do?” he asks, more than a little curious. “What is it?”
John brings an arm up, flexing it in the air. He pats at his bicep and feels a smug smile tilting up the side of his mouth. “You’re looking at the guy who punched your dad that one time. Wanna see me do it again?”
***
Usually, Yelena handles Bob when he’s in one of his moods. This time though, and on accident, John needs to pick up the slack. He just didn’t expect to come face-to-face with a little kid.
Bookmarked by wipe_your_screen
14 Oct 2025