Chapter Text
November 1799
DEMELZA
Demelza woke up that day like any other, before sunrise. Of course, by now she was used to not actually seeing the sunlight coming through the window, but she had even begun to become fond of the gray glow of London’s mornings. That day she stayed in bed a little longer. It had been so long since she felt that way, if ever she had actually felt like this at all. Ross had invited her to go to the ball on the occasion of the opening of the Parliamentary sessions, and for the first time in months, she had said yes to him.
Demelza wriggled on the bed and covered herself with the blankets. How could she be so anxious? But how could she not? These last few months since Ross had found her he had been so attentive to her. It had not been easy at the beginning. But then they had fallen in that state of infatuation, with Ross courting her like they were sweethearts. And she, slowly, had let him back into their lives and into her heart, but always refusing to give him that last token that she kept within her, no matter how gentle and loving he was with her and their son, she never let him take that last step in their reconciliation. But tonight, she had agreed to go with him to the ball. He was a Member of Parliament, therefore, he was invited to the Ball at the Court. All of London’s society would be there. She knew, she just knew what he was planning to do.
She braced her arms around her torso, looking up and only seeing the white of the sheets over her face. But in her mind she saw him, a hand on her waist, introducing her to his acquaintances as his ‘wife Demelza’. In all this time she had not let him call her that, but that night she wouldn’t protest. She happily stood loitering in bed a few minutes longer, daydreaming about the night ahead, the past behind and the whole new life in front of them. And this time they were starting this new chapter as equals. The kitchen maid that she once was that had married her master had disappeared years ago. So had the poor and lonely miner that offered her marriage out of duty and to forget. She’d never thought that they could come together like this again, that they would find each other and fall in love all over again, this time he as respectable MP and she, a prosperous workshop owner.
When she heard Jeremy jumping on the stairs she decided it was time to get up, there was still a lot of work to do in the morning. After breakfast, the governess that Ross had hired for their boy arrived for his daily lesson and Demelza made her way to the shop. The women who worked with her at the sewing workshop were more than excited when they were told they would be given chance to make a dress instead of shirts or gloves for the British army, which was generally the most requested items of clothes they manufactured. And it was not just an ordinary gown, it was for a ball, a high society ball. They'd heard that even the Prince of Wales would be there. And the dress was for an MP's wife, more important, it was for Demelza, their boss and friend, one of the owners of the shop who gave them work and a chance to provide for their families. So they had ignored Demelza's instructions for a simple and modest gown and had put their minds to it and the most refined and delicate fabric they could find and the result was a spectacular silk dress, worthy of the finest Lady.
They were all there when Demelza arrived the day of the event, none of them wanting to miss the expression on her face when she would saw it.
‘What have you done?’- Demelza said to them in astonishment. ‘I told you I didn’t want anything too fancy!’
‘Well, nothing less than fancy is going to work tonight, Miss.’- One of the seamstresses replied while the others giggled looking at Demelza surveying the dress, she hadn’t disappointed them with her reaction.
‘But it’s too much! How did you…’
The fabric, Demelza found out, was ordered from one of the ships who made trades with French goods. The brocade of the upper bodice was brought from Lisbon. Marianne had ordered it, and they all had worked on the trims and the embroidery on the hem of the skirt, delicate stitches that imitated the brocade. It was of a very pale light blue and it was perfect.
After a few hours of work, many thanks, good luck wishes and a few tears were exchanged, Demelza returned home with her dress to have tea with Jeremy and Prudie.
‘C'ptain Ross tis already here ma'am'
‘Judas! Here, help me with the pins, Prudie’– Demelza was sitting in front of her dresstable mirror, doing the plaiting on her hair. The afternoon had flown by, but she was almost ready. All there was left to do was to put on the dress. Prudie helped her to tie the laces at her back and she shivered when she imagined who would untie them later in the evening. When Demelza turned around, Prudie was drying a couple of tears that had escaped her eyelashes with her apron. ‘You've done well child’, she said with a tender voice, ‘Old Prudie is tha’ proud of ‘ee.‘ee come from far and below but tonight ‘ee would be the finest Lady of all, and ‘ee done it all by yourself, ‘ee look beautiful child.’
‘Oh, Prudie.’ Demelza surrounded her shoulders with her arms in a warm embrace. ‘You know I didn’t do it by myself. I had your help. And Hugh's and Marianne's.’
‘Whatever it tis, ‘ee deserve it. Now, let's not make Captain Ross wait much longer, he waited enough already’.
‘Prudie!’ – They both laughed.
Demelza sent Prudie downstairs to say she would be ready to go shortly. She still had one more thing to do. From under her bed, she produced a small chest where she kept all her more meaningful belongings. She had kept it there, near her all these years, but she hadn't worn it since she had left Nampara nearly six years ago. It still fitted her finger perfectly.
With a last look at the mirror she went down, she could hear the voices of Jeremy and Ross deep in conversation. She had to take a deep breath to steady herself, her heart was about to jump out of her chest. It was Jeremy who saw her first over his father's shoulder.
‘Are you ready mom?’
‘Yes, my lover.’
Ross turned to see her then, and she noticed the little spark that shone in his eyes when he looked at her. He took a brief second, or had it been hours? His gaze traveled her body, from head to toe and then rushed near her and offered his hand to helped her. In the last step he brought her hand to his lips and kissed it and he froze with her hand in front of him, his head still bowed, when he saw her wedding ring on her finger.
‘Demelza… you look beautiful, my dear.’ – He said with a grin on his face.
Demelza believed that in that moment her cheeks must be as red as her hair. She smiled back at him, but couldn’t articulate a word, especially when he brought her hand back to his mouth and kissed it again where her ring was.
They departed after a farewell from Jeremy and his promise to her mother to not stay up until late. Ross linked her arm in his while they walk through the alley to the carriage, which was too big to get to her door in the narrow street.
‘How was the session today?’- She asked once they were sitting inside and rattling through the streets of London.
‘Incredibly dull. I think I fell asleep during the last part of the King’s speech.’
‘Ross!’
‘What? It’s true. The man comes only once a year and uses the time to ramble about the most trifling subjects. Doesn’t matter that half of his people are dying from starvation, doesn’t matter that is a war right across the channel, doesn’t matter the supplies for our troops…’
‘I heard he’s not quite well… on the head.’ Demelza interjected, pointing with a finger to her own head to make the point.
‘Then God save us all… But enough of that, my love. Tonight I only want to think of you. Did I tell you that you look lovely?’
‘Yes, Ross. You did.’ She heard her voice caress his name like in the old days and he seemed to notice it too because he leaned to her and brushed her lips with his. ‘No, I mean not just today. You look lovely every day.’
Her heart was racing again, in that scarce and dark space with the occasional lights from the street lanterns illuminating their faces from time to time, she was sure he was able to hear its beating too. When their coachman managed to park the carriage in front of the entrance of the Court there was already a line of people waiting to get in, all dressed at their finest, the men with canes and galleys and the ladies with colorful bonnets and cloaks. Only a few of them paid attention to the just arrived couple at first. But all of them turned to look at them when one of the stewards opened his way through the crowd, calling and waving for ‘Captain Poldark’. The man informed Ross that a meeting was to be held during the night, set up by the Prime Minister himself, Sir William Pitt. The Prince of Wales would be there and he wanted the House of Commons to be there as well. Ross barely nodded his is agreement, Demelza knew what he should be thinking, he had planned this night with her for so many weeks, but she didn’t care much if he was to be away from her for a few moments, surely the Prince above all others knew this was a party and he would not detain the gentlemen for too long. She squeezed his hand and smiled to him, and Ross ordered the steward to take them inside immediately, which brought another few glances from the people around them as they made their way to the beginning of the line.
They were announced as ‘Captain Ross Poldark and Mistress Demelza Poldark’, and with that, the entire London’s society found out that she was Ross’s wife. As their made their way down to the ballroom, Demelza contemplated the place, the large room was decorated so opulently that was on the edge of be indecent. She had never seen anything like it before, the splendor of Tehidy or Tregothnan Houses looked like merely country cottages compared to this. She also noticed that her dress was of the latest fashion, with much of the young ladies wearing the same cut, she thanked her friends internally at that moment. Despite the luxuriousness of the place and the refinement of the people, she didn’t feel out of place, but it was not her clothes or her hair what made her feel that way. It was Ross walking by her side, with his head up and a smile on his lips. As she predicted, he searched for any familiar face to introduce her as ‘my wife Demelza’, and Demelza bowed and shook hands smiling the whole time. Everyone was curious to meet her and they were all so kind to her. She would have to ask Ross what had he told them about her this whole time.
As the evening went on, Ross and Demelza danced a couple of pieces, a minuet and the gavotte, but then retired to a corner, Ross arguing a pain in his ankle but she knew he had noticed a few men looking at her, two of them even approached her and asked for a dance. But she refused them and stay happily with Ross, who after only a glass of brandy was unusually talkative and light headed and he spent a good part of an hour pointing people to her and explaining who they were and why they were worthy of his total contempt.
Shortly after Ross was summoned to the meeting she saw him for the first time. Making his way with the gentlemen to see the Prime Minister was George Warleggan. Demelza recognized the sound of his voice first and when she looked at him she noticed that he was very changed. Six years had not come with grace for George. He was much more robust, especially around the waist, with many wrinkles under his eyes. And the wig, Demelza suspected, hid more than many white hairs. She hoped that his presence would not shift Ross’ mood, and for that she also worked hard refusing the men that seeing her alone, asked more vigorously for her attention. There was one in particular that was the most insisting, and by chance happened to be there the moment dinner was announced served. As he offered his hand, Demelza looked around for Ross, but he was nowhere to be seen. Everyone was on their way to the dining room so she figured that Ross would most likely go to find her there.
The man, as he cheerfully said, was Monk Adderley, MP. ‘Shouldn’t you be at the meeting as well?’- she asked him distracted, still searching for Ross. ‘Only torys are allowed, ma’am.’
‘Oh, and you are not one of them?’
‘No, not of that kind anyway.’
The lustful look he gave her made her tremble and she tried to make excuses to stay in the ballroom but realized that if she stood there, soon they would be alone. So she placed her hand on his elbow, avoiding skin contact, and let him guide her to the table.
Luckily for Demelza, the room was busting with people. There were four long tables set across the room and one more ahead of them and some steps above, for the Prince of Wales, the Prime Minister and their retinue. Monk sat next to Demelza and tried to engage her in conversation but the talk around them was loud. The women to her other side and in front of her began to praise her gown and inquire her about the rare brocade and the dress confection, so Adderley didn't have much choice than to cease in his endeavor. She had noticed that on the first table in front of the royal one there were several empty seats, ‘They're for the most relevant Members of Parliament and their wives.’-the woman next to her whispered in her ear. Minutes later and little by little, the men who had been in the meeting made their way to the dining room. As she had been told, they took their place in the first table, some of them searched the room for their partners and waved for their wives to go and join them, others approached to where their dates were sitting and offered their arms to guide them to their new seats. A few came across the doors with their women by their side. Demelza realized that some of the ladies had waited for their husbands in the ballroom.
She saw Ross look back as he was about to enter and seemed to wait for someone. When he began to move again Elizabeth was at his side. Demelza dropped the fork she was holding on her plate, she felt the air evaporate from her lungs. ‘Are you alright my dear? You’re gone white!’ She heard the woman say. Monk Adderley was paying no attention to her anymore. She nodded and drank some water but she never lost sight of them while they made their way to the table.
Elizabeth was talking to Ross and he was attentively listening. Unlike her husband, the years had not passed at all for Elizabeth, she was still as beautiful as the day she met her at The Red Lion a lifetime ago. And yet, apparently, held the same magnetism for Ross as that day. No matter everything that they had went through, no matter how miserable their lives had been because of it, she could still see them holding on to the possibility of a young lovers life that had not be. When they sat next to each other Ross was the one who was talking. Demelza was half expecting that he turned his head and look for her, but he was too invested in whatever they might be saying.
Through her mind a rush of thoughts reminded her of the last few months, since the moment he found her, his plea for her forgiveness and hers for his. The angry words and the tender kisses and always, always the same motto ‘Elizabeth means nothing to me’, ‘I was never happy with her, I’ve always wanted you.’ And then, here they were, again in the same plight as always, as if everything that all three of them had lived through in the last six years had meant nothing. Instinctively, Demelza searched for George but he was nowhere to be seen. Suddenly she wanted for him to come, for him to see his wife flirting with his greatest enemy and for him to make a scandal in front of the Prince and the Prime Minister. But he hadn’t come back yet and she didn’t want to belittle herself to be the one who made the fuss. Through the crowd she saw Ross smile to Elizabeth and she placed her hand in his and he brought it to his lips and kissed it.
‘Child? You don’t look alright at all.’
‘I’m fine, I just need to get some air.’
Monk Adderley stood up to go with her, but she pushed him as she went past him. She went out without her cloak, the ring no longer on her finger and the same old feeling of wildness and disappointment that had led her to leave him in the first place again within her.