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1. Is that a Snake in Your Trousers or are You Happy to See Me? by lyraonyx

   Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling  

   • Explicit
   • No Archive Warnings Apply
   • M/M
   • Complete Work

   16 Jul 2019

   Tags

   • No Archive Warnings Apply
   • Harry Potter/Severus Snape
   • Crack
   • Humor
   • Parselmouth!Severus
   • Dom!Severus
   • Bratty Sub!Harry
   • Mild BDSM
   • M-Preg... sort of
   • intersex Harry
   • potions gone wrong
   • Snark
   • Glorious snark
   • Harry talks to his penis
   • Slash
   • Weird Plot Shit
   • Snake Voyeurism

   Summary

   While working as a detective for the aurors’ Biomagical Hazards department, Harry has learned the value of the phrase: ‘if you hear hoofbeats in a magical forest, it’s probably a centaur, not a horse.’ It’s just Harry’s luck that when he comes down with a mysterious ailment while on the job, it’s not even a centaur, but a bloody snake. In a particularly embarrassing place. And Snape is the only one who might be able to help.

   And now for something completely different. Something like a seriously weird, humorous oneshot. This is 100% crackfic, people, so be prepared for a wild ride.

   Language:

   English

   Words:

   20,007

   Chapters:

   1/1

   Comments:

   111

   Kudos:

   1,136

   Bookmarks:

   226

   Hits:

   15,820