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"You were not made for suffering, Don Ibarra. You can be happy elsewhere."
He doesn't know what to say to that. Elias looks blank, his face completely devoid of emotion. Crisostomo wonders if he even cares that he'll be saying goodbye to his...friend, lover, partner, whatever they are.
He knows that a life without Elias is dull and lonely, as even just a few days of not speaking to him made Crisostomo an emotional wreck. He honestly has no idea how he had lived without the mysterious boatman in his life. Elias is like a tornado, destructive and violent, but he brings life. He completely turned Crisostomo's life around, yet he can't help but be so drawn to Elias-his mystery, his brokenness, everything.
"But...but I can't be happy without you," he whispers, and he realizes that this is the truth. Even when his life had crumbled to pieces, just having Elias there comforted him. It still does, and he can't bear the thought of being without his beloved.
Elias' gaze hardens. "I cannot go with you."
He says it so forcefully that Crisostomo hears I do not want to go with you instead of I cannot go with you. He steps back, feeling his eyes water.
"Al-alright, I understand." He's hurt, he's so hurt and he can't help the tear that slides down his cheek. He wipes it off as fast as possible because he doesn't want Elias to pity him. If Elias wants to stay, he can stay. He is a grown man, and he has his own decisions.
"No, Crisostomo, I-" he cuts himself off, thinking of something to say. "I'm not entirely sure you would want someone like me in your life. I will drag you down. You're...you're a perfect, amazing man and I don't deserve someone like you. You don't need me."
"No!" he shouts immediately, tears gone. "No. I need you. Elias, I need you in my life. I'm just a man, and I've made mistakes. I'm not perfect, much less amazing and you shouldn't think so little of yourself. You could never drag me down."
Elias tenses, not saying anything. So he continues.
"Come away with me." he says quietly. "Please."
He looks Elias in the eye. There is so much hesitance and uncertainty in them, and Crisostomo knows that something inside the boatman is screaming at him to say no, because that is how Elias is and always will be.
Elias opens his mouth. Then closes it.
He nods quietly.
Relief and happiness flood through Crisostomo, but he still has to make sure. Elias could back out in the last minute, he looks so unsure.
"Promise me you'll go with me." he says firmly.
"I...I promise," Elias murmurs, reaching for Crisostomo's hand like he needs something to reassure himself that this is the right choice.
Instead, Crisostomo kisses him, tears flowing down his face again. It is incredibly selfish if him to force Elias to do something he doesn't want to do, but right now he doesn't care.
It is just him and Elias and the rest of the world is gone.
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They're coming. Fuck, Elias looks pale as he paddles as fast as he can and Crisostomo bites his lip. Oh God, what the hell are they going to do?
"You know how to handle a boat, yes?" Elias asked.
"Of course, why?"
"We're lost unless I jump out and lead them away. They will chase after me, but I am good at swimming. I'll lead them away from you, so try to save yourself."
He cannot possibly be serious. No, Elias is going to be killed. He cannot be killed, not when he has made a promise!
"No, stay!" Crisostomo shouts. He grabs Elias' ankle, a desperate attempt to keep him here. He wishes he was standing, so he could just pull him away from the water. "We'll sell our lives dearly!"
"It is useless," he hisses, tugging his foot away. "They have rifles, whilst we are unarmed. They will pick us off like birds."
There is then the sound of a gunshot and hot lead hits the water. Oh God. No, no, no, they're shooting. This is going to make Elias leave, and what if they kill him? He is not going to be able to live without Elias, he needs him!
"See? Meet me on Christmas Eve at your grandfather's grave. Save yourself." he says, placing the paddle in the boat.
"No, Elias! What about you?"
"God has delivered me from greater dangers," he whispers, removing his shirt. It is shot away by a bullet and Crisostomo wants to scream at him to stay. But there is no changing Elias' mind. He can tell from just looking at his face.
Elias bends down and kisses him as quickly and urgently as he can. Then he rises up to jump out of the boat.
Crisostomo shouts one more thing. "You promised!"
He is not sure if Elias hears him as he dives out of their tiny boat and kicks it farther away. He hears many gunshots, but he cannot see a thing and tears sting his eyes as he desperately prays for Elias' safety.
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He is running. He is running as fast as he can because he needs to see if Elias is alright. Two days without food or water must be terrible on the man, so he is carrying some. They will be leaving soon, so Elias needs his strength.
He is not scared. Elias made a promise, and Elias keeps his promises. He promised Crisostomo that he would protect him, and he has, even when he found out that it was Crisostomo's ancestor that ruined the life of his entire family.
He is close. He sees a shadow that can only be Elias leaning against a tree. He runs faster.
He stops when Elias' body comes into full view. There is blood. There is so much blood surrounding him and Crisostomo looks on with horror as Elias' eyes flutter open.
He is given a very, very weak grin.
"Crisostomo," Elias whispers, smile getting wider as Crisostomo rushes over to him, tears streaming down his cheeks.
"Oh my God, Elias, I-" he begins to sob, but he is cut off by a dirty finger to his lips.
"Shh, don't say anything, just...just stay with me. Please."
Crisostomo pulls Elias' head to his lap, an action they are both familiar with. Elias smiles again, no doubt thinking of the lazy afternoons and slow, languid kisses they had shared once. Crisostomo cannot think of anything but the fact that there is a bloody piece of fabric tied around Elias.
"I'm...I'm so sorry I couldn't keep my promise," Elias sighs quietly, reaching up to hold Crisostomo's face in his hand.
Crisostomo doesn't say anything, he just sobs harder. He is going to have to live without Elias. Just when he had been promised a life abroad with Elias, Elias gets wounded. God, life is so unfair.
"Crisostomo, I want to see you smile. Stop crying."
He looks at Elias, who has pain and love and sadness and apology and desperation shining in his eyes. So he smiles as best as he can. It doesn't feel very sincere.
"Kiss me," Elias says.
So he does.
The kiss is slow and sweet, like the ones they shared in the light of the sinking sun. Elias clutches Crisostomo's hand like it is his lifeline, like it is the only thing keeping him here.
"Never forget me," he murmurs against Crisostomo's lips.
"Never," Crisostomo sobs. How could he ever forget tanned skin, strong arms, and sad yet beautiful eyes? Every memory of the mysterious boatman who has turned out to be one of the most important people in his life is burned into his brain. He cannot forget Elias. He will not forget Elias.
"I love you so much," Elias sobs. Crisostomo is astonished to find tears slipping down his face. "I'm so sorry I have to leave you."
They cry together, clutching each other desperately. Soon, Elias' sobs are inaudible and it is just Crisostomo crying and holding onto Elias. The boatman is limp against him.
A life without Elias is no life at all. But he has to keep going. There is still so much to do.