Work Text:
WineAunt has been renamed to Momnight by HesAStoat
Blockhead: so the super moves was what let them all pass, I feel
Yamadad: pretty sure it was the pep talk I gave them
BloodBag: still can’t believe we had every single first year pass the provisional license exam
BloodBag: even Bakugo passed
BloodBag: I mean, it was close, but he still passed
Dadzawa: both mentoss and my husband are incorrect, y’all didn’t have shit to do with them passing
Momnight: are you saying that it was all you?
Dadzawa: absolutely not, it was 10000% a horrifying combination of Izuku, Hitoshi, Neito, and Mei
LabSafety101: she’s surprisingly subdued rn, I actually convinced her to take a nap
Dadzawa: that’s because she worked for 72 hours straight with minimal caffeine
LabSafety101: hey chiyo
GrannyChiyo: if she’s already asleep I can’t do anything
LabSafety101: yeah but can you make sure she’s not about to die in her sleep
Yamadad: the boys made sure she ate, dw
LabSafety101: was it healthy?
Yamadad: idk but it was food!
GrannyChiyo: is she in the dorms or the lab
LabSafety101: she’s on a beanbag chair in the labs
GrannyChiyo: of course she is
GrannyChiyo: I’ll be there in a moment
HesAStoat: Very proud of our first years! (:
Dadzawa: alright that's the second time you’ve done that, why
HesAStoat: done what (:
Dadzawa: do we need to get an exorcist
Momnight: better safe than sorry
HesAStoat: ah, you mean the revered smiley face!
HesAStoat: yes I’m testing something! (:
UncleGun: how fast it takes us to shit our pants?
HesAStoat: (:
Ghostbusters: how much money do I have to pay you to stop
HesAStoat: I pay you? (:
Ghostbusters: how much money do I have to pay you to stop
UncleGun: pretty sure we’ll all chip in, its for a good cause
SmallMight: Izuku is asking to be introduced to Nighteye and I don’t know what to do
Dadzawa: seems simple enough to me, just introduce him to nighteye
SmallMight: I haven’t spoken to the man in years?
Dadzawa: ok, get your head out of the sand and talk to nighteye again, then introduce Izuku to nighteye
Yamadad: yeah feels cut and dry to me
SmallMight: but… it’s awkward
Momnight: yagi just talk to your ex, we all have to do it eventually
SmallMight: WHAET
SmallMight: MIRAI IS NOT MY EX
Momnight: oh, then there’s no reason for this to be awkward, just go “ey yo nighteye, what’s good, have you met this kid? Small, green, smart, honestly one of the best kids I’ve ever met, how do you feel about signing him on for work studies?”
Dadzawa: a bit more professional than that, hopefully, but that’s the general idea, yes
SmallMight: I can’t do that ;-;
Yamadad: oh nice use of the emoticon, yagi
SmallMight: thank you
SmallMight: anyway the last time we talked he told me I was going to die in 7 years if I didn’t retire and I told him I wasn’t going to do that
SmallMight: we haven’t really talked since, it’s hard to get over that…
Dadzawa: so what are you going to do, because if you tell izuku no on the basis of “it’s awkward” then I might just demote you again
Momnight: wait so he pulled a Ring on you and then when you didn’t retire you told no one and stopped talking to him?
Momnight: why is this the first time I’m hearing of this, are you actually dying
SmallMight: I mean, I didn’t die at Kamino and it’s been about 7 years
UncleGun: clever avoidance of aizawa’s question, but yeah, what are you gonna do
SmallMight: well, Mirio works with Sir
Ghostbusters: dude just call him, this is embarrassing
SPAAACE: all might really, just call the guy, I’m sure you’d make up just fine, I mean, you’re retired now, right?
SmallMight: it’s not that simple
GrannyChiyo: it really is
I Hunger: it kind of, really is?
Yamadad: yagi are you in the teacher’s lounge
SmallMight: yes why
SmallMight: yamada?
Yamadad: they are now on the phone
Momnight: that was the best thing ive ever seen lmfao
Momnight: for those of us not currently in the staff room, zashi came up to yagi and just yoinked his phone
Momnight: apparently yagi still had nighteye’s contact saved, or maybe zashi came prepared with the number, because within 4 seconds the phone was ringing, and before yagi could cancel the call, nighteye picked up lmao
Momnight: so now we get to witness this very awkward conversation
Momnight: I don’t think izuku is going to be brought up at all, but we just watched the rekindling of an old flame, people
SmallMight: again, we never dated
Momnight: right, my bad
Momnight: but hey, you’re totally single, and I don’t know a single person interested in Nighteye so I think you have a decent shot if you want to go for it now!
UncleGun: maybe this is not the best way to get over his embarrassment
SmallMight: it isn’t
HesAStoat: Mirio and Izuku are both on their way to the office, by the way (:
SmallMight: wait why
HesAStoat: so you can tell them (:
SmallMight: I’m emotionally exhausted from that one 30 second phone call and you want me to talk to students???
Dadzawa: that’s how you know you’re a real teacher. You can either be like me and care about nothing, or you can be like zashi and care about everything, but you should probably decide in the next 60 seconds before the students arrive
SmallMight: fuck
Blockhead: yagi just swore????
Ghostbusters: now that’s illegal
SPAAACE: im shook ;-;
UncleGun: I'm sobbing, that's not possible, I don't understand???
Dadzawa: I see he picked option three: care about just enough to give you a nervous breakdown and resort to swearing
Dadzawa: I’m so proud
Yamadad: I can’t believe the symbol of peace swore
Momnight: he’s retired, he doesn’t need to be kid friendly anymore
Yamadad: he teaches children?
Momnight: are you saying you’ve never sworn around the kids
Dadzawa: actually he hasn’t he just comes up with ludicrous substitutes
Dadzawa: I do enough swearing for both of us
Yamadad: the kids take after him :(
Dadzawa: they came like that
Momnight: yeah Neito looked mortified the first time he swore around me and I stared him dead in the eye and cussed out his foster parents for a good 30 seconds
Momnight: and then we got ice cream and watched a drama, it was good
UncleGun: that’s incredible
UncleGun: I know for a fact that basically every kid in school at least knows half the common swear words
UncleGun: but it’s also really fun to say “dagnabbit”
Ghostbusters: honestly if you’re going to not-swear, you gotta use jokes and or puns
Ghosbusters: preferably both
Blockhead: do you have examples
Ghostbusters: I mean it’s usually situational but let me think
Ghostbusters: damn now I’m on the spot, I’ll point it out later when I notice it next
Blockhead: you have failed me one too many times, Dennis
Ghostbusters: nooooo! I promise, I-I can do it! I swear!
Blockhead: you had your chance. Now perish.
Ghostbusters: noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo blerg
SPAAACE: he was so young :’(
HesAStoat: a true tragedy ):
Ghostbusters: luckily I’ve always been a ghost so death does jackshit
Ghostbusters: can’t die if you’re already dead
SPAAACE: I mean there are probably ways
SPAAACE: I bet I could kill a ghost
Ghostbusters: I will NOT be helping you test that, thanks
SPAAACE: just make me a clone its fine
Ghostbusters: clones are people too!
Dadzawa: they objectively aren’t
Yamadad: important question that ecto can’t answer but everyone else can and also should
Yamadad: would you fuck your clone?
Ghostbusters: was gonna be sad that I couldn’t answer but now I am glad I’m exempt.
Momnight: I would absolutely fuck my clone
UncleGun: seeing as I wouldn’t fuck anyone, no thanks
SPAAACE: not sure how that would work, pretty sure we’d just combine into one person
Blockhead: that’s so weird
Yamadad: I think I’d try it!
Dadzawa: I’m going to pass
SPAAACE: wait, aizawa’s clone, if they both activated erasure at the same time, what would happen
Dadzawa: fucking nothing
Momnight: have you tested it tho because if not I have a kid with a copy quirk
Dadzawa: I know that’s how I know
Dadzawa: plus getting the timing down is almost impossible. If I activate first, I erase the copy, but if he goes first, it erases my quirk, and then that kills his connection for some reason, until it cancels the copy he has, I get my quirk back, and then the first scenario happens
UncleGun: you guys actually tested it?
Yamadad: Izuku wanted to know
UncleGun: valid
SmallMight: Izuku will be going with Mirio to meet Mirai
Dadzawa: good, time to send an email
Yamadad: sho ffs
Dadzawa: what
Yamadad: don’t threaten nighteye???
Dadzawa: What gave you the impression that I was about to send a threatening email to Sir Nighteye?
Yamadad: the capitalization and punctuation on that last sentence, for one
Dadzawa: I don’t know what you mean.
Yamadad: you know that if you threaten nighteye into taking izuku then he’s less likely to accept him for work studies, right
Momnight: yeah that’s pretty big nepotism
UncleGun: I trust the tiny grape to lure nighteye to the dark side
SPAAACE: the dark side?
UncleGun: I mean are you gonna call it the light side?
SPAAACE: nah
UncleGun: exactly lmao
Class 1-AYYYYYYYYY
RockSolid: so who else is going on work studies? I know Yaomomo and I are with Fatgum
KingIzu: I’m going to visit Sir Nighteye with Mirio tomorrow!
LifeIsPain: I shall be with Hawks, like for my internship.
Kirby: Tsu and I are with Ryukyu and Nejire! It’s gonna be so much fun!
datBoi: I am looking forward to it :P
PrinceToshi: I think dad might take me if he does something cool, idk
PikaCHU: ugh, this is gonna be so rough! You guys get to go out and be cool!
CopyCat: oh hush, the rest of us will have plenty to do, and work study people have to make up class
Jacked: aren’t you doing something with your ~mom~
CopyCat: if by something you mean binging that new drama on netflix, then yes
Jacked: oh is Momnight not doing anything for work studies?
KingIzu: midnight doesn’t usually do work studies! Most of the staff don't, actually, dad being an exception for hitoshi because there are few underground heroes who do work studies and toshi has already been working with dad
RockSolid: really hyped for this! Gonna get so much experience!
PrinceToshi: I mean in a perfect world our experience would be “better at patrolling” and that’s it, but knowing izu, we’re probably going to take down a criminal organization or something
KingIzu: that’s ridiculous, the only criminal organization is the league and there’s no way dad would let us on any of the teams investigating the league
IcyHot: that we know of
KingIzu: wait, what?
IcyHot the only criminal organization that we know of
IcyHot: your brother is correct, you attract trouble. It is very concerning. I am tempted to try and find a work study just to keep an eye on you.
KingIzu: sho, I don’t attract trouble!
Jacked: x to doubt
Kirby: x to doubt
MOMo: x to doubt
CopyCat: x to doubt
PrinceToshi: x to doubt
PikaCHU: x to doubt
LSD: x to doubt
Spoderman: x to doubt
KingIzu: guys
LifeIsPain: x to doubt
BreadIsPain: x to doubt
Octodad: x to doubt
RockSolid sorry izu, but
RockSolid: x to doubt
NYOOM: x to doubt
KingIzu: iida??? Even you?
NYOOM: you do somehow get in more situations than any of the rest of us…
JazzHands: yeah, honestly, x to doubt
datBoi: kero, if we did a chart of how many villain attacks we have all been involved in, you would probably have more than all of us combined
datBoi: x to doubt, kero
SnowWhite: ^^;
KingIzu: I can’t believe you guys
IcyHot: I actually have a theory
KingIzu: please no
IcyHot: either you were hit with a quirk that makes you a villain magnet, or you actually have a quirk that does the same thing
KingIzu: pretty sure we’ve been over the no quirk thing
MOMo: but is it possible you were hit with a quirk such as that in your youth?
KingIzu: I’m pretty sure a quirk like that doesn’t exist!!
KingIzu: and no, I was only hit with the quirks of my classmates and that one sludge villain, I’m fine
PrinceToshi: “fine”
KingIzu: actually!
KingIzu: speaking of!
KingIzu: kacchan actually apologized, like, with words
Jacked: holy shit, seriously?
KingIzu: yeah, it was after the exams, he just came up out of the blue all gruff, like, “We need to talk”
PrinceToshi: I did threaten to make him defenestrate but izu told me he could probably throw him out a window himself if it came to it
IcyHot: this is true
KingIzu: so anyway he gave me a full out apology? Like, the words “I’m sorry” actually came out of his mouth
Kirby: that’s crazy, he must have really toned things down in the past half a year
NYOOM: I am glad our fellow student saw the error of his ways and apologized!
LSD: that’s great! He’s not off the hook yet, of course, but now we no longer have to attack him on sight
KingIzu: thank you for not attacking him on sight -_-
PrinceToshi: of course, we aren’t barbarians
CopyCat: speak for yourself, I’m still ready to hamstring him
RockSolid: that’s pretty manly of him! There’s nothing more manly than knowing when you’re wrong :D
MOMo: well, it’s been a long day, and work studies will start soon, so perhaps it is best for us to not be texting at all hours of the night, hmm?
Jacked: yes, your majesty
BreadIsPain: oui~!
KingIzu: gn guys!