Chapter Text
The problem with living in a forest (though, not the only one of course), is that everything tends to look the same. One wrong turn coming home from the rabbit traps and Jackie and Shauna find themselves utterly lost. “Fuck, we have to like, put some signs up or something,” Jackie says as they pace through the forest, probably getting further and further away from the cabin.
“Right,” Shauna says, “because we can just go to the nearest print shop and make up some nice little signs pointing our way home.”
Jackie rolls her eyes, Shauna always gets a little sarcastic when she’s angry and just a bit nervous. “You know what I mean,” Jackie says, “we could just wrap sweatshirts we don’t need around trees so we never get lost or something.”
“Well too late now,” Shauna says, seemingly giving up, settling down in the middle of a clearing Jackie is certain she doesn’t recognize.
She follows Shauna’s lead, sitting down beside her in the plush grass, basking in the thankfully warm summer sun. It’s their second summer now, and while the winter was hard, they’d made it through relatively unscathed, and mostly sane. Jackie appreciates the warmth now, but she hates that Shauna refuses to sleep close to her because apparently, she makes her way too hot. Every season has it’s pluses and minuses, and Jackie thinks if they have to live out here another winter, she’s not going to take snuggling with Shauna for granted. “Well, when we get home we can suggest it to the other girls,” Jackie says, setting her hands behind her, closing her eyes.
“If we get back,” Shauna says, her voice ominous.
She doesn’t sound serious, she sounds sarcastic and angry, but still, it has Jackie snapping her eyes right back open. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” she says, looking at Shauna with widening eyes.
“Well, we’ve been looking for the cabin for at least an hour now Jackie, maybe we’ll just have to learn to fend for ourselves,” Shauna says.
“You’re so fucked up,” Jackie says, shoving her playfully.
“Perhaps, but you better start preparing for life as feral forest girls,” Shauna teases back.
“I think we’ve already got that one down,” Jackie retorts.
“Yeah but now we’re going to have to fend for ourselves, no shelter, no blankets, no Travis to eat if we get really hungry,” Shauna jokes.
“Oh dear, we may really end up going insane,” she agrees, tucking closer to Shauna.
“Yup, we might just,” Shauna says, her eyes sliding shut as she enjoys the sun just like Jackie had moments ago.
They’re silent for a moment, a comfortable quiet silence Jackie can only enjoy with Shauna. Instead of closing her eyes this time, she watches Shauna with a reverent sense of awe. She looks so peaceful, her head thrown back in the sun, her dark hair shimmering in the golden light. She looks so gorgeous, like the picture of beauty, of absolute radiance. Jackie’s ever growing feelings for Shauna click deeper in her heart, feeling almost overwhelmingly strong as she stares mindlessly. She can’t hold her tongue for one moment longer.
“Listen, I have something to tell you, before we die out here,” Jackie says, her voice shaking.
“Jackie,” Shauna says, opening her eyes, dropping her hands onto Jackie’s, “we’re not going to die out here.”
“Well you’re the one who said we were lost for good!” she fights back, momentarily forgetting her train of thought.
“Yeah but I was kidding and there’s no way we won’t get found before we starve to death, and it’s not like we’re going to die of exposure on a gorgeous July day,” Shauna says, like it’s obvious.
Jackie rolls her eyes once more. Shauna is so pretentious sometimes. “I’ve seen X-Files Shauna, episode one. Those kids only a little older than us were dying of exposure in the forest in the middle of July.
Shauna shakes her head, a ridiculous smile on her face, a sweet laugh on her tongue. “Jackie, they were being abducted by aliens. ”
“You can’t prove that, even Agent Mulder can’t,” Jackie argues, continuing before Shauna can fight back, “anyways. Regardless of if we die tonight of exposure, I have something I need to tell you, I don’t want to wait any longer.”
“Did you sleep with my boyfriend?” Shauna asks, clearly trying to diffuse the tension.
“No,” she says, “I don’t really know how to tell you this, but the more time we spend out here, and the more I think about how I felt at home, I was beginning to wonder if…”
Jackie takes a deep breath. The words are harder to find than she could ever imagine. If Shauna didn’t feel the same way, the feeling of loss Jackie would be faced with is immense. “I think my feelings for you are a little more than platonic,” she says way too fast, before forcing herself to slow down, “I think… I think I’m in love with you, like really, romantically in love with you.”
Shauna looks at her, her jaw dropping, her eyes widening. “Really?” Shauna says, the emotion in her voice, swimming in her eyes one that Jackie has no idea how to detect. It’s a mystery, and she’s not sure if her heart should sink, or swim, emerging from the water with the happiest realization of mutual love.
“Yes,” Jackie says, with confidence, “I’m in love with you, and if you don’t feel the same way, that’s okay, but I needed you to know, in case we die out here.”
“We’re not going to die out here,” Shauna says, leaning into her, her face mere inches from Jackie’s now.
“Oh yeah?” Jackie says, unsure of what’s happening right now.
“Yeah,” Shauna says, “I’m not going to die one day after getting a girlfriend.”
Jackie laughs out loud.
“Oh, so you just got a girlfriend?” she teases.
“Yeah, I think when your best friend and the girl you’ve been in love with since you were like six tells her she loves you, you kinda become her girlfriend,” Shauna says.
“Okay, I see where you’re coming from with that logic, I’m not opposed to it at all ,” she says, inching closer, “but do you think you could kiss? Just to you know… seal the deal?”
“I think I could agree to that,” Shauna says, and she presses their lips together.
It may be a first kiss, but the way Jackie’s body reacts makes her feel like she’s been doing this her entire life. Shauna’s kisses feel familiar, not because they’re like anything she’s ever experienced before (god, Jeff wishes he was this good), it’s just that it feels like she’s meant to be doing this. Like memory of a life before, one where she kissed Shauna time and time again. It feels likely a life like that exists, after feeling this kiss. There’s no way there’s any life, universe, whatever, where they don’t end up here, lying in the grass, lost in some forest in Canada, kissing. It was probably written in the stars.
They kiss and kiss and kiss, laughing and teasing each other and kissing some more, and Jackie pretty much fucking forgets the entire world around her. She’s so lost in Shauna she doesn’t bother to remember they’re quite literally, actually lost. It doesn’t seem that important, compared to this, until…
“Oh gross,” Nat’s voice calls out.
They spring apart, turning to the voices, finally noticing Tai, Van and Nat standing at the edge of the clearing. “Thank fuck,” Van says, “we’ve been looking for you everywhere. We were worried .”
“And you’re out here, making out,” Taissa says, rolling her eyes. “Of fucking course.”
“I know it’s super gross, but be nice okay?” Van says, looking between Tai and Nat, who both roll their eyes but reluctantly nod, “happy for you both and all that, but can we go home now? It’s almost dinner time and we were half convinced you were eaten by a bear.”
They both nod, and Shauna stands, reaching a hand out to help Jackie up. When she’s standing, she doesn’t let go of Shauna’s hand. She’d always been a bit touchy with Shauna, but now, she doesn’t think she’ll ever be able to let go of her girlfriend. The touch rejuvenates her, sends her blood running through her veins, keeps her heart pumping.
As they walk back to the cabin, (admittedly not as far as they had thought it was), they’re somehow still in their own little world. They bump shoulders, smile bright giddy little smiles at each other, and laugh at their own jokes like they’re the funniest things they’ve ever heard. Nat mimes vomiting, and Tai mimes shooting herself in the head, but Jackie couldn’t care less.
They’re safe now, not lost, not going to die of exposure in the Canadian wilderness, and she finally got to kiss Shauna. All and all, not a bad day.