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Spock watched Kirk as he beamed in on the transporter – The captain had just returned from a diplomatic mission intending to establish mining rights on the planet of the Ameviens, a species known for their extremely quick temper and very physical welcoming ceremonies.
“Mr Spock think yourself lucky that you weren’t required down on that planet,” he let out a breath as he stepped off of the transporter, dusting the glitter off his uniform as he did so.
“Am I to assume it went well captain?” Spock said as he handed Kirk a pad with the results of his recent studies of Zeniva VII, a planet they were considering for shore leave nearby in the Vorach system. “It went good enough but I don’t think I’ve ever had more hugs in my life.”
“The Ameviens are a very physical species Captain, I believe you were briefed on that before beaming down?” Kirk muttered something unintelligible under his breath and chuckled at the eyebrow raised in return.
“We were but usually hugs are something that are used to comfort people or as a celebration for something, most humans don’t express their anger by throwing their arms around someone and squeezing as hard as they can,” he rubbed at his sides as he talked.
“Vulcans do not hug each other as you humans do, however the Ameviens are a very emotive species so it is to be expected that they express their emotions through touch.” Kirks eyes widened as he spoke, “Spock you didn’t get hugged when you were little?”
“On Vulcan, hugging someone is seen as a gross display of emotions – after you reach a certain age, Vulcans simply do not require it.”
“Well Mr Spock, if you ever need a hug anyway you can always come to me.” He laughed as he spoke and stepped into the turbo lift. Spock lifted an eyebrow but said nothing else as they made their way to the Bridge.
***
He had completely forgot about the captains statement until he was in his lab examining one of the recent soil samples from Zeniva VII, and he remembered his mother going to hug him when he was seven after he had come out of the Vulcan Learning Centre, her face when he had responded with that it was unbecoming of a Vulcan had been understanding as she took his hand and walked him back home.
He remembered standing next to Sarek as his mother set of for her annual trip to earth, wanting to ask for a hug but knowing he couldn’t because Father had told him it was a useless display of sentiment and feeling.
Spock sat up from his slouched position on his chair and wondered if the captain had meant his previous statement before silencing that foolish thought.
***
The next time Spock caught himself thinking about it was when he was in his quarters preparing for his usual nightly meditation. He had wondered if kirk would be warm like his mother had been – it was a silly question considering they were both human, and so had the same body temperature.
Would it be a loose embrace? Or would it be like the way his mother would squeeze her arms around Spock and pull him so close he could feel her chest rising with each breath she took.
He found that he did not think he would mind either one if it was from Jim, but he quickly swept that thought from his mind and assumed his evening meditation. Except he couldn’t.
Every time he tried to get into the right mind space for it, he found his thoughts drifting back to the idea of hugging Jim. Where he would place his hands, what he would smell like, how would it feel?
The last time he’d hugged someone was while he was at the academy – would it feel different?
Spock slowly stood to his full height, letting his meditation robes drift around him before deciding he would go and ask Jim now – as an experiment of course. He would ask for a quick hug to appease his thoughts and then he would meditate and go to sleep.
It was the logical thing to do.
As he stood outside Kirks door, he wondered if his captain was already asleep, however as soon as he made to go back to his quarters, wondering how he had come to such an illogical line of thinking, he heard the doors swoosh open behind him.
“Mr Spock? Missing my company that much?” Spock noted that his choice of clothing was a simple vest and pair of silken loose pants and that his hair was damp – he must have been in the shower before Spock had come to the door.
“Captain, May I come in?”
The captains eyebrows creased as he waved him inside and asked him if he wanted any tea, “No, thank you, captain, I was wondering if you could assist me in some way.”
“How many times do I have to say it’s Jim off duty?” He spoke jovially while asking Spock what he could help him with.
“Ca- Jim, I would like to ask if I could have a.. ‘hug’” He felt his cheeks warming and quickly dampened it down. “A hug?” His eyebrows rose as he stopped half heartedly drying his hair with a small hand towel.
“You want a hug?” Spock averted his eyes slightly before coming to focus on his captain once again, “Of course, if you are opposed to it captain, I can leave-“
“I’m not opposed to it,” He smiled, “Of course you can have a hug.” He chuckled as he spoke and Spock watched him come closer until he was able to smell the faint scent of cedar and sandalwood.
He reached out until his arms were wrapped securely around Spock’s back and pulled him closer until his head rested in the crook of Spock’s neck.
The Vulcan stood tense as Kirk positioned his arms around his back and Spock could feel him smiling against his skin.
His arms were lightly shaking as he put them around Jim in return, and he quietly leaned in until his face was against the humans neck and he focused on the slightly floral notes of sandalwood that seemed to overwhelm his senses.
Kirk slowly started stroking up and down his back and his tremors grew stronger as he clutched at the black vest beneath his fingers.
He lost track of time as he stood in Jim’s embrace – he thought of how warm Jim was, how tight he was holding him and how he held tighter in response.
He slowly let himself relax into his captain until he had the silly thought that he might fly away if he let him go
Slowly, Jim brought his face up from Spock’s neck and mumbled, “Would you feel comfortable if I asked you to sleep in here with me tonight?” Spock nodded against his shoulder and blearily opened his eyes as Kirk lead them backwards towards his bed. “Lights at thirty percent.”
Kirk mumbled as he positioned Spock on his side in front of him so that his back was against his stomach. Jim let his hand close over Spock’s and he felt Jim rest his forehead against his neck as he let the warmth of Kirks arms lull him to sleep.