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Beau sped walked through the nearly empty hallways of Zadash High School. She was late again. Because her stupid third period teacher kept her after class again. Because Beau hadn’t done the stupid reading from the history textbook again. And, since she’d been shifted to fourth period AP Chem after second semester started, Caleb would be able to witness her lateness. Again.
And he would give her that look. Where he raised his eyebrow and kind of smirked at her, like “I’ve no room to judge you, but please do better, Beauregard”. Cuz he was an ass.
But at least he wasn’t fucking scared of her anymore.
It had been about nine weeks since Caleb had started coming to the after school Behavioral Correction Program, and he had slowly but surely integrated himself into all of their lives. First the club, then the group chat, then eating with them once a week, then twice a week. He still disappeared pretty frequently, still isolated when something set him off. Barely texted any of them, clung to Nott above everyone else, and refused to participate in any weekend plans. But it felt more and more normal for Caleb to be there, and more and more strange when he wasn’t.
And though she held out for a long fucking time, Beau begrudgingly admitted to herself that she liked having him around. He was deeply fucked up and self-flagellating, which was annoying as hell. But he was smart. Observant and calculating. Like Beau. Except he was kind, under all his mess, whereas she was filled with anger. It was cool, having him there to understand things that only she had understood before. Made her feel less alone. Which was stupid and cliché, so she buried it deep under layers of sarcasm and violence.
The bell rang and Beau cursed under her breath as she jogged down the hallway to the chemistry classroom. She had almost made it, but no. Caleb was going to give her his high-and-mighty little look, and she would punch him because he deserved it, and he would wince because he was weak as shit. And it would be good, but they would both pretend it wasn’t. Because that’s how they worked. That’s why they worked.
Beau ducked into the classroom and thanked God that Mr. Errenis was facing the whiteboard and not the door. Because the number of times she’d come to his classroom late was kind of appalling, and he was a patient man, but his patience would run out eventually. And that was not going to be a good day for Beau.
She quietly made her way to her seat, slipping into the desk beside Caleb. He glanced over at her, eyebrow raised, and she punched him for it. He winced, they moved on, Beau attempted to focus.
Luckily, it was a lab day, which meant that she only had to pay attention to Errenis for a second before she and Caleb could go do whatever lame ass experiment they were supposed to do, and he could tell her all the shit she really needed to know. Because he was a nerd.
As their teacher explained, they were going to be doing something with different salts and fire or something, and it was supposed to be very cool. But Mr. Errenis had been wrong about experiments being cool in the past, so Beau wasn’t keeping her expectations very high.
Soon enough, the class was dismissed to head to the lab, and Beau stood up as the other students began dividing themselves into groups. She held in a sigh as most of the class avoided eye contact with her, despite the fact that they knew she would partner with Caleb. Nobody wanted to be in a group with the only sophomore; that would make them supremely uncool for whatever bullshit reason they told themselves. But they were all dicks, so Beau didn’t care anyways.
It wasn’t like she wanted to be here, in a class above her grade level. But someone along the path of her life had labeled her “gifted” and told her parents that she needed to be “challenged” in order to succeed. And despite the fact that she failed half her classes from lack of effort, that label had stuck. And Beau had been thrown into a behavioral program and classes way above her status and told to do better. Which was all fucking bullshit they spewed at her to get her to try harder. But she didn’t want to try harder. She knew all the important shit. Chemistry was basically useless.
Caleb disagreed with her on that point, somewhat emphatically, but that was kind of his thing. He really liked to learn nitty gritty random facts and how to apply them to weird and niche situations. And she liked to learn how to live and be independent and sneak out of her house in the middle of the night. Different interests, she supposed.
Beau glanced behind her, making sure that Caleb was following her out of the classroom, but he wasn’t there. He was still sitting at his desk, staring at their lab worksheet with a blank expression on his face.
“Hey,” Beau said, ducking out of the way of the other students filing out of the room and moving back towards Caleb. She hit his shoulder lightly to get his attention. “You good, man?”
“Hm?” Caleb looked up at her, eyes slightly unfocused. Shit. Something was wrong. Beau wracked her brain for something that could have set him off. He’d seemed normal when she’d come in, but she hadn’t been paying enough attention to Mr. Errenis to know if he’d done something that could have freaked Caleb out before he dismissed the class.
Beau didn’t say anything else, just stared down at him, analyzing any minute changes in his expression. Trying to piece him together. Make sense of him.
Because even after nine weeks, Beau didn’t really get it. And she’d tried to. Analyzed every interaction they had, especially the ones from those first few weeks. Something had happened to him, to make him afraid. Distant. She knew that for certain. But she didn’t even have theories as to what it was. With the others in the group, she understood. She knew who they were and how they worked and why. But she didn’t have Caleb’s story, and that made him very hard to pin down. Other than the obvious, “nervous and detached”.
Eventually, after a few moments of Beau staring down at him, Caleb seemed to realize that she was still there. He blinked up at her, gaze coming more into focus.
“Ja, I’m fine. Let’s go,” he said, pushing his chair back from his desk. As if he hadn’t just zoned out for a full minute before responding. He stood up and left the classroom, not even waiting for Beau to follow him. So that was how it was gunna be today. Beau felt a prick of annoyance form at the base of her skull. Fucking perfect.
At least it was fourth period. She would have Nott and Molly to back her up in a little bit. Jester wouldn’t be there, though, and that fucking sucked. Her unending positivity in combo with Nott’s careful kindness was usually enough to pull Caleb out of his little episodes. But Jester, Fjord, and Yasha had left for a foreign exchange trip or some shit on Monday, and she and Molly were royally incompetent when it came to Caleb. She was banking on Nott. Which probably wasn’t fair to him, but their larger support system was scattered to the wind. It would do for now.
Trying to quell her irritation, Beau followed Caleb out of the classroom. She just hoped he would snap back to reality for the lab. He usually ate this shit up, and he’d be pissed if he missed one because of his flighty brain. Not that she cared about that. She just wanted him to do the work, so she didn’t have to. Obviously.
Arriving in the lab, Beau stood beside Caleb in one of the corner stations and listened to Errenis’ usual spiel about in-lab safety and wearing goggles and not doing anything stupid with fire. And then they were free to begin, and the lab room erupted in chatter as the students discussed just how many stupid things they wanted to do with fire.
Beau leaned against the counter and waited for Caleb to start moving. Start telling her what to write on their paper or to put salt into their little tins so they could light it up and watch it burn different colors. But he didn’t. He was just standing there, looking around the classroom as the rest of the class began their own experiments. And it was weird, but Beau didn’t think much of it. He might just be having a dissociated kind of day. It happened. He’d be mad about it later when he pulled himself out of it.
So, Beau turned her attention to the other groups, seeing if she could pick up the directions from watching them. She’d been relying on Caleb for this part, honestly.
Glancing around, Beau got to witness the first group light a fire. The students yelled in excitement, as the flame turned a haunting shade of green, and Mr. Errenis came over and began explaining what caused the difference in color. Beau had to admit that it was kind of cool. She watched the rest of the room as another group lit their fire. And another. And another. All different colors, vibrant blue and red and green. Accompanied by the somewhat less pleasant smell of burning chemicals slowly permeating the room.
Beau wrinkled her nose and turned back to Caleb. They should get this done ASAP so they could leave this room and not have to smell that shit anymore.
Beau’s stomach dropped. Caleb looked petrified, pressed against the wall and beginning to hyperventilate, his chest moving in quick, uneven breaths. His eyes were wild, darting around the classroom, flicking between the little fires lighting up around the room. Frantically searching for something that wasn’t there. Shit. Fuck. Fuck.
What the fuck was she supposed to do? This was so far above her pay grade. This was Nott territory, surely, but Nott wasn’t here, and Beau was, and she would have to be enough. Damn it. She wracked her brain.
“Hey. Caleb.” She tried to keep her voice gentle and took a step closer to him, but he didn’t acknowledge her. Didn’t seem to hear her. Like she wasn’t even there. Fuck.
She needed to get him out of here. She reached for Caleb’s shoulder, ready to pull him from the wall and somewhat forcefully evacuate him from the situation. But before she could actually touch him, something in the room clattered as a student dropped something. A notebook or a binder. Something insignificant.
But Caleb reacted. Slammed himself into the wall behind him like he’d been shot, covered his head with his hands and screamed. Sharp and guttural and full of terror and rage and misery. Broken raw panic.
Beau flinched away from him, the loud noise startling her backwards. She unconsciously raised her hands in surrender as she continued stepping away. What the fuck?
Quiet fell over the classroom as the students stared. No one moved. No one breathed. Caleb let out a few more choked sounds, sliding to the ground, before going completely silent. Completely still.
It was suffocating. Everyone standing and staring and not breathing.
And Beau stared right along with them. Like Caleb was some kind of alien, like she’d never met him before. But she had. She’d seen a lot of his messiness. Seen him out of it and curled in on himself, shaking with fear and scratching at his arms or playing with that blue thing he had. She’d seen all of it. But it was always silent, quiet and meek and sad. She’d never heard him yell. Never seen him like this.
Beau felt her hands shaking and hated that she was scared. She forced herself to step towards him, ignoring how her heart felt like it was going to explode in her chest. He wasn’t a fucking wild animal. He was Caleb. He was her friend. And, evidently, he fucking needed her, so she needed to pull her shit together and help God damnit.
Before she could get much closer, Caleb flinched hard, ducking into himself. And then, without even looking up he stumbled to his feet, mumbling something under his breath. And then, faster than she’d ever seen him move, Caleb ducked past Beauregard, shoving her against the lab table with his shoulder as he ran out of the classroom.
Beau just stood there for a few moments, stunned. Watched the door where her friend had just disappeared. And then, as the rest of the class looked to Mr. Errenis for some indication as to what they should do, Beau made a decision. She could outrun him, and it felt very, very dangerous for Caleb to be alone right now.
Beau bolted into the hallway and glanced around, catching a glimpse of Caleb’s long winter coat as he ducked around the corner. He was heading towards the bathrooms, most likely. That seemed good. He was getting himself away from whatever was bad in the room and the pressure of watching eyes, and Beau could approach him in a relatively safe environment. So, good on him. Smart, even when he was losing his fucking shit.
Beau got to the corner and watched Caleb slam into the bathroom door, desperately pushing it open and entering. Instinctively, Beau moved to follow, but she ended up standing outside the door to the boy’s bathroom, hand against the door. She’d been so certain of this plan; the adrenaline coursing through her pushed her to act quickly, to follow Caleb. But now that she was here… What the fuck was she going to do to help him? She was abrasive and bitter and everything Caleb didn’t need right now.
But he shouldn’t be alone. She was more certain of that fact than she was about most things in her life. Fuck it. Beau pulled out her phone and sent a quick text to Nott, telling him to get his ass to the bathroom in the science hall and pushed open the door.
By the grace of whatever fucked up God ruled the world, the bathroom was empty. Caleb was the only person in the room, and he’d already sequestered himself in one of the stalls, farthest from the door. Beau moved silently, keeping her footsteps light to try and avoid scaring her friend. Which was probably unavoidable at this point. But, damn it, she could try.
Beau pressed her hand gently against the stall door, testing to see if it would open. But it was locked. Because of course it was locked. Beau felt a momentary flash of annoyance before she pushed it away. Of course, Caleb would lock the door, he was fucking terrified. Jesus. She had to pull herself together if she was going to do anything useful here.
“Uh,” Beau started, keeping her voice soft. She got no response. Cleared her throat. “Caleb?”
No response. Fuck. Shit. What the fuck was she supposed to do if he couldn’t hear her? Or didn’t acknowledge her? Or didn’t come open this fucking stall door? Christ.
“Can you let me in?” Beau asked, once again trying to school her usually brash voice into something softer and gentler.
Nothing. God fucking damn it.
Beau held in a sigh, and pressed her forehead against the stall door, “Caleb, you gotta give me something here.”
She heard him inhale sharply at those words. She didn’t know if that was good or bad, but it was something. There was silence for a moment, and Beau was worried it had been a fluke. That she’d imagined the sound, or he’d gasped at something in his head.
Then there was a brief scuffling noise, the sound of Caleb standing up, moving towards her. Beau held her breath as his legs came into view from underneath the stall door. Holy shit. The lock clicked open, and then Caleb was there. Standing on shaky legs, staring at the ground, hand still gripping the door. She’d done it.
“Uh, you okay?” Beau asked, hesitating and awkward. Obviously he wasn’t, but she didn’t know what else to say.
Caleb simply nodded. Which was a lie, and they both knew it.
“Do you, uh,” Beau inhaled. She was so fucking bad at this. “Do you want to sit back down?”
Caleb nodded and moved to the corner of the stall, sliding down the wall to sit against it. and Beau followed, closing the door behind her as she went. She opened her mouth to say something, but her voice stalled in her throat. God, she was useless. She didn’t know why she was so hesitant; it didn’t suit her. She was reckless and stupid, and made bad decisions for good reasons, but she couldn’t make herself talk. Didn’t want to make it worse. So, she just sat there beside him.
“I’m sorry for worrying you,” Caleb’s voice was barely a whisper, and his accent came in thicker than it usually did. “You didn’t have to follow me.”
“Bullshit,” Beau said, and Caleb flinched. Beau closed her eyes and exhaled. “Sorry.”
“’s fine,” Caleb murmured, picking at the sleeve of his coat.
“You wanna tell me what happened?” Beau asked. She watched Caleb’s face, searching for some indication of what was going on. But it remained very carefully blank.
And then the bathroom door swung open again, and Beau watched Caleb’s eyes fill with panic before Nott’s voice echoed through the space.
“Caleb?” Footsteps on the linoleum floor. He was so much gentler than Beau could ever be. Comforting and kind. Beau’s body relaxed as relief flooded through her. Reinforcements were here, and Nott would help, and it would be fine. “Can I come in?”
Caleb opened his mouth and then shut it again. Finally, after several seconds of trying to speak, he nodded, glancing at Beau very briefly, something like shame sitting in his eyes.
“Oh,” she said. “Uh, yeah. He says yeah.”
Nott carefully pushed open the stall door, gaze immediately locking on to Caleb. His wild eyes scanned the Zemnian, analyzing in a way that Beau rarely saw from Nott. His panic seemed to diminish ever so slightly, and he moved carefully over to them, sitting crisscrossed in front of Beau. Giving Caleb some space.
Caleb glanced up anyways, and Nott gave him a faint smile. Like Caleb was the most important person in the world. Something about it tightened Beau’s throat, and she continued to be silent, pulling her knees to her chest and wrapping her arms around them. Stupid fucking emotions. She swallowed, and forced whatever stupid ass feeling had just assaulted her back.
“Hello,” Nott said.
“Hallo,” Caleb whispered. His gaze moved back to the floor.
“What do you need, Caleb?” Nott asked because Nott was so much better at this than Beau was.
Caleb shrugged and kept picking at a thread on his coat.
“Would it be okay if Beau told me what happened? You were in class together, right?” Nott asked, glancing between Caleb and Beau, trying to put a story together in his mind.
Caleb was silent for several moments. And then he looked up at Beau, a panicked desperation in his eyes. Dread fell in Beau’s stomach. He didn’t want Nott to know. And she would have to bullshit her way through this conversation, pretending that she was clueless. Fucking hell. How did she always get in this position? With Caleb begging her not to let his brokenness show.
“I’m not sure what happened, honestly,” Beau said with a shrug, trying to keep her annoyance from showing through. Caleb seemed to deflate in relief, and for some reason that bothered Beau even more. How the fuck was anyone supposed to help him if he didn’t tell anyone what was happening? She was fucking sick of it.
“Was it the fire?” Beau asked, some dark piece of her not really caring what it did to Caleb.
The Zemnian flinched, burying his head in his knees. A twinge of regret tried to push into Beau’s mind, but she shut it down. She wanted him to be better. In the long run, not just right now. And she was fucking sick of letting him skirt by without taking accountability for his own growth.
“Leave it, Beauregard,” Caleb said, voice ragged and desperate.
But Beau didn’t want to leave it.
“What fire?” Nott asked, still glancing between them, confusion clear in his eyes, in the way he tugged at his stringy hair.
Beau ignored him.
“Please, Caleb,” Beau said, gentling her voice as much as she was capable of, “Please just answer that one question.”
Caleb shook his head miserably, without even raising his head from its hiding place.
“It wasn’t the fire?” Beau clarified. That had been her best guess, since Caleb had seemed fine before they started talking about the experiment in class. Had only gotten worse once kids had started lighting up their tiny, colorful fires.
“Not only,” Caleb said. “It was part of it, I suppose.”
“Can you tell us what it was?” Nott asked, despite the fact that he had no idea what either of them were talking about.
Caleb shook his head again.
“Why not?” Beau asked, more challenge in her voice than was probably warranted. A bit too much of her panicked anger coming through, and Nott tapped her knee briefly, giving her a scolding look. Fuck. She was bad at this. Beau opened her mouth to apologize, but Caleb interrupted her.
“I’m not allowed to tell you,” Caleb whispered, pained and pleading. “Please, just leave it, Beauregard.”
What? Cold, white, anger slammed into Beau like a bolt of lightning.
“Who the fuck said you weren’t allowed?” Beau growled, voice so much louder than it really should be. No one—no one—had the right to tell Caleb what the fuck he could and couldn’t say. That was bullshit, and she would beat the fucking life out of whoever had made him believe otherwise.
She’d spent too fucking long under the thumb of her parents to let it slide for any of her friends. Because fuck that.
“Beauregard,” Caleb begged her. But she wasn’t going to drop this.
“No, Caleb,” Beau said. “Who the fuck told you that?”
“It was the smell,” Caleb said, eyes panicked as he desperately deflected her question with an answer to Nott’s from before. Beau’s blood boiled. “Chemicals burning.”
“Caleb,” Beau said, voice steely, barely even acknowledging his answer. She wouldn’t fucking stand for this. He couldn’t keep thinking someone else could control his life.
“Beau, maybe-” Nott’s voice was cautious and concerned, and Beau knew she should really let it go, but she couldn’t. Caleb was sitting in a bathroom, shaking like a leaf, and unable to seek comfort because some asshole had told him he wasn’t allowed. That he wasn’t worth it.
Fuck that. Fuck that.
“Caleb,” Beau said again, willing him to understand. “No one can control what you can and can’t say-”
“It was the fucking government, Beauregard,” Caleb snapped, voice echoing in the empty bathroom.
Silence followed it. Heavy and stagnant.
“You’re in Witness Protection?” The question fell from Beau’s lips after several moments, shock rendering her voice nearly inaudible.
Caleb moaned in response, scratching at the back of his neck as he continued to hide his face behind his knees. That was all the response Beau needed.
Somehow, in all this time, Witness Protection had never crossed her mind. She hadn’t even considered it. But hearing it now, so many things clicked into place, and Beau felt kind of sick. Holy fuck.
“Jesus,” Nott said, quiet, to himself. Processing.
And then the room fell silent once again.
Beau focused in on Caleb’s ragged, panicked breathing. He was in Witness Protection. She knew she should leave it there, should let that be enough. But her mind started working, trying to think of what Caleb could have seen. What he could have witnessed to land him here. He was from Rexxentrum before this, he’d said. Which could have been a lie, but Beau didn’t think so. It had seemed honest. Seemed to hold the weight that a hometown would, every time Caleb mentioned it.
Beau tried to stop herself from analyzing further. The entire point of Witness Protection was to keep anyone from knowing what you were associated with. To keep you safe. But Rexxentrum tickled something in the back of Beau’s mind. There’d been something big in Rexxentrum, hadn’t there? About a year ago? Beau pulled out her phone. The timeline didn’t exactly add up with Caleb coming to their school, but something about that city wouldn’t leave Beau alone.
She googled it. Recent events in Rexxentrum.
Almost instantly, her screen filled with articles and articles about The Soltryce Academy. Oh fuck. Beau’s mouth went dry as she scanned the top story. She’d heard about this, very vaguely, when it had happened.
The school hand selected bright, young kids to come be part of their rigorous education system, but there was very little known about what actually happened at Soltryce until about a year ago.
Beau read the next sentence, and her stomach dropped.
A year ago, a fire had broken out at the school, drawing the attention of local law enforcement. Through the investigation of the fire, it was uncovered that the school was not what it seemed, and the staff had been torturing the students, experimenting on them to create chemicals and drugs tailored to create different psychological and physical effects. Most of the staff were taken into custody, and after a painstaking and sickening trial, which continued to reveal layer upon layer of corruption, the school was shut down and most of the staff were imprisoned.
Beau’s phone fell from her hand and clattered on the bathroom floor as the final details clicked into place.
Burning chemicals. That’s what Caleb had just said. The smell of burning chemicals. The fire. Beau tried to keep her breathing normal. Tried to pretend that she hadn’t just put it all together. Caleb didn’t need to worry about her knowing this shit. She could be wrong, anyways. She could be wrong, Beau told herself, trying to settle her churning stomach. She reached for her phone with shaking hands.
“Beau, what is it?” Nott asked, now fully panicked, wildly scanning her face. “What is it?”
Beau ignored him once again and looked over at Caleb. He was staring at her, eyes shining with horror. He knew. He could see that she knew, instantly. He moaned again, squeezing his eyes shut as his breathing picked up speed.
“Holy shit, Caleb,” Her voice wavered, and she hated it.
“I told you to leave it, Beauregard,” Caleb whimpered, between panicked breaths.
“What the fuck is going on?” Nott cried frantically. “What is it?”
Beau looked at Caleb, silently asking permission. Caleb met her gaze for the briefest of moments before he nodded, digging his fingers deeper into the skin on his neck. Any harder and he would draw blood, but Beau couldn’t speak. Couldn’t stop him. Not right now.
Beau slid her phone over to Nott, watched his wild eyes scan the words on the screen, watched him grow paler and paler as he read. Watched his eyes fill with tears.
“Caleb,” Nott’s voice was broken, raspy and panicked. “You were there? At that place?”
Caleb didn’t say anything, but that was enough. Nott let out a choked noise and stood. For a moment, Beau thought he was going to go throw up. But instead, he moved to stand directly in front of Caleb, knelt down and pulled him into a hug, arms shaking and breathing uneven.
Beau watched them. Heard Nott’s breathing quicken as he tried not to cry, gripping Caleb’s coat like a lifeline. Watched Caleb’s eyes gloss over, trembling in Nott’s arms before he stopped moving entirely. Abandoning his own mind. Guilt dropped heavy into Beau’s stomach. She’d done this. God, she couldn’t just leave things alone for one fucking second, could she? Jesus.
The bell for fourth period to end rang, and Beau stood up. Swallowing, she shoved her guilt back and moved to the main door of the bathroom. Stepped outside. People would be trying to flood into this bathroom any second, and she was going to beat the shit out of all of them. They could find another fucking restroom. This one was Caleb’s, and she wasn’t going to let a single fucking person through this door.
…
Molly sat in Bryce’s classroom alone. It had been about ten minutes since school had gotten out, and his friends—at least the three that were still in Zadash—were nowhere to be seen. Which was just bloody fantastic, wasn’t it?
First, Yasha left on a trip to wherever the fuck with Jester and Fjord, and now he was the only one bothering to show up to the club. Which felt ironic. Of all the people in the group, how had he ended up the sole attendee? He was supposed to be flighty asshole here.
Molly took out his phone and sent a text to his group chat with Beau, Nott and Caleb.
3:47- hey where the hell are you guys?
With that taken care of, Molly resolved himself to stop giving a shit. He opened a game on his phone and tried to ignore the nagging worry poking at the back of his brain.
But after several minutes of waiting, there was still no response. No one had even read his message yet. Were they ignoring him? Molly pushed that thought from his mind because it was dumb. If any of them had a problem with him, Beau would tell him. Bluntly, in fact. Possibly with violence. So it wasn’t that.
Molly refocused on the game on his phone.
They would be here soon. Eventually. Caleb didn’t skip these things, at the very least, not unless it was Tuesday. So, he would be here, and Nott usually followed where Caleb led. Beau might skip, but Nott and Caleb would show up at some point.
But ten minutes bled to fifteen bled to twenty. And Molly’s conviction faltered.
What did it matter if they came, anyways? He could sit here for an hour by himself. Sure, it would be awkward with just he and Bryce, but he could work on assignments or text with Yasha, find out what adventures she and the others had gotten up to. It didn’t matter if Beau or Nott and Caleb showed up. He didn’t care, and everything was going to be fine.
“Have you heard from anyone, Molly?” Bryce asked from the front of the room, finally breaking the silence in the room and looking in Molly’s direction. “Did anyone tell you they were ditching?”
“If they had, I’d be with them,” Molly said with a shrug.
“Fair enough,” Bryce worried at their bottom lip, eyebrows furrowed. “Right. I’m going to call down to Mr. Sol’s office. Caleb might be there.”
Molly shrugged again and opened his private message with Yasha. He didn’t really remember what time it was wherever she was, but he hoped she was awake.
3:59- hello lovely!! Hows your day going? give the others my love <3
There was no immediate response. Which was fair. She was busy, doing trip things. Tours and learning and stuff. That was fine.
Molly turned his attention back to Bryce.
“You haven’t seen him?” They asked into the phone. There was a pause, while they listened to Pumat’s response. “No. None of them mentioned having to skip today.”
Bryce paused and glanced over at him. Molly tried not to squirm in his seat. He popped the collar of his coat and slid down into it, turning his phone back on and staring at it.
“No. Molly’s still here.”
Molly’s phone buzzed, and he straightened his posture. Maybe it was Yasha. A smile began forming on his face instinctually, but his heart sunk when he read the message.
[Beau] 4:03—hey man, sorry. shit went down, Caleb and nott both went home, im outside
A bead of anxiety dropped in Molly’s stomach, but he inhaled and exhaled and dispelled it. That was fine. Shit went down in their group like twice a week. They were all a little volatile.
Molly glanced up at Bryce. They were listening intently to whatever was happening on the phone, not really paying attention to anything else. Molly gave them a slight wave and watched their eyes focus in on him.
“Hey Pumat, I have to go. Molly might have something. Yeah. Thank you.” Bryce set the phone down and looked up at Molly. “What’s up? Is everything okay?”
“Uh, yeah. Beau just texted. They’re not coming,” Molly said simply. “Not sure why.”
“Right,” Bryce inhaled slowly, running a hand through their hair. They stood there for a moment, seeming to contemplate a thousand things at once before their posture deflated slightly. “Well, I guess there’s not much point in keeping you here by yourself, then, is there?”
Molly shrugged.
“Okay. You’re good to go if you want. Just-” They paused, exhaled. “Shoot me an email if any of you need anything, okay?”
“Alright,” Molly said because what else was he supposed to say? He stood from his desk and threw his backpack over his shoulder. “Thanks.”
“Yep,” they said quietly. “Have a good rest of your day, Molly.”
Molly nodded and ducked out of the classroom. He felt sort of small, walking out of the building alone, footsteps echoing on the linoleum floor. He couldn’t remember the last time this had happened. He always had at least Yasha with him, usually the rest of them as well. A pack of people around him, like a safety net.
It was more of a relief than it should have been to step out into the cold, late-fall air. He pulled his coat tighter around himself, and immediately caught sight of Beau, sitting on her usual bench. She was hunched over, arms folded across her knees. Molly inhaled slowly. It was strange, seeing her so small. None of her cocky bullshit swagger. A small part of him took petty satisfaction in that, but a much bigger part hoped she was just hunched over to block out the cold.
“Hey,” he said carefully, moving around the bench to sit next to her. He didn’t know if “shit going down” meant she was pissed, but she had a history of lashing out at him when she was. Something about him rubbed her the wrong way. Which. Fair.
She glanced up at him from her hunched position before looking back at the ground.
“Bryce let you go?” Her voice was different than normal, and he couldn’t see her face behind the fur lining of her jacket.
“Yeah,” Molly said. He cleared his throat, tapping his foot against the ground. This wasn’t right. Beau was supposed to be fiery and angry. Not whatever this was. He should try to help right? That’s what friends did? “You alright?”
“Oh, I’m fucking great,” Beau scoffed, and Molly nodded to himself. Fair enough. Probably a stupid question.
“What happened?” Molly tried instead, trying to embody Yasha’s gentle kindness. But it didn’t fit him right, and the words came out slightly patronizing. Molly winced internally but shook it off. At least he was trying.
“Can we not do this right now?” Beau said, pushing herself into an upright position and running a hand down her face. “I’m fucking tired.”
“Yeah, alright,” Molly said, raising his hands in surrender. Probably better this way, anyways. He didn’t know how the fuck to help, and it wasn’t his business. It was hers. And Nott’s and Caleb’s maybe. Either way, it wasn’t his problem.
“You wanna walk somewhere? Get coffee or something?” He said because he was fucking cold and drinking something warm sounded amazing. And maybe Beau needed a distraction. But that was secondary. Definitely.
They had time to kill anyways; it would be an hour until either of their guardians even considered coming to pick them up. Beau’s parents worked, and Gustav would more than likely forget that Molly needed a ride since Yasha always brought him home.
“God, fine,” Beau said with an annoyed huff. Molly let out a small sigh of relief. That was better.
“Fine, then,” Molly said back with all the dramatic flair he had, before standing up and offering her his hand. Beau raised an eyebrow at him, unimpressed, and smacked the hand away, standing and starting towards the main road. Molly followed dutifully behind her, laughing at her hostility to lighten the mood.
Beau didn’t say much on the walk, but Molly rambled about various things because he prided himself on his ability to distract people from actually important shit. And it worked once again. Because by the time they’d gotten their drinks, and returned to the bench, Beau was somewhat back to normal. Giving him shit and punching him every time he did something annoying. Which was deliberately frequent, just to give her dumb ass something to focus on.
Beau collapsed dramatically onto the bench, spreading her legs wide and throwing an arm over the side. Because she was obnoxious and gay, and Molly respected the hell out of that. It was better than the curled-up mess from before.
Molly sat beside her and sipped at his cider.
“So,” Molly said after a while. “Are you actually not going to tell me what’s going on?”
“No,” Beau took a deep breath. “I’m not.”
“Well, fuck,” Molly said, the no-hesitation, quick response throwing him off ever so slightly. “There you go, then.”
“Not my shit to tell,” Beau shrugged. “Sorry.”
“No, that’s fair enough,” Molly said. There was another moment of silence. “You’re okay, though?”
There was a long pause. Hesitation. Beau sipped at her coffee. Swallowed and inhaled.
“Sure,” she said finally, lightly punching at his leg with her free hand. “We’ll call it okay for now.”
Molly hummed and took a drink of his cider.
After several minutes of silence, Molly watched Beau’s father’s car pull into the parking lot and heard Beau groan. He bumped his knee against hers in a tiny act of sympathy, and she punched him for it. Which was fair.
“Good luck with dickwad,” Molly made a big show of waving to Beau’s father as he pulled up, plastering a stupid grin on his face as he spoke quietly to Beau. His efforts rewarded him with a snort from Beau as she stood and threw her backpack over her shoulder.
“You’re a piece of shit.” She sounded annoyed, but it was a compliment. Grateful and fond.
“You love me,” Molly smirked as she started towards the car.
“Whatever you say, asshole,” Beau shot back. And then she opened the door, and Molly watched her deflate as she fell into the passenger’s seat. A pinprick of sadness pinched at Molly’s chest for a moment and then she was gone, her father pulling out of the parking lot and onto the main road.
And Molly was alone. Again. He wasn’t in love with this trend if he was honest. He liked people around him, giving him something to focus on. Someone to talk to. Someone to listen. Alone meant time to think and worry and make bad decisions.
Molly pulled out his phone. Maybe Yasha had time to respond to the message he’d sent earlier. He turned on his phone and was met with nothing. Molly sipped at his cider. That was fine. She was just busy, and it was all going to be fine.
He could handle being lonely for a little while.