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In the royal gardens, there was a large tree with a turtleduck pond. Underneath that blooming tree sat the hunched, crying form of little Zuko. There was a reason he didn’t like his family’s visits to the royal palace: Fire Lord Azulon. It was no secret he was greatly displeased by Zuko’s apparent weakness in firebending and once again, he had been forced to perform in front of his grandfather. Surprisingly, this time it hadn’t been mother who had taken him into her arms afterwards, but father. Zuko had felt embarrassed and humiliated, especially when father had been harshly scolded about siring a weak firstborn when his wife was Avatar Roku’s granddaughter.
Father was terrifying when he was furious and Zuko had felt ashamed that he brought his father dishonour. When mother and father had started arguing, Zuko had used the chance to sneak away to his favourite place in the royal palace: the turtleduck pond.
Dejected, Zuko wiped away his tears and half-heartedly threw a small pebble into the pond. Even Azula, two years younger than him, was more promising. Azulon had high hopes for her. Apparently, she had the spark, which had been so weak at Zuko’s own birth. While she hasn’t started firebending yet, it won’t be long now. He swallowed. Where will his place in the family be, when Azula will outshine him? When she will be father’s pride, the one to bring him honour instead of disgrace?
A faint rustling of clothes had Zuko look up and immediately lower his gaze. Father was standing next to him, his expression unreadable. It was enough to make Zuko’s eyes well up again, but he didn’t make a sound. He was hyper-aware of father kneeling next to him. Some more rustling of the sleeves, then he turned Zuko’s face towards him. With a handkerchief, father slowly removed the snot and dried the tears.
-
Ozai was at his wit’s end. What was he supposed to say? He had been decent at consoling when Zuko had been a baby, but now, when he was at an age where words were needed Ozai found himself bereft of knowledge. He sighed internally. Ursa was so much better at this. Wracking his usually smart brain for anything useful, he let his eyes trail up to the blossoms. An idea struck him.
-
Zuko wished to escape this situation. After father had put away the dirty handkerchief, he simply knelt and said nothing. However, he didn’t dare dash off. He didn’t want to anger father further. Suddenly, father shifted and sat next to Zuko, leaning against the trunk.
“My, what beautiful blossoms this tree has this year, don’t you think?”, father’s smooth voice commented and Zuko shifted his eyes up. Though, he was confused, expecting something different.
“They are beautiful.”, he responded quietly. Father put an arm around Zuko’s waist and pulled him closer. He pointed to one of the branches and when Zuko spotted what he meant, he was even more confused.
“Look at that. There is one which is still small and closed, but it too will bloom and when it does, it will be no less radiant than the others.”
Zuko looked up at his father and saw his lips drawn into a small smile. Luckily, Zuko was used to his father’s way of thinking and speaking and so, depsite his young age, he didn’t miss what his father meant. Zuko buried his face into father’s waist and was moved to sit on the lap instead. For a moment, it was quiet, before Zuko spoke up.
“I’m sorry for being such a failure. For dishonouring you. For not having the same spark as Azula.”, he whispered into his father’s chest. Father forced him to look into his eyes, which were stern and angry but warm.
“Never say that, do you hear me? I do not want to hear such thoughts, which are false, out of your mouth again. You don’t dishonour me by being a weaker firebender or a late bloomer.”
“But if I were better, you and grandfather wouldn’t fight all the time. You and mother wouldn’t fight.” Zuko’s voice broke at the end of the last sentence and his father pulled him into a hug. Father’s hugs were rare and Zuko relished them whenever he had the chance.
“The Fire Lord and I’s fighting goes back to my childhood, Zuko. Even if you were a stronger bender, he would find something to nag. As for your mother: All couples fight. Your mother wants to leave and return to Nizero just as much as you and I want to. Those meetings with the Fire Lord stress her and, well, I am not the easiest to deal with when I’m angry, which only agitates further.”
This elicited a smile from Zuko. “That’s true. Only Ruk, Nihayu and mother know how to deal with you.”
Father inclined his head, before he grew serious again. “As for the spark and thus your firebending: It doesn’t matter. Spark or no spark, you are my son and nothing will change that.”
“Even if I didn’t have a spark?”
Father nodded. “You know why?”
Zuko shook his head and suddenly started giggling as father’s fingers quickly flew over his sides and stomach until he was gasping for air. Father cupped Zuko’s face with a hand and his eyes grew warmer.
“Because that would just mean you have more of your mother in you.”
Zuko threw his little arms around his father and for a while, they stayed like that, underneath the blooming tree next to the turtleduck pond.
-
(After Zuko had left, Ozai stayed a bit longer, stewing on his own thoughts. Soon, Ursa joined him. “You did well.”, she teased him and her husband hummed in agreement.
“That, Fire Lily, is true.”, he grinned, and she put her head on his shoulder.)