Archive of Our Own

Reo is amazing. It’s a fact of the world that everyone accepts. Nagi himself happened upon this realization shortly after meeting the boy in that stairwell. Reo is amazing on the field, sending Nagi the perfect cross each time and making the enemy defense look like children playing their first game. Reo is amazing in classes, always scoring the highest in the class without fail and helping his peers study for upcoming exams. Reo is amazing to Nagi, too, in more ways than he can ever know.

Unfortunately, a few too many people have noticed how amazing Reo is. That is to say, people who aren’t Nagi noticed. This itself isn’t necessarily a bad thing, until it is.

Nagi leans against the cool steel of the lockers as Reo finishes packing away his things. Reo is talking about something to do with their upcoming game, and Nagi is listening while absentmindedly tapping away at a gacha game. It’s a simple routine, but an enjoyable one.

“Hey, Reo?”

The simple, enjoyable routine is shattered by an unfamiliar voice and an unfamiliar face. Reo shifts to face the girl, backpack half full in hand. His automatic polite smile is already in place as he waves a greeting. Nagi doesn’t like that smile on him. He frowns at his phone.

One of his units is almost dead. Ah.

The girl who spawned from nowhere continues. “I was wondering if you’re free right now? I’d like to talk to you about something.”

Nagi misclicks and uses the wrong skill. Damn.

Reo’s smile turns a bit more strained, but his tone remains amiable. “Ah, sorry, but we have practice today, and I need to get the field set up.” The girl visibly deflates from the corner of Nagi’s vision. “...Maybe another time, though?” Reo adds apologetically. It’s clear he doesn’t mean it, but the possibility of Reo entertaining this random girl he’s never met who’s trying to confess to him…

Nagi’s Lancer dies. Man.

The NPC perks up at the flimsy Reo threw like an overeager fish. “I can just give you my number, then!” Before Reo can respond, she’s already reaching into her bag for her phone.

Nagi doesn’t register what he’s doing until he’s already slipping his own phone into his hoodie pocket and grabbing Reo’s arm, tugging him closer.

“Reo…” he whines, “I’m tired of standing. Can we go now?”

Reo’s fake grin immediately softens into a genuine one as he looks at Nagi. That’s a much better look on him. A small part of Nagi feels strangely satisfied that he’s the only one who receives Reo’s real smiles. Reo doesn’t look at anyone else but him with his eyes shining like the sun. Ha, Nagi thinks, take that, random NPC.

“Alright, Nagi, just give me a second,” Reo tells him, bringing a hand up to Nagi’s hair and smoothing down the parts where it’s certainly sticking up from his earlier nap. Nagi leans into the touch with a contented sigh. Reo doesn’t do this to anyone else, either. Take that, world.

Nagi forgets that there’s a girl next to them trying to steal Reo away from him until she coughs awkwardly. Reo seems to have forgotten too, because he startles and pulls away. Ugh. Couldn’t she have just despawned like mobs normally do in games when you’re idle? Cringe.

“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you…” she trails off, taking a step back. “Ah, nevermind!” With that, she walks off hurriedly with her head ducked down. Out of the loading zone she goes…

Reo’s eyebrows draw together in slight confusion for a moment before he shrugs and grins at Nagi once again. “Thanks, Nagi!”

Reo has already turned back to his locker to finish up packing away his textbooks and notes. “Huh? For what?” Nagi asks. He still needs to finish that battle in his game, but if he looks away from Reo, another random event might drop on him. He leans against the lockers again instead with his hands stuffed into his pockets.

“I’m not sure, but whatever you did, it got her to leave me alone. Most of the time, they don’t leave until I put their number in my phone… So,” Reo looks up from his crouched position on the floor and beams at Nagi. “Thank you!”

Nagi stares at him. Reo is not only amazing, but he’s cute, too. It’s understandable why everyone in their school shoots their shot with him. His expressive violet eyes are comparable to no other, and his face is soft around the edges like a midday cloud. The way his hair is cut intentionally uneven, framing his face in a gentle sheet of lilac, is alluring on its own. Reo is beautiful. Reo is adorable. Reo is the only person Nagi ever wants to look at.

Nagi doesn’t realize how long has passed since he started staring at Reo before his best friend is standing in front of him, a casual grin on his lips as he holds out his backpack to Nagi.

“I’ll carry you, just hold onto this,” he says.

After a slow blink to return to his senses, Nagi reaches out to take it. Their fingertips brush for an infinitesimal second, a blink and you miss it moment. Nagi immediately notes how cool Reo’s hands are. They feel nice. Maybe they’d make a good ice pack against his forehead at practice later.

Reo’s already pulling his hand away and shifting around to allow Nagi to climb onto his back. On their way to the locker room, Nagi can’t stop thinking about the feel of Reo’s hand against his own. He’s somewhat curious. Would his hand be bigger than Reo’s, or the same size? Are Reo’s fingers as calloused as his own, or are they nimble and smooth? How would they feel in Nagi’s own? Would Reo’s palms sweat with nerves, or would he firmly hold onto Nagi as though nothing could separate the two?

Nagi wants to hold Reo’s hand. Just once, that’d be enough, probably. His eyes drift shut as Reo carries him throughout the halls, backpack dangling from his loose grip in front of them. It’s not long before he’s nodding off to half-formed fantasies of Reo’s smiles and cool hands against his own.

-x-

It’s not uncommon for people to confess to Reo. It’s an occurrence that is too frequent for Nagi’s taste (which is to say, the fact that it happens at all is too frequent for him), but Reo always addresses them with a polite smile and courteous rejection. Often, Nagi is right beside him, tapping away at his phone or dozing off as another suitor tries to romance his best friend. It’s becoming a pain to deal with, and Nagi isn’t even the one receiving these advances. Yet, he can’t deny the small wriggle of satisfaction in his chest that comes with each rejection he witnesses.

Eventually, though, it seems that even Reo’s polite nature has a breaking point.

After waving off yet another faceless NPC (in Nagi’s eyes, anyway), Reo sighs and collapses onto the step beside Nagi. They’re at the stairwell where they first met. Nagi prefers the quiet pocket of space as opposed to the cafeteria, and Reo indulges him when he’s free of his extracurricular activities. It feels like their own world, so Nagi is displeased that someone tainted the atmosphere and Reo’s mood.

Nagi glances up from his phone as he taps at a rhythm game. His fingers don’t falter on the speedily moving circles when he says, “Another one?’

Reo places his head in his hands, hair swinging around his face to create a curtain of purple and shielding his expression from the world. “Yeah, another one,” he mumbles.

They fall into a comfortable silence that is only broken by the high-pitched music emanating from Nagi’s phone. He’s almost done with the level as he’s cheered on by the brightly colored 2D characters on the side of the screen. Absent-mindedly, he thinks Reo is kind of like one of those rhythm game characters, cheering him on for every play he makes in a game. He would spend money on a rhythm game with Reo as the mascot that flashes in the corner of his screen chanting praises.

“Hey, Nagi,” Reo says, lifting his head from his hands and shifting to face Nagi directly.

After giving Reo a small hum of acknowledgement without looking up, Reo continues: “I think… I have an idea to get these confessions to stop,” he says hesitantly. From the corner of Nagi’s vision, he sees Reo’s hands fiddling with the fabric of his uniform jacket. “I’ll need your help, though.”

So close, just a few more notes in the song. Nagi makes another small sound of inquiry. He doesn’t mind helping Reo, since Reo never asks Nagi for more than he’s capable of giving.

Reo hesitates for a moment before letting it out all in one breath: “If we could get everyone to think that I’m dating you, they’ll stop asking me out.”

Nagi misses the last note as his phone falls from his hands and bounces on the step below. He is not in the present state of mind to make a god-like trap for that one, unfortunately.

Reo gasps, reaching for Nagi’s phone to check it for cracks and muttering apologies, but Nagi’s brain still hasn’t caught up. He turns to face Reo. “Are you… asking me out?” he asks, dumbly.

“No, no!” Reo says, waving his hands frantically as his face reddens. He’s looking everywhere but Nagi and laughing nervously. Nagi frowns in disappointment, but Reo continues. “I mean like, we just pretend we’re dating at school in front of other people! And then people will stop asking me out, eventually.”

Pretend to date? Why can’t they just date? Nagi keeps frowning, and Reo deflates, eyes lowering to the ground dejectedly. “Ah, sorry, you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to. It’s a weird idea, anyways.”

Nagi blinks. Why would Reo think he doesn’t want to date him, pretend or not? He grabs Reo’s wrist to still his hand and tugs until the other boy is looking at him again. His violet eyes aren’t as bright as they usually are, and his eyebrows are drawn together slightly in thought. That won’t do, Reo has a tendency to think self-destructively, and the downward spiral is one that unravels in a matter of moments.

“Reo,” he says, looking his best friend in the eyes, “I don’t mind. Just tell me what to do.”

Reo freezes completely beneath his touch at that. A moment passes where they just stare like nothing else in the world exists, and then Reo’s face is spreading into a pleased grin. Without warning, he tugs his hand from Nagi’s grasp and flings his arms over Nagi’s shoulders, latching on tight.

“Thank you, Nagi! What would I do without you?”

Probably a lot of things, Nagi thinks. Reo doesn’t need him, not really. He’s amazing on his own. Still, Nagi wraps his own arms around Reo’s waist. He usually doesn’t return Reo’s grand shows of physical affection, content to be showered with it and Reo fine with giving it, but if they’re meant to be a pretend couple… he supposes he can put forth the effort.

It’s not a pain. It never is, for Reo.

Reo pulls away and gives him the most luminous smile Nagi has ever seen. Reo is always so expressive, but he only shows his truest feelings to Nagi. Everytime Reo looks at Nagi, it’s like he’s laying his heart bare in Nagi’s hands, regardless of whether it beats with joy or despair. Nagi has seen Reo leap and clap with joy after helping Nagi score a hat trick, and Nagi has seen Reo snap at his phone and kick a table leg while on the phone with his father. Nagi has never had a friend before he met Reo, and while he has a feeling this isn’t exactly how most friendships go, he doesn’t mind the intensity of it. Or the intensity of Reo.

As Reo hands Nagi his (unbroken) phone, he rambles on about how they just need to do some PDA in front of their classmates every now and then and maybe use some pet names to sell the idea. Nagi is listening, but there’s a louder voice in his head that’s telling him:

This would be the perfect excuse to hold Reo’s hand.

-x-

They don’t have to do much more than what they normally do to sell their fake relationship.

Nagi continues to drape himself over Reo’s back and shoulder at any given opportunity, and Reo will support his weight with an easy smile. Reo continues to give Nagi anything and everything he could ever want in front of his locker at the beginning of the school day rather than in the privacy of either of their rooms. They spend all of their time together, have lunch together, study together (though, it’s more of Reo studying his pristine color-coded notes while Nagi slumps against his shoulder), and drive to and from school together. It’s not at all different from their normal routine, except for a couple of things.

Reo has taken to calling Nagi his ‘treasure’ more casually, rather than just on the soccer field. It fills Nagi’s chest with a tiny warm swell of pride every time Reo calls him ‘his’ in front of others. Nagi, in turn, tried to think of a cute pet name for Reo, but… well, his meager experience with dating simulators didn’t prepare him for this.

“Here you go, my treasure! The newest Splatoon game!” Reo had said, handing over the case with a grin.

Nagi had taken it. “Thanks, my… um…” He stared at Reo, thinking for a long moment. Reo raised an eyebrow in anticipation. “my… sweetheart?”

Reo’s face dropped immediately and turned a concerning shade of red. “...You know what, Reo is probably just better.”

Nagi thinks so too. To him, Reo is Reo, and that’s an endearment on its own.

It doesn’t take long for news of their relationship to circle throughout the school. While some people mention that they aren’t surprises, others have more outlandish reactions. Nagi hadn’t thought about the consequences of his actions, but now he realizes the error in his ways as he feels the glare of a thousand suns on his back while he passes through the hallways. He doesn’t care enough to feel frightened at the possibility of one of his classmates murdering him on his way home for bagging the it boy of their school. In those moments, he prefers to ignore the looks and instead wrap an arm around Reo’s waist to tug him closer.

My reputation level must be in shambles…

They’ve yet to hold hands, though. This is partly due to the fact that Nagi’s hands are often busy (read: tapping away at his phone or in his pockets), and partly due to the fact that Reo’s hands are often busy (which is Nagi’s fault as well, most of the time). The act slips Nagi’s mind until he and Reo have parted ways for the day. He’ll keep the idea in the back of his mind until they meet at lunch, only for his thoughts to completely disappear when he sees Reo smile at him from across the hall and practically skip over to Nagi, already rambling about his day or his newest idea for a play. Whenever Reo is around, Nagi feels as though he doesn’t have to think at all. It’s comforting.

Nagi can only wait for so long. Before leaving his apartment this morning, he had used a half-dead sharpie to write the word “hand” messily on his thumb. He can’t possibly forget if the word is right in front of his face. Reo, who had been waiting outside the limousine, gave him a questioning look at the mark, but didn’t say anything. The handwriting is illegible, so Reo likely couldn’t even make out the memo.

Now, they’re being dropped off at the high school as Ba-ya bids farewell to the two of them. Nagi looks down at his hand again. Hand. There are plenty of students outside the entrance of the school, either talking with each other or entering the front doors. The situation meets the criteria to initiate a display of affection. A new action is available… yay.

Reo is explaining some complicated economic system as the limousine behind them pulls away. Reo is so pretty when he talks about something he’s passionate about, all wide-eyed and animated. He’s waving a hand through the air in a vague gesture when Nagi reaches out and grabs it with his own.

The explanation cuts off mid-sentence as Reo stills beneath his touch. Their hands hang a bit awkwardly in the air, positioned as if Nagi is helping Reo off of a carriage. The dating simulators and shojo manga never showed him what happens in between the panels… 2D images can only portray so much motion. Nagi does the only thing he can think of in the stilted awkwardness of the situation: he stares at Reo until something happens.

Reo snaps his mouth shut and looks between Nagi and their hands for a moment before his face turns a furious shade of red. Oh. He’s so cute. Nagi should have tried this earlier. He’s not sure why Reo is so surprised, though. They’ve been in this pretend relationship for a week now. Sure, he blushes a bit whenever Nagi slings a lazy arm around his waist or whenever he buries his head in Reo’s hair, but never this much.

Eh, thinking about it is a pain. What isn’t a pain is the way Reo smiles, slowly and timidly, before lowering their clasped hands. After taking a wavering breath, he pulls them into the school. He’s still gesturing as he resumes his earlier topic with his free hand. With each step they take into the school, Reo’s shoulders relax until he’s completely at ease, as though holding Nagi’s hand is as natural as breathing.

Reo’s hands are cool to the touch and smooth against his own. His fingers are long and delicate as they curl against Nagi’s own calloused ones. Listening to Reo talk as they walk through the halls, connected through their interlocked hands, is a sensation Nagi never would have envisioned months ago when he was alone. With Reo, there’s never a moment where he feels alone, even when they’re apart. He’s reminded of Reo through every mauve flower he passes on the road, through the sun’s warmth on his skin as it cascades through his apartment window, through the cleats which match Reo’s own that sit by the doorway. He can no longer remember what life was like without Reo, and he doesn’t want to.

Reo is amazing and beautiful and perfectly imperfect, and Nagi wants nothing more than to be able to hold his hand forever.

It’s not until Reo lets go of Nagi’s hand, fingers lingering hesitantly in the touch as though he doesn’t want to leave, and his warmth dissipates as he walks away to attend his own class, that Nagi realizes:

I want to date him for real.

Ah. Cringe.

-x-

They fall into a steady routine after that.

Every morning, Reo picks Nagi up from his apartment, either by limousine or bike. On biking days, Nagi has to wake up earlier, but it gives him an excuse to cling to Reo for a solid half hour with a cool breeze against his face, so it’s not all bad. Nagi will take Reo’s hand before they head into the school building, and Reo will talk about whatever is on his mind that morning as Nagi tries to stay awake to the sound of Reo’s energetic voice. After they reach Nagi’s classroom, Reo will squeeze his hand and hug him goodbye before heading off to his own class.

At lunch, Reo brings a second meal for Nagi. It doesn’t entirely have to do with their arrangement, Nagi often either forgets to pack anything or doesn’t have the energy to do so. Most of the time, they eat in the stairwell together with nothing but Reo’s words bouncing off of the mostly empty hallway to accompany them. Nagi will lean into Reo’s shoulder and doze off with the other’s hand smoothing his hair down. This doesn’t feel entirely fake, either.

At the end of the day, Nagi will find Reo at the boy’s locker and Reo will greet him by practically throwing himself at Nagi, exclaiming a quick I missed you, my treasure! before pulling away with a wide grin and unabashed glee written in every inch of his face.

Nagi is beginning to forget that it’s fake.

The glares from their classmates do not lessen up over time, they only increase. But no one has pulled a knife on Nagi or tried to make him disappear under mysterious circumstances yet, so it doesn’t really matter. People have stopped trying to confess their shallow love for Reo at every opportunity, and that’s all that really matters. Reo consistently thanks Nagi, showering him in praise and gifts at every turn. Nagi has given up on trying to assure his best friend that it isn’t a big deal and they’re essentially just acting as they always do with an extra step or two. When Mikage Reo is passionate about something, it’s not easy to deter him.

It’s one of those mornings where Nagi is running on two hours of sleep after grinding out a ranked session on one of his first person shooters all night. He’d fallen asleep the moment he sat down in the limousine, dead to the world until Reo had to practically drag him out like a corpse. Nagi numbly registers the thought that he should have stayed home that day as he blindly grabs Reo's hand. He misses it a few times until Reo lets out a soft laugh and links their finger together, tugging him along to the entrance.

It’s a slow walk. Nagi refuses to go any faster on such little sleep and he nearly stumbles into a few walls as his eyes drift shut every few seconds. He’s barely conscious when he and Reo arrive at Nagi’s classroom. He’s staring at Reo through heavy lidded eyes and thinking that this must be a dream. How else could he be holding hands with the prettiest boy in the school? Reo, with his delicate hands and soft laugh and tender eyes. The purple of his hair is almost dreamlike as it shines in the morning sunlight that filters through the windows of the hallway. He’s illuminated like an angel in the soft yellow glow. Reo, Reo, Reo. Pretty, pretty Reo.

“Nagi?”

A hand is snapping in his face. A neatly manicured hand, Reo’s hand. Nagi blinks. Right, he needs to hug his beautiful boyfriend goodbye.

“Reo…” he mumbles sleepily, reaching forward a bit blindly. Reo laughs quietly in response and closes the distance, wrapping his arms around Nagi’s neck while his own find their way around Reo’s waist. Reo’s hair is soft against his face, and the space between Reo’s shoulder and neck is a perfect fit for Nagi’s face, like he’s always been meant to fit against Reo. He could fall asleep standing up like this, but Reo is already trying to pull away. Unfortunate.

“Come on, Nagi,” Reo chuckles into his ear when Nagi makes no move to let him go. There’s fond amusement rather than any real urgency in his tone.

Nagi sighs and pouts against Reo’s neck. Why do they have to go to school? If they didn’t have to go to school, they could just stay like this forever and Nagi could sleep as long as he pleased. They could spend their mornings cuddling in bed until the sun has long since risen. They could go on dates to an arcade and Nagi could win Reo a cool plushie instead of studying for upcoming exams.

Reluctantly, Nagi loosens his grip around Reo. Before the other boy can pull away, though, Nagi turns his head up a bit to brush his lips against Reo’s cheek.

Reo stiffens. It’s like Nagi paused the game entirely, because Reo doesn’t move an inch. Nagi leans back a bit to look at him fully, hands still loosely on his hips. Under the harsh sunlight, his face flushes a deep red as he blinks at Nagi with a dumbfounded expression. Nagi frowns. Did he do something wrong? They’re dating, or, well, pretending to be, but he couldn’t really care less about the difference at the moment.

“...Eh? Reo?”

Another slow blink before Reo snaps back into reality at Nagi’s voice. Hurriedly, he steps out of Nagi’s lingering grasp and gives him a shaky smile with an even shakier wave.

“I-I’ll see you later, Nagi! Don’t fall asleep for the whole day, alright?” Reo leaves without waiting for a response, purple hair swaying swiftly with the hasty movement.

Once Reo has long since left his line of sight, Nagi stumbles in his classroom, rubbing at his eyes in a daze. The moment he sits at his desk, his head is immediately pressed against the cool surface and his eyes are drifting shut. With no pretty boy in front of him, there’s nothing to be awake for. He dreams of violet eyes crinkling with laughter and slender hands on his own.

-x-

Nagi slept the whole day.

During their lunch period, Reo tries to feed him a few bites of food, going on about how needs to eat and stay hydrated in order to have energy for their practice later, but Nagi can only manage a few bites before he slumps against Reo’s shoulder. Reo sighs contentedly and wraps an arm behind Nagi to massage the back of his head. This is nice, Nagi thinks, wrapping his arms around Reo’s middle like he’s an oversized pillow, this is really nice.

After their classes are finished for the day, Nagi leans against the locker next to Reo’s as he always does. He tilts his head against the cool steel and blinks slowly as Reo organizes his notes from the day. He’s still exhausted, considering that school desks don’t make for proper sleeping material. He’s already plotting how to escape practice when Reo rises to his feet and shuts the locker.

Reo glances at him, then back at the locker in front of him. His eyebrows are slightly furrowed and one of his hands is messing with the strap of his backpack. “You don’t have to come to practice today, Nagi, I’ll ask Ba-ya to take you home.”

“...Eh?” Nagi mumbles after a moment of processing the words. That was easy. Still, Reo seems nervous about something, and allowing Nagi to skip out on practice is out of character for him. Reo knows Nagi will do anything he asks, even if it does require some extra prodding. “Are you okay?”

Reo hesitates before turning to face him, but he looks at a point past Nagi rather than at him. His hands are still fidgeting. “Yeah, I’m fine. I just know I won’t get anything out of you when you’re running on two hours of sleep. I’d rather you not collapse on the field from exhaustion.”

“Okay.”

They stand in silence, Reo’s brow furrowing in thought as he stares blankly behind Nagi while Nagi stares at Reo patiently. No practice for him. He can sleep for as long as he wants after he waters Choki… Or maybe he’ll try to rank up in Splatoon. No, sleep sounds much better than the nightmare of ranked games right now.

Reo sucks in a breath, then meets Nagi’s waiting gaze with his shoulders back, as though bracing himself. Nagi shakes himself back into awareness and tilts his head, waiting.

“I have to go set up the field, but I already texted Ba-ya, so she should be waiting in the usual spot. Do you need me to carry you?”

Nagi doesn’t need Reo to carry him, but he is nothing if not selfish, especially when Reo’s attention is in consideration, so he nods and sticks out his arms, waiting. Reo obliges after handing Nagi his backpack, bending down and grabbing onto the back of Nagi’s thighs to hoist him up. Reo limousine. Yippee.

He thinks of this morning, with Reo’s hair against his skin and his face buried in Reo’s shoulder. How Reo had reacted to the kiss. That was cute. Nagi wants to do it again. Hopefully Reo doesn’t freeze up again and drop him on the ground. That would hurt.

Nuzzling his nose behind Reo’s ear to push the hair away, Nagi plants a faint kiss against the newly exposed skin. Reo’s grip tightens and his pace picks up as they approach the entrance. He can’t see Reo’s expression from where he’s positioned against his best friend’s back, but he hopes it's the same as this morning. Pink and pretty.

They reach the limousine all too soon, and Reo is setting Nagi down and taking his bag back and Nagi is frowning at the loss of contact. Well, soon enough he’ll be in bed with the warmth of the evening sun beating through his window, so it’s not so bad. Still, he wishes Reo would come home with him. He is the captain of the team, though, and soccer means a lot to Reo. Nagi can’t be so selfish as to take that away from him.

Reo clears his throat. “I’ll text you later, Nagi.” With a smile, he adds, “Don’t think you can skip out tomorrow, though. You better get proper sleep tonight.”

“Yeah, yeah…” Nagi mumbles, already leaning in to wrap his arms around Reo for their usual farewell. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get tired of holding Reo. If he closes his eyes and drowns out the noise of cars and students, he can almost pretend that they’re just two boyfriends about to part ways after a dinner date at a quaint ramen shop. The illusion is shattered as Reo begins to pull away.

He doesn’t pull back fully, though. Instead, he leans his head back, hesitating briefly before pressing a kiss against Nagi’s cheek.

Oh.

Nagi immediately takes note of two things:

One, Reo’s lips are smooth.

And two, Nagi’s face is burning. He might be dying. That’s fine. This is probably the best way to go.

His brain is still processing the action as Reo steps out of his arms, looking a mix of both sheepish and proud at the corpse-like state he has reduced Nagi to. Reo’s own cheeks are dusted in a light pink, his lips slightly parted in a pleased smile, and his hair framing his round face as it shifts through the breeze.

Nagi.exe has stopped functioning. Please try restarting the program or sending a note through the troubleshooter.

“See you later, Nagi!” Reo says with a grin as he turns to make his way toward the locker room. Nagi doesn’t get the chance to return the farewell, instead staring dumbly long after Reo has disappeared. Only when Ba-ya lightly honks the horn of the car does he regain any sense of functioning.

He shuffles his way awkwardly into the limousine. Through the rearview mirror, Ba-ya meets his gaze with a knowing glint in her eyes. Nagi quickly shifts to look out the window instead.

His mind is a slideshow of that moment. It’s the only thought playing in his head as he unlocks his apartment and steps inside. Reo’s arms around him, the light touch of his lips against Nagi’s skin, the earnestly smug look on his face as he stepped away as though he got exactly what he wanted like he always does. Nagi is starting to suspect that Reo is the real sun rather than the blinding sphere in the sky. It feels as though his world revolves solely around Reo, the brightest spot in his life.

Nagi collapses onto his bed unceremoniously. He reaches out a hand toward where Choki sits on the window sill and pricks his hand against one of the spikes. Already awake, it seems. Flopping onto his back, Nagi stares at the ceiling.

“Choki,” he tells the cactus, voice distant, “I’m really in it now…”

-x-

Fading sunlight of the evening filters in through the crack of Nagi’s curtains, coating the one room apartment in a soft orange glow. Reo sits at the desk, pen in hand as he scrawls over a notebook that’s lying on top of a mountain of textbooks. There’s an assortment of multi-colored pens to his right, and a half-finished bottle of ramune to his left. Reo has a tendency to hunch over his work when he’s deeply focused on something, and now is no different as he tilts his head over the notebook, purple hair swinging around his face before he lifts a hand to push it behind an ear to reveal his expression. Brows furrowed in concentration, tongue occasionally darting out to lick his lips, Reo is the picture of a perfect student.

Nagi, for his part, is lying in his unmade bed on his phone, tapping away at a shooter game. He’s not really paying attention, though, and soon enough, he’s faced with a GAME OVER screen. He’s not looking at the red text. Instead, his attention is locked solely on the pretty boy that sits a short distance away.

Reo taps a pen against his mouth in contemplation. Nagi thinks he is going to die if he doesn’t kiss him within the next ten seconds.

Groggily, Nagi pushes himself to an upright position. He’s tired. He gave up on studying about five minutes after Reo started and flopped onto the bed instead, muttering something about passing regardless. Now, he rises to his feet and takes a couple of steps over to the chair Reo occupies. Reo’s concentration doesn’t break until Nagi slings his arms around the other’s shoulders and presses their cheeks together. It’s an awkward position, but one made worth the discomfort when Reo raises a hand to Nagi’s hair, fluffing it fondly.

Without turning to look at him or placing down the pen in his opposite hand, Reo chuckles softly. “Are you planning on studying now? You can have the chair, if you want.”

Nagi mumbles something incoherent and buries face further into Reo’s shoulder. Why would Nagi want to study when he can cling to Reo like a koala instead?

“What was that, Nagi?” Reo is still focused on the notes in front of him, scrawling something in a blue pen. What do the statistics notes have that I don’t, Reo…

Ah, right, he’s a man on a mission. Current quest: kiss the prettiest boy he’s ever met.

“Reo…”

“Yeah?”

Nagi lifts his head, blinking sleepily. Reo’s hand is still sifting through his hair, but his eyes remain ever-focused.

“Why won’t you look at me…” he pouts. It’s definitely pathetic, but Nagi has never claimed not to be.

Reo laughs. His side profile is so beautiful, especially with his hair tucked behind his ear. Nagi could count every eyelash from this distance. He can see the way Reo’s eyes move from word to word on the page below, the way his eyebrows are creased ever so slightly. “I’m busy, Nagi. If you have something to show me, I’ll be done soon.”

Soon is not soon enough, Nagi decides. He leans in, pressing his lips against Reo’s cheek for a few seconds before leisurely pulling back to greedily drink up the reaction he knows he’ll receive.

And receive it he does. Reo is looking at him now with wide eyes and a parted mouth and red cheeks. Why is Reo always so surprised whenever Nagi shows him affection? It’s adorable, but he would expect Reo to be used to it with how freely he gives it return. Maybe no one’s ever kissed Reo’s face before. That won’t do, so Nagi leans over to kiss the other side of his face.

The way Reo’s jaw falls open is comical. Ah, he’s so cute.

“Reo?” Nagi mumbles after a long moment passes of Reo’s face turning an increasingly, now concerning, color. “Are you breathing?”

The answer comes in a heavy breath against Nagi’s face. Apparently, no. Nagi is opening his mouth, unsure if he should apologize or what he would even say, until he sees Reo’s expression soften. Wide eyes shift into a gentle look with the brightness of the stars, pink lips close into a smile that holds the warmth of the sun, and his head tilts slightly, a few stray lilac strands falling over his face.

Nagi thinks he might stop breathing, too.

“Yeah, Nagi,” Reo says, and he says the name like it's a treasure to be revered. “You have my attention now. Need anything?”

“Yeah,” Nagi echoes. “You.”

Oh. Cringe. Dating simulators made talking easier when he could pick from pre-made dialogue that was already corny. He only has his empty brain to thank for the words that slip out of his mouth now.

Reo smiles, looking away. There’s an unreadable look in his eyes, but it's gone when he looks back. “We can go get dinner in a bit, just let me finish copying this page, alright?”

Nagi sighs, yet he relents all the same. “Fine,” he says, pulling back to plant himself back on the bed behind him. “Wake me up when you’re done…”

After shuffling back into what Reo dubs his ‘zombie-position’, he closes his eyes. There’s no sound in the apartment but the scratch of Reo’s pen against paper and the occasional click of a pen cap. That wasn’t fake. There’s no one around to fool, no one to impress. Nagi kissed Reo because he wanted to, and Reo accepted it. Their pretend relationship has slowly shifted into something real.

Does that mean they’re going on a dinner date later? Nagi’s heart lightly picks up from its slow beat. Reo makes him feel too many things. Figuring out emotions is a pain, so instead of worrying about the state of their relationship, he turns his head into his pillow and drifts off to sleep.

-x-

Nagi is beginning to realize that his relationship with Reo has always been strange when compared to what constitutes a ‘normal’ friendship.

The two have always been physically affectionate with each other. It started with Reo throwing his arm around Nagi in that stairwell, and then whenever he wanted to drag Nagi somewhere or trap him against his will. It continued into their behavior on the field, where Reo would jump on Nagi’s back for scoring a goal or fluff his hair after a particularly good game. Over time, Nagi found himself slumping against Reo when he was tired, or throwing himself onto Reo’s back for a piggyback ride when he couldn’t be bothered to move his legs. On rare occasions, Reo would throw himself on Nagi and reverse the roles.

Reo has always showered Nagi in gifts, from new cleats and laces to absurdly expensive video game consoles to groceries on the days Nagi couldn’t bring himself to go out. He’s always taken care of Nagi more than his own parents ever have. When Nagi doesn’t have the motivation to leave his bed, Reo is there to bring him easily consumable food. When Nagi forgets to take care of his hair, Reo is there to run a hand and dry shampoo through it. When Nagi is too exhausted to move after practice, Reo is there to carry him home. Reo is always there at Nagi’s worst. Reo is always there.

Ever since they began faking a relationship, not much changed. Reo still fed Nagi at lunch, Nagi still leaned into Reo’s touch, Reo still pampered Nagi off the field. They still hung out at Nagi’s apartment after practice or went out to arcades over the weekend if they were both free. The only added steps were hugging (which they had practically already been doing halfway) and handholding. Nagi is not too familiar with shojo manga, but he has a feeling that there’s normally more of a gap between friendship and a romantic relationship.

They’re dating for real now. Probably. After Reo had finished studying that night, he woke Nagi up for dinner with a kiss to the forehead. Before they parted ways for the day, they’d embraced in the privacy of Nagi’s apartment. Nagi could hear the digital high-pitched noise of a relationship bar increasing in his head.

Reo is his best friend and his boyfriend. The thought makes Nagi’s heart flutter. Or maybe the jelly drink he had that morning had expired and he was experiencing food poisoning.

A few weeks go by. Nothing changes in that time, aside from the newly obtained action to kiss Reo’s face whenever and wherever he pleases. Nagi never tires of the look Reo gives him every time he pulls away from kissing his cheek or nose or ear. Sometimes, it follows him into his daydreams. Reo returns to the display just as often. He hasn’t told Reo, but during football games, he’ll motivate himself with the possibility of Reo kissing his cheek in joy after winning. It’s like an award for a quest. Mission: win the game. Reward: affection from the prettiest boy in the world.

Huh, Nagi muses, his head on Reo’s lap while they’re sitting in Nagi’s bed, it’s almost been a month since we started dating for real…

He wonders if Reo is the type for ostentatious and frequent anniversary celebrations. Nagi wouldn’t mind either way, so long as he can continue to spend time with Reo.

The boy in question is running a hand through Nagi’s hair absentmindedly as he stares at a spot on the floor beneath where his legs dangle off of the bed. Reo’s hair is down, and it falls like a mini waterfall around his face. His eyebrows are ever so slightly drawn together in thought. Some days, Reo will share his every thought with Nagi in a long winded ramble. Others, like today, he’ll be quietly contemplative. Nagi doesn’t mind the silence, but it’s not always a good thing when it comes to Reo. He knows Reo has a poor relationship with his parents and is constantly forced to carry unreasonable expectations of perfection throughout his life. But Nagi is new to relationships. He doesn’t know what the signs of despair are, or how to comfort someone, or how to reach out and extend help. So, he does what he knows and stays by Reo’s side.

He hopes it’s enough for now.

Reo becomes a blur of purple as Nagi’s eyes drift closed. A few moments pass while Nagi sits between conscious and not, until Reo’s hand stills and he speaks.

“Hey, Nagi,” Reo says, voice wavering imperceptibly. “I… need to tell you something.”

That’s strange. Reo is the type of person to get right to the point. He must be nervous about whatever it is. Nagi cracks open an eye and hums, indicating to Reo that he’s listening.

Reo inhales a shaky breath before meeting Nagi’s gaze. “I… like you. For real.”

Oh. That’s all? Nagi closes his eye. “I like you too, Reo.”

Silence. Even the air conditioning unit is quiet for a moment.

Then, quietly: “Huh?”

Nagi isn’t a fan of repeating himself. It’s a pain. But, Reo isn’t, so he says, “I like you too.”

The hand is no longer in Nagi’s hair. He frowns at the loss of contact and opens his eyes to voice his complaints directly to Reo, only to find that Reo has covered his face in embarrassment.

“Reo?”

“Damn, Nagi…” Reo mutters. “You can’t just say something like that so casually.”

“Huh? We’ve been dating for, like, a month. I thought you knew already.”

Reo lifts his head at that, hands hanging uselessly in the air and jaw comically dropped as he stares down at Nagi. Nagi blinks slowly in response.

“What do you mean ‘we’ve been dating for a month’,” Reo says slowly, expression growing more incredulous with each word. “We’ve been pretending to date for almost two.”

Now it’s Nagi’s turn to be confused. He rubs blearily at his eyes, otherwise unmoving in Reo’s lap. “What? I thought we started dating for real, though…”

“Why would you think that?” Reo cries, voice growing frantic. His face is red again. Cute.

Nagi grabs one of Reo’s hands and clasps it between his own on his chest. Reo doesn’t protest the action, but he does suck in a breath. “We’ve been doing couple stuff in private for a while now. Why would I kiss your face and hold your hand in private if I only cared about faking it for other people?”

“You…” Reo stares at him, astonished. Then, his expression shifts into relief as he laughs, loud and amused. “You’re a real treasure, Nagi. You mean you thought we were dating this whole time?”

“Yeah.” Nagi’s still pretty sure they were.

“You’re an idiot.” It’s said with no bite and all fondness.

“I think you’re the idiot, Reo…”

“Shut up,” Reo laughs. “Fine, how about we’re both idiots, then?”

Nagi hums. “We’re idiots together.”

“Yeah, Nagi,” Reo says with a wistful smile. He brings his other hand to Nagi’s hair again, ruffling it affectionately. “We are.”

Nagi’s eyes drift shut. The silence that falls between them is much more comfortable. Reo’s hand is gentle in his hair rather than jittery in nervousness. The last bit of sunlight is fading away for the evening, but Nagi still feels the warmth of it in the boy beside him.

Before he can be fully lost to the realm of sleep, Reo speaks up again. “So, what, you thought we were dating because we kissed each other on the cheek?”

A yawn escapes him before he responds. “Yeah… What about it?” He doesn’t point out that Reo also kissed him on the nose and forehead, nor that he kissed Reo on the jaw and behind his ear.

He can feel the smugness radiating from Reo’s voice when he says, “How about a real kiss, then?”

Oh, would you look at that. Nagi is wide awake.

Reo is so pretty when he laughs, even when it’s at Nagi’s expense. The way his face scrunches up, his mouth stretches into an open smile, and the way he’ll bring a fist to his face as if to muffle the sound. If Nagi could only listen to one thing the rest of his life, it’d probably be Reo’s laugh. Or maybe the Minecraft theme… Hard choice.

“Is that a yes, then?” Reo asks, amused like he already knows the answer.

Nagi is nodding along with more vigor than he normally has, and Reo is shifting and leaning downward to angle his lips toward Nagi’s.

Reo’s lips are plush and smooth against his own. Hair is tickling at Nagi’s eyelids and nose as it cascades downward from where Reo is angled over him, but he doesn’t mind. It’s like he’s living and breathing Reo, in that moment. Maybe Reo is living and breathing him in, too. It’s just a gentle press of their lips together for just a few seconds, and Reo is pulling away all too soon.

Reo gives him a small, content smile. The hand that Nagi holds between his own is brushing a careful thumb against his skin as Reo’s other hand runs in smooth circles throughout his hair. Reo shows love in every aspect of life: through touch, through words, through gifts, through actions. Reo loves so passionately and genuinely that Nagi is almost drowning in it, but maybe death by drowning isn’t a bad way to go if it’s in Reo’s embrace.

“So, uh…” Nagi starts, looking up at Reo with wide gray eyes. “Are we dating for real now?”

There’s a laugh and a hand smothering Nagi’s face. Between Reo’s fingers, Nagi sees his smile widen adoringly.

“Yeah, Nagi. We’re dating for real.”