Chapter Text
The view outside of the train window was dark and vast. If he didn't think about it too much then he could've imagined it was infinite. Sans had spent the whole train journey so far simply staring through it, trying to rest his mind some.
Unfortunately, it was beginning to make him feel a bit queasy so he turned his gaze to the train interior.
The seats were a plastic red, still a garish colour despite how old and scratched they were. Sans couldn't find it in himself to mind the colour though since it reminded him of his brother’s scarf. Stark artificial lighting ran down the length of the train that hurt his eyes after a while since it was so different from the magical lighting in the underground.
He looked down to his feet, propped up against the dirty brown floor. He was too short to plant them firmly and sit back.
At least he had a seat this time, he reasoned, last time he’d fallen flat on his tailbone when the train rocked.
There was a cry from the other end of the train carriage before it was quickly shushed and Sans twitched, feeling their gaze on his upturned hood.
He soon went back to gazing absentmindedly at the floor, trying to think of a good pun to tell to a small crowd of terrified humans.
His thoughts soon drifted though as he became hyper aware of one human in particular, a young woman holding an even younger child to her side and sending him fretful glances. She looked like a nervous wreck.
Nervous wreck.. he could make a pun out of nervous wreck, right? Something about an accident- no, no that’s too brutal. Maybe like a ship wreck?
Sudden noise sounded over the intercom, some garbled man speaking about the next stop so Sans stood up in preparation. A shriek came from one of the dozen humans.
At the end of his tether, Sans turned to them.
“Hey,” He called out, “Why did the train not wanna get into any accidents?”
The silence was predictable and as the train swayed to a slow stop, if Sans had a stomach it would've dropped.
“Cause he was a nervous wreck.” He snickered as the doors finally opened, making eye-contact with a giggling child in a sea of horrified humans as he cheerfully hopped off the train to a stunned silence.
-----
After that it was only a bus journey home.
The long-suffering bus driver couldn't have cared less about things humerus, so Sans decided to save it for a better audience. With the grim look he’d received after telling his Columbus joke he wouldn't be surprised if he’d be thrown off the bus.
He sat down on an empty seat, hood still pulled up and a scarf wrapped firmly around his jaw. His mind wandered back to the circumstances and toyed with the idea of taking a nap.
After Frisk had set them free, monsters had spilled out of the mountain and into the humans lands. The humans had not been as welcoming as expected.
Most of the monsters had retreated after one of them had been killed. Their hopes had dimmed after the loss of one of their own and the unrelenting hatred of the humans. Asgore had travelled a long way to speak with the human leader while Toriel held down the fort at the mountain, refusing to retreat back into the mountain at the humans insistence.
As far as Sans knew, Toriel was already organising efforts for a temporary settlement to be built at the base of the mountain for any monsters that wanted to come to the human world but it was dangerous.
If the humans decided to come at them with full force, they’d have no chance.
Of course, the vast majority of humans didn’t even know they existed so they were pretty safe for now, hiding in the dense forests far away from the city.
Papyrus, however, had no fear over the humans.
Brother, he’d pleaded earnestly, can we go to the big cities like the ones Frisk has described to me!
Then Papyrus had used the puppy dog eyes when he knew that Sans couldn’t resist them so it had been up to him to find a way to get them there.
He was pulled out of his musing as the dark streets outside the window became more and more familiar. He stood up on aching bones and pushed the bell.
---
A short walk down pitch black streets and four flights of stairs later, Sans was unlocking the door to their flat with a relieved sigh and a wider grin.
“Sans!” Papyrus called out gleefully from the kitchen, “How was your da- AH!”
He was swiftly interrupted by a large bang and the clattering of pots and pans cascading to the floor. There was another loud yell but Sans just snorted and slipped his scarf from around his neck, letting the door slam shut behind him.
“Try not to wreck the apartment bro, inspections next week.”
“It wasn’t me-” Another clang, sounded like a frying pan, “It was the-!”
And that was all the warning he got before three and a half feet of tiny human crashed into his middle.
“Sans!” They screeched out as they both fell backwards onto the floor, Frisk ending up sitting right on his ribs.
“Heya kiddo,” He started then let out a pained noise as Frisk started bouncing up and down in excitement, grinning madly, “Geez, watch the ribs. What’s Tori been feeding you?”
“I don’t know what her Majesty has been feeding them most of the time but from the amount of pie the human has brought with them..” Papyrus called from the kitchen.
Papyrus poked his head around the divide between the kitchen and the main room and grinned down at the sight, “I believe the human has eaten a great many pies since we have last seen them! Look how much they have grown!”
Frisk laughed and shook their head, patting their stomach with two hands. They pointed to the kitchen and replied, “Haven’t eaten many. More in there than eaten.”
The tall skeleton nodded thoughtfully and while Frisk was distracted, Sans took the time to disappear from underneath them and reappeared next to them.
Frisk blinked in confusion but took the hand Sans offered to them and was pulled to their feet.
“Well then, human!” Papyrus bellowed, “I’ll simply have to make you some of my glorious spaghetti to encourage your appetite!”
“Yeah,” Sans added in a whisper, “Don’t worry kid, we’ll help out this time incase Master Chef over here gets too creative.”
Papyrus didn’t notice and continued his babbling, “If you eat nothing but pie then you might end up as short as Sans and that simply won’t do!” He marched off into the kitchen, flapping his hands and apron strings flapping valiantly in the wind behind him.
“Heh, but don’t you know what they say about short skeletons?”
“SANS, you can’t say that in front of the small humans!”
“Eh, just kiddin’.”
---
An hour later and the three of them were bunched up together on their two-seater couch with Frisk in the middle, a skeleton on either end and a steaming plate of spaghetti in each of their laps. Their battered television was blaring away but it was mostly background noise to them.
It turns out that Toriel has sent Frisk down to stay with them for a while after they’d pestered her so much about it.
Papyrus had been more than overjoyed to answer a knock to his door and find Frisk kicking at the dirty carpeted floor of the hallway with their shoes. Greater Dog had loomed behind them, making happy little barks. The dog had handed them a note from Toriel explaining the situation before bounding off down the hallway and nearly crashing into another resident just leaving their own apartment.
Frisk hadn’t said much about it but while Papyrus’ back had been turned, had given Sans a meaningful look and slipped him a sealed envelope.
Back in the present, they talked about Toriel’s latest project instead as they devoured their own plates of a surprisingly decent meal.
“So her Majesty is building a school then?” Papyrus gasped into his gloved hands, looking over at Sans as Frisk nodded cautiously.
“Sans, do you think I could- ”
“Bro, no.” Sans laughed, eyes locked onto the television screen despite his brother’s pleading gaze.
“But I believe I could be an excellent teacher! Those young ones would surely flourish under the tutorage of the Great Papyrus!” He held a gloved hand to his chest and if the taller brother had hair, it would’ve been flowing behind him in the breeze like he was a movie hero.
Sans ate a meatball and sighed. He turned his head so he could grin up at his brother.
“If you wanna go be a teacher then I won’t stop you. If you’re this good with Frisk then I’m sure you’d be fine with a couple more sproglets running around your ankles.”
Papyrus puffed out his chest at the praise and Frisk giggled into their hands.
“Buuuuut,” Sans drew out the word, regretting his next words already, “You need to think a bit more about it. How are you going to get there everyday? ‘Cause I don’t mind moving back to live with the others, hell, we’ll see more of the pipsqueak over here if we do..”
Frisk looked down at their plate, making swirls in the long pasta with their fork before stabbing a meatball with determination. Papyrus slumped for a moment but after a few beats of silence perked straight up again.
“Wait a moment! How did the human get here if the distance is so far to travel?” Papyrus looked down at Frisk expectantly.
The young human shrugged and simply replied, “Piggyback.”
Papyrus lifted a gloved hand to his mandible and thought for a moment, “I could- ”
“No you couldn’t,” Sans shook his head, prodding at a leftover meatball with his fork. He heard mumbling coming from beside him and flicked the meatball onto Frisk’s plate without hesitation.
“You’re right,” Papyrus sighed, gazing down at his empty plate, “It wouldn’t be all that fair to the Greater Dog would it?”
“Ahh, cheer up bro,” Sans leaned forward to grab Frisk’s plate, pleased to see it was empty, and stacked it on top of his own. He dumped them both on the coffee table without a thought and then laid back lazily.
“Could teach humans?” Frisk suggested, scooting backwards now that they were free of their plate and curling up against Papyrus.
Papyrus perked back up again and Frisk sent Sans an alarmed look. Sans just shrugged in response and winked, too used to his own brother’s eccentric behaviour by now.
“That’s it, Sans! I could teach the humans!” Papyrus squinted at the television, “Maybe I could teach others my vast culinary experience! It must simply be shared with the world as Undyne tutored me as a young skeleton..”
The taller skeleton lept up with enthusiasm, nearly spilling his plate and Frisk onto the floor were it not for his shorter brother grabbing both with blue magic.
“I need to contact Undyne,” He cried out with his arm flung into the air, “Immediately!”
Papyrus ran into the kitchen without further fanfare except for Frisk’s high-pitched laughter.
Sans sunk backwards into their ratty couch even more, eyes closed and looking on the verge of taking a nap.
“Sans?” Frisk nudged his shoulder with the side of their head until the short skeleton lifted up his arm and let them bury underneath it.
“What’s up, kiddo?” The small child shivered slightly and Sans opened one eye to peer down at them. “You cold or somethin’?”
They nodded rapidly, burrowing into his jacket even more. Sans sighed.
“I’ll get you a jumper or somethin’ in a bit.” He didn’t want to say anything more about it. He would’ve loved to tell them that he’d put the heating on but there was no way they could afford it with their rent looming over them.
They sat there for a while, Frisk leeching warmth from the short skeleton while they listened to Papyrus’ excited chatter over the phone, asking for recipes and such.
Sans was pleasantly snoozing away, content with a full stomach though he was distantly aware that if he didn’t stop Papyrus now then he’d probably get really carried away with this idea. He drifted in between thinking up a solution and being lured into a slice of that pie in the kitchen before he was rudely interrupted by ice cold fingers patting his cheek.
“Whuh?” Sans blinked his eyes open despite the weight of them, to the sight of Frisk frowning over him.
“Why so...” Frisk started to ask, but the words got jumbled up in their head again so they just motioned to his face.
“Why am I so what? Why am I so awesome?” Sans grinned back at them in a teasing manner, fully aware they were referring to his dreadful appearance.
Frisk sighed and pulled at their own eyes. They let go and frowned at him again, although this time it looked more like a pout.
“Tired? Sick?” They asked, in an unimpressed tone.
Sans shifted uncomfortably, “Y’know what I’m like, kid. I gotta actually do work, now. It’s draining my energy.” He closed one eye and shrugged it off like usual, “I’ll get used to it.”
Frisk opened their mouth to say more but Papyrus chose that moment to interrupt with a yell of his brother’s name.
“What’s up, bro?” Sans called back, relief audible in his voice. Frisk narrowed their eyes.
“You still haven’t done the dishes while I was speaking on the phone! We had a deal, brother! I cook and you wash-up, lazybones!”
“Okay, fine, I’m moving.” Sans shifted himself but Frisk jabbed a finger right into his sternum.
“Not. Over.” They grumbled and then sat back to let the skeleton pass.
Sans got up without hesitation this time, gathering the plates into a pile with a flick of his wrist and retreated to the kitchen.
“Geez, kid’s turning out more like Tori everyday,” He muttered to himself.