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Jean was leaning over him. And Jeremy couldn't look.
The mattress dipped as he shifted his weight and Jeremy fought to steady his breathing, feeling the pressing heat of Jean's body so close to him. Or perhaps that was just the product of his nerves and racing heart.
On the back of Jean's unwavering proximity was his gentle accusation. Jeremy couldn't let him believe it. Not when Jean was so close and would be able to pick apart his lies like he was untangling threads.
At last Jeremy found his words. "No. Not to you." The Frenchman looked unconvinced though he continued to listen to Jeremy with a sharp intensity. Jeremy held his stare and willed Jean to believe him. "I told you all summer I want you to trust me and feel safe with me, didn't I? Lying to you would undo everything we've worked so hard to build. I'd rather lose face than lose your confidence."
Jeremy expected it to be enough for Jean to retreat from his space. Instead, he leaned closer, and Jeremy felt his heart pick up double time. He was certain Jean could hear it drumming against his chest. Maybe he was leaning in closer because he thought Jeremy was about to explode. He couldn't know he was the cause.
Jeremy felt the mattress dip again but this time between his legs. Gingerly he sneaked a peek from below his arm, his eyes cast downwards to where Jean's knee was now pressing into the bed. Jeremy gulped and shut his eyes again, he could feel his pulse hammering under his skin when Jean reached for his arm tugging it down and off his face.
Jeremy didn't resist as his traitorous eyes snapped open.
Jean's steady grey stare bore into him and Jeremy felt his breath catch in his throat. He was so close now Jeremy could see the way his pupils dilated as his gaze searched Jeremy's own.
"J-Jean," he stuttered out nervously, his voice barely a whisper.
Jean's eyes widened a fraction, and Jeremy felt every second like a lifetime between them. He watched with bated breath as Jean's head titled ever so slightly to the side, his gaze raking over the plains of Jeremy's face. He resisted the urge to squirm as he caught Jean's eyes undoubtedly tracking the flush that now rose under his cheeks. Instead, he dug his hand into the sheets to stop himself from doing something stupid.
His thoughts were a jumbled mess, unable to string a simple sentence together. He thought perhaps he knew what that look in Jean's eyes meant, but if he was wrong Jeremy didn't think he'd ever recover from the consequences.
Jean leant in further then and Jeremy's eyes slipped shut, unable to bear his stare without being able to reach for him. His fingers twitched at the thought and Jeremy's mouth betrayed him once more, spilling out the name of his deepest desire currently breaths away from pressing him down into the mattress below.
"Jean?" Jeremy exhaled again.
Jeremy felt the puff of breath that left Jean's nose as he exhaled deep before replying, "Jeremy." His accent floated over the vowels of Jeremy's name like waves crawling over sandy shores. Jeremy couldn't help his full-bodied shiver at the sound of Jean's voice saying his name so soft and sultry. It was obvious Jean had felt it. Jeremy could hear the slight smirk as he continued with, "Do it. I trust you."
The breath left Jeremy's lungs as his eyes snapped open again. Jean's thumb was there a second later, resting at the corner of his left eye - a featherlight brush of skin that sent his stomach plummeting with want.
Jean's stare was calm and steady. Unhesitating and full of trust as he tracked the movement of his own thumb.
Jeremy reached for him.
Jean sighed as if in relief at the first press of Jeremy's warm palm over his waist. His charcoal shirt was silky smooth and soft, his body warm, strong, and solid under Jeremy's touch. Jean leaned down further, until his soft unruly hairs tickled the skin of Jeremy's forehead - his elbow now digging into the mattress by Jeremy's head.
Jean's eyes had slipped shut now and Jeremy just about caught sight of his fluttering eyelashes.
Testing the boundaries of his own constraint, Jeremy slid his palm further up the length of Jean's back, lost in the way Jean reacted with another gentle exhale of breath. Jeremy couldn't hold himself back as he felt the warm puff of air directly over his mouth, Jean's plush and enticing lips almost brushing his own.
Jeremy's eyes closed again as he tilted his head back slightly, murmuring just shy of against Jean's lips. "Jean, can I...?"
Jean's answer was a deep inhale of breath through his nose before his mouth came surging into Jeremy's. Except there was no pressure. Jean's lips were soft and gentle against Jeremy's own and after a second of nothingness, where Jeremy felt like he was floating, he registered the slight tremble from the man above him.
Jean paused, his mouth still lingering against Jeremy's, his body tense under Jeremy's palm. He smoothed over Jean's back again and sighed against his lips before pressing in. Gentle and slow, Jeremy pecked at Jean's lips until he eventually relaxed and followed Jeremy's lead.
Jeremy couldn't help himself, after shamelessly wanting him for so long, each kiss was accompanied by a stretch of his mouth into a blissful smile. Kissing another person had never felt so satisfying.
Jean pulled back first, and Jeremy relaxed the hand over his back allowing him to pull away, though he desperately wished he wouldn't.
Hesitantly, trying to catch Jean's eye, he asked, "Okay?"
But Jean's eyes remained clenched shut, as if he was afraid that Jeremy would see him. The tender stroke of his fingers was second nature and Jeremy almost regretted it when Jean visibly shuddered until his eyes snapped open.
Jean stared down at Jeremy.
Less than a breath later, his mouth crashed into Jeremy's once more. This time it was all fire, an explosion of ecstasy that was clumsy and uncoordinated but no less welcome.
Jeremy couldn't help the surprised noise that tumbled out from the back of his throat. It quickly turned to a moan as Jean sunk all his weight into Jeremy.
His grip tightened in Jean's shirt and his knees came up of their own accord, bracketing Jean’s waist, but still keeping his distance. Jeremy was on fire, the heat of Jean's body burning through him alight like a firework.
Jean only made matters worse when his hand latched onto Jeremy's thigh and tugged his leg up closer over his hip. Jeremy gasped against Jean's mouth before diving back in.
His hand left Jean's back to wound up into his hair instead, and the desperate lilt to Jean's voice as he groaned Jeremy's name, then sucked his bottom lip into his mouth, had Jeremy bucking his hips up daringly.
A loud banging on the door tore them apart in seconds. Jean flinched painfully and ripped himself away from Jeremy. He blinked rapidly, his heart racing as Jean stumbled backwards off the bed, almost crashing into the TV and stand behind him.
Cat's voice called out, "Hello? Are you ready? Open up!"
Chests heaving, mouths open, lips red and swollen they stared at each other.
Cat called out once more and Jeremy's brain somehow managed to conjure a response. Clearing his throat, he called, "Coming."
Jean watched him for a beat, his eyes heavy with what Jeremy could only liken to hunger, his thumb slowly ghosting over his own bottom lip. Jeremy swallowed, heat pooling in his stomach, his skin starting to sweat.
Too soon Jean ripped his stare away again, moving off toward the door. Jeremy mentally cursed at the timing of their friend's arrival.
It was another heavy second before Jeremy heard the click as the door opened.
Quickly, he scrambled to the edge of the bed as Cat waltzed her way into the room. Hands on her hips she observed them both. When no one spoke, she rose her eyebrows and said, "Ties?"
Jeremy swallowed and stuttered again, "R-right. Yes. Give us a sec. We'll meet you at the elevator."
His hand went to his throat instinctively, smoothing the skin as his pulse raced under his fingertips. He made the mistake of looking at Jean and almost dug his fingers in as he caught his eyes tracking Jeremy's movements.
He blinked up at Jeremy when he realised he'd been caught, and both boys looked away.
Cat huffed and threw her hands up in frustration before pacing back towards the door. "Five minutes!" she called out, and Jeremy's body sagged in relief once he heard the door shut behind her.
Jean stayed where he was, his gaze locked onto the carpet below. Jeremy watched him for a drawn-out minute before sighing and scrubbing wearily over his face. They wouldn't be talking about this any time soon then.
"Guess we better get moving," he mumbled, snatching up his tie from small table they'd been given in their room. Jean didn't move as Jeremy distractedly twisted his tie into place. Once he was done, Jean was staring at him, and Jeremy felt a hot full-body flush rise under his skin.
"Shoes," he managed to choke out as he dropped Jean's gaze and moved past him to search for his dress shoes. Jean didn't move out of his way and Jeremy almost shook from the anticipation of how close he had to manoeuvre around him.
Eventually Jean moved off to snatch up his own tie and Jeremy fussed about pretending to be distracted until Jean's huff of annoyance had him turning back.
Stealing the butterflies swarming in his stomach Jeremy went back over to him, his hand held out in offering. "Let me?" he asked cautiously. Jean's stare was heavy yet unreadable, his grey eyes like molten metal boring into Jeremy's brown ones.
After a drawn out second Jean handed over the offending accessory. Jeremy wound it around Jean's neck before he promptly lost all thought and hand-eye coordination. After a few clumsy attempts where he purposely avoided looking back at Jean, he eventually managed to wound it into shape.
He smiled with satisfaction as he tightened it into place by Jean's throat while his fingers itched to reach out and feel Jean's skin. "Easier on-" he'd started to say when Jean beat his urges to it.
Jeremy's words trapped in his throat as Jean's fingers smoothed out his collar, pushing the lapels flat, his hands lingering over the tops of Jeremy's chest.
"Horrid creations," he mumbled. "No better than a noose."
From this close, and when he wasn't currently sandwiched between the man and a mattress, Jeremy could see every contour of Jean's face. His stunning crooked nose was a breath away, his tattoo in stark contrast against his still fair skin, a minuscule birth mark at the corner of his lip that Jeremy wanted so badly to kiss.
Jeremy meant to laugh off his comment, but a far more damning statement slipped out instead. "You look good."
Jean froze, his hands ghosting over Jeremy's chest, his own now pathetically hanging by his side.
When Jean didn't speak, Jeremy looked away and felt his resolve die. He stepped back, clearing his throat again, feeling a flush of heat creeping in for a whole different reason this time. He'd need to change into a new shirt at this rate.
"Ready?"
He risked another glance at Jean, unable to help himself when he looked this way, so suave and handsome in his charcoal shirt and tie, his black slacks hugging his waist exceptionally well.
The look on Jean's face could only be described as hungry and Jeremy wondered if his own was currently betraying him this way too. As if of one mind, both their eyes flickered down to each other's lips and then back up again.
They were reaching for each other an instant later. They crashed together like two wanting waves and the sigh Jean let out into Jeremy's mouth had his knees weakening. If not for Jean's palm tenderly cupping his jaw, tipping his head back, and his strong broad shoulders under Jeremy's hands, he was sure he would have collapsed to the floor like a puppet whose strings had been cut.
He gasped in surprised when Jean's arm wound expertly around his waist and tugged him forward, fitting them together like two pieces in a puzzle. Jean swallowed the sound, as he tilted his head to the side expertly sucking over Jeremy's bottom lip with a level of fervour Jeremy hadn't known he was capable of.
Part of Jeremy knew that was was happening was utterly insane, and damningly dangerous, but he couldn't help himself. Nothing would be the same after this. But nothing would tear Jeremy's mouth away from Jean's right now. Not even a gun to the back of his head, and not if the whole room was on fire around them.
Their kisses turned messy and slick with saliva, and Jeremy pressed teasingly over Jean's lips with his tongue until they both pulled back for air. Jean rested his head against Jeremy's his skin warm and the weight comforting.
"Jesus, now I really don't want to go down there," Jeremy whispered breathlessly.
Jean's hand smoothed over the length of Jeremy's jaw (his other still fit snug around Jeremy's waist) until his thumb came to rest over the dip of his chin.
He tilted Jeremy's face slightly and pecked him lightly on the lips before responding. "Attendance is mandatory."
Jeremy laughed in disbelief, feeling giddy and high with happiness that he was certain would be a far away concept on this night. How strange he had found it with Jean's arms wrapped around him. How strange he'd found it in the press of his soft lips. How strange that it didn't feel strange at all.
Because kissing Jean felt right. It felt natural. Like this was exactly where Jeremy was meant to be. Jean's mouth was the softest salvation Jeremy would ever know.
Jeremy's smile was bashful as he tapped his thumbs playfully over Jean's collar bones. "Right. Exy wins out."
Jean reached up to tweak at the hairs flopping over Jeremy's forehead before releasing him. The loss of his body heat and closeness was disheartening and Jeremy fought the urge to stumble forward into his space, not yet ready to be apart.
"The girls are waiting," Jean reminded him, and Jeremy frowned before nodding absently. Jean's fingertips came to rest at the corner of Jeremy's lip, and he almost lost all his resolve. How Jean could tear him open so viscerally with such a tender, yet casual touch Jeremy had no idea.
He idly wondered if Jean had done this before with anyone else. The pastel rainbow tips of the Foxes goalkeeper flashed in his mind, and he quickly shook the image away along with the faint stab of jealousy.
Now was not the time for such thoughts.
"Later. I promise," Jean added.
One look at Jean's reflected wanting gaze had Jeremy nodding his head. "Yeah. Yeah, okay. Later."
He thought he caught a twitch to Jean's lips that could have been his version of a smirk, but then he blinked, and it was gone. Jeremy forced himself to take a step back, then two more. He brushed his hair back and straightened out his jacket as Jean threw on his own before Jeremy turned and headed for the door.
He handed over a key card to Jean, tucking his own into his pocket and reaching for the handle.
He had the door open a mere centimetre when Jean suddenly leaned over into his space, almost caging him in as one arm pressed the door shut again above Jeremy's head.
Turning to look back at Jean, Jeremy said, "You know, this really isn't helping." His words were light, his smile teasing.
But Jean's face remained serious as he repeated his request from earlier. "The phrase."
Jeremy felt an unpleasant swoop in his stomach. The phantom weight of Jean's mouth on his lingered and Jeremy realised he'd almost forgotten what awaited him for the rest of the evening. Jeremy gulped nervously and somehow managed to mumble out the words the way Jean had taught him.
Jean's nod was satisfied, and Jeremy's knees almost gave out when his warm hand covered Jeremy's own on the door handle, pulling it open once more.
Another hand at the small of his back guided him out the room, the light touch leaving him swooning then and there as he moved over the threshold. Jean's casual gentle chivalry had Jeremy sending up a million thanks to the heavens, and not for the first time, he wondered how such a man could arise from the flames of such a sinister life.
Absently, Jeremy spotted Cat and Laila down the hall, and he sucked in a shaky breath making his way toward them.
Jean was a solid and reliable presence at his back and Jeremy wished he could reach for his hand for extra comfort, but for now this would do. Jean was on his side tonight. And he would be every night following. He had kissed Jeremy with an unfound level of affection and held him with even more tenderness.
It would be a far cry and ridiculous thing if Jeremy forgot the sensation of Jean's hot and hungry mouth before the night was over.