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It was a well known fact amongst the school that if you needed to find Mr. LeMann, he'd be in the band room. It was also a know fact that if you needed to find Mr. SV, he'd be in the US history classroom. Notably, neither locations were their own classrooms or subjects. But as soon as you stepped foot in the door as a freshman, word traveled fast: Mr. LeMann and Mr. SV sure seemed like they were married, but it was best not to bring it up.
It wasn't that it would offend the two men. They were just as accepting and kind as any of the other staff at Hermiton High School. No, the real reason not to ask was just because it was pointless and painful. Painful in the sense that it was impossible for students to sit through another round of hearing "Oh gosh no, he's just my buddy!" or "Us? No way, he's my best friend!" Any upperclassmen could tell you, they already tried to point out the clear chemistry between the two teachers, and yet, no dice.
Every year, bets were taken on if the two men would get together, in any capacity beyond the platonic. And every year, the freshman got a little poorer, and the seniors got a little richer, because Mr. LeMann and Mr. SV seemed to get a little more oblivious.
And as fun as it is to watch your students lose their minds at the idea of a romance between their teachers, it was severely out weighed by the pain of being their coworkers. Gem could tell you. In fact, she was currently telling Pearl.
"I just can't do it anymore! I've only been teaching here two years and I already want to lock them in the janitor's closet just to get them to figure it out!" She lamented.
It wasn't the first time she'd come to Pearl to vent about this. Thankfully, Gem's classroom was a few hallways down from Skizz's, and halfway across the school from Impulse. That meant she didn't have to see their constant oblivion to their own affectionate grossness, as she liked to call it. Unfortunately, despite the distance, her lunch break was not so lucky. She loved eating lunch with Skizz, their breaks did line up this year, but she was on the verge of ripping her ears off if she heard about how amazing "dippledop" was one more time.
So her reprieve was Pearl's classroom, an hour or so after students went home, to rant and rave to her hearts content. Her therapy couch was a metal desk, and her counselor was a half-listening, over worked, underpaided, wonderful best friend. It worked well for them, to unpack their days and destress from the sometimes hectic occurrences of their occupation. Sometimes Gem went to Grian, or even Impulse and Skizz, but Pearl always worked liked a charm to get her to calm down.
"I don't know Gem, I think you'll just have to get used to it. Impulse and Skizz have always just been..." Pearl gestured vaguely in the air, "... Like that."
And, as if speaking Gem's horrors into existence, Skizz popped his head through the door. "Hey Pearl- oh, hey Gemmy! Have either of you seen Impulse? He left some sheet music in my room, but he's not in his office for me to get it back to him."
Pearl smiled, stifling her laugh as Gem tried not to scream in frustration. "Nah, sorry mate. What's the music for?"
Skizz's face lit up. "Oh, dude, it's amazing! Impy and I are writing this epic drumline piece for the next football game, you guys have to come see it. He's put so much time into it, it's really amazing. Honestly, I swear he gets more creative and talented every year."
Gem thought she might puke from watching Skizz swoon so openly. Seriously, how could the guy sound so lovestruck and yet not have a clue he was in love? Surely he had to be in love. If this type of behavior was platonic, Gem would go back to the science lab and eat her own safety goggles, Grian as her witness.
She knew she had no chance of getting the two men together. Tango had told her as much, grimly retelling his years of torture as a friend of the two men. He'd been teaching at the school for over 10 years, and was a seasoned veteran of the Impulse SV and Skizz LeMann trainwreck. Despite that, Gem was nothing if not persistent. Additionally, her occupation as a biology teacher gave her a predisposition to enacting experimentation. Skizz was presenting a moment for such experimentation.
"Wow Skizz," she started casually, "is he really all that?"
"Oh Gemstone, he's all that and more!" Skizz gushed.
Gem smiled innocently. "You should ask him out then! I'm sure he'd be flattered."
Skizz's smile went slack on his face, redness rising to his cheeks. Gem knew he was never confronted so directly about Impulse, at least not from staff. He fidgeted in the doorway, trying to act unbothered and failing spectacularly.
"He- we're not uh- he doesn't-" Skizz swallowed hard. Gem tried not to laugh. She'd never seen him like this, and if she knew she'd get this response she would've done it a lot sooner.
"He's not interested." Skizz finished lamely.
Pearl broke first, laughing suddenly before covering her mouth and apologizing through giggles. "Skizzy, what on earth makes you think that?" She asked after regaining her composure.
Skizz glanced behind himself into the hallway before stepping fully into the room and closing the door behind him.
"Listen, even if I was interested- and I'm not saying I am- he's already turned plenty of people down. I'm not going to change that."
Gem raised an eyebrow. She knew Impulse wasn't in a relationship, but she also didn't know he was getting offers. "Turned people down?"
"Yeah." Skizz sat on a desk across from Gem. "People ask, and he says no all sweet and flustered, always claiming he's not looking for anything or he's not interested."
Gem tried not to roll her eyes. Even when Skizz was claiming disinterest, he still couldn't help but sound enamored with Impulse.
"Mate, have you ever considered he's not interested in dating other people because he's interested in dating you?" Pearl beat Gem to the claim.
Skizz picked at a pealing piece of desk laminate. "That's... No, that's impossible."
Gem sighed. Skizz was so stubborn, sometimes even worse than herself. She didn't understand how it was so crazy to imagine yourself with your best friend, she was certainly no stranger to it.
Before she or Pearl could try again to convince him, the door swung open.
"Pearl, have you seen- Skizz! Never mind, I guess you have seen him." Impulse laughed. "I couldn't find you, man!"
Gem glanced at Skizz, immensely humored to see how red his face was. Maybe their comments did get to him somehow.
"Hey Impy, I was looking for you too. What did you need?"
"I'm ready to work on the drumline piece, all I need is a Skizz."
Skizz stood up from the desk and smiled. "Well now you got one, Dippledop! Let's go."
Gem caught Skizz's eye as he walked out the door. He glanced between her and Impulse, his blush deepening, before Impulse grabbed his arm and pulled him away.
"I got lots of ideas, chop chop Skizz!"
The door shut behind them. Gem and Pearl side-eyed each other, both surely thinking the same thing. They couldn't hold their stares for long though, quickly dissolving into giggles.
"Oh, Gem, they're hopeless!" Pearl laughed.
Gem allowed her giggles to subside before looking at the door, thinking over what she saw.
"No, Pearl, I think we might just get them together yet."
After all, Gem had more than just Pearl to scheme with. All she needed was a plan.