Work Text:
Pluey doodled absentmindedly as he listened to Battat ramble to himself. Since Jongler was currently on Mike duty, the Pippins was back to his board as always, currently investigating The Cowboy Theory™. He'd been looking through Jongler's favorite old western show for clues on Mike for a little while now, but ever since they found some old copies of the original cuts hidden in storage, he'd been really homing in on it.
"...Tenna runs reruns of it all the time, more than any of the other shows we've produced!! But if he likes it that much, then why hasn't there been a new episode of it in so long? Was it Mike who liked it, is that why it was cancelled when he left?? No, I'm pretty sure it was cancelled before Mike left, or at least before Tenna started getting sad about Mike leaving... maybe it has to do with Asgore then? How long has it been since he hasn't been forced to sleep on the couch, anyways?" Battat jotted something down on his notepad before ripping it out and pinning it to the board. "I need to make an actual timeline for this all at some point, it'd make keeping track of things easier..."
Even though Pluey didn't understand it all, they loved listening to Battat ramble about his conspiracy theories over Mike. Or anything, really. The Pippins just had so much energy every time he talked, even if it was just to himself half of the time! The little hand gestures he did as he explained something, the different voices he did to quote other people, the way he made even the most boring things sound interesting; he was just so different from anyone Pluey had met before, and they loved that about him, even if he was a bit rough around the edges.
Pluey snapped out of their thoughts as they heard footsteps from the other room, perking up as Jongler hopped in in full Mike get-up.
"Heya, Plues', heya, Batts'," they said, giving a small head bonk to each of their coworkers before sitting down. It was something Pluey had noticed the Zapper had started doing more and more recently. Battat always seemed to find it annoying, but Pluey thought it was sweet, even if they didn't really understand it! It was probably just a Zapper thing or something.
"Ya still workin' on the new board? How's it comin' along?"
Battat waved dismissively at them, not taking his eyes off the board. "Oh, hey Jongler. Give me a second, I think I'm actually onto something for once."
Jongler waited patiently, taking off their costume as the Pippins wrapped a piece of red string across a couple of the pins.
"Okay, so I've been looking into your cowboy show, right? It's one of the only shows Tenna actually likes doing reruns of, it's almost guaranteed to be playing every time we need some filler! But I've been thinking: what if the reason Tenna likes it so much is because Mike liked it?? There's decent evidence for it, especially with your Mike being able to get away with wearing the cowboy hat. And the whole family likes westerns, too, which only adds to the connections between the two!!”
“But you know who loves the cowboy show the most?" Battat turned around, slamming on the table for emphasis. "Asgore. He's been sleeping on the couch more and more lately, and even though I don't have the exact dates lined up just yet, I'm pretty sure it started around the same time Mike went missing!! So obviously it all has something to do with Mike!! Maybe Asgore even is Mike!!!"
Jongler tilted their head slightly. "...I, uh, dunno about all dat, boss. I mean, I like the cowboy show, too, but dat doesn't mean I'm Mike. Or, I guess I am, but... well, you know." They looked up at the tangled mess of string and papers on the board, slightly concerned. "Youse probably needs t' take a break for now, I think."
"I don't need a-" he shot back automatically, before visibly hesitating as he realized how insane his theory was starting to get. “...okay, yeah. I've probably gone insane at this point." He sat down again with a sigh, grabbing at his notepad. "I'm still writing it down, though."
"It's okay, boss, I'm sure you'll find somethin' soon!" they said, patting him on the back. "I can help ya look through the storage again later if ya want!"
Pluey listened to the exchange with a smile. That's what they loved about Jongler. They were the responsible one, but they still genuinely listened and cared about their friends and their interests!! Even when they sometimes forgot stuff, they always tried their best to help people out and show that they cared. Jongler was the one who had kept reaching out to Pluey when they first met, eventually bringing them out of their shell, and they were the one who proposed joining Battat's conspiracy, even when they barely knew the guy. They always took good care of the two as well, making sure Battat actually ate and slept and making sure Pluey actually got out every once in a while.
The whole Mike thing is what had really brought the three together, though. Jongler and Pluey may have been decent friends before, but ever since they added Battat to their little group, everything just felt like it fell into place. Being a part of a big operation like this wasn't easy, but he loved it. And with Battat and Jongler by his side, it was one of the best things in the world.
Which is why Pluey eventually found himself with a crush. Two crushes in fact. And it probably didn’t help that he was literally doodling on the backs of two love letters for them at this very moment.
Battat glanced up from his notebook at Pluey. "And what are you smiling about?"
Pluey froze at the sudden attention.
It had been planning to confess to the two for a little while now, workshopping the letters for a good week or so to make sure they were perfect. It'd even found the courage to actually bring them to work a couple of times!! But it hadn't actually, well, given them to them yet.
He still wasn't sure if they'd even want to be partners with him. Battat definitely seemed a bit more comfortable with the two than he had been when they first met, but that could easily be chalked up to them just finally having someone to confide in with the whole Mike thing—they were still pretty abrasive when it came to receiving any open affection. And Jongler was so nice to everyone, it was kind of hard to tell whether they saw them as anything other than a good friend...
It was just... nerve-wracking, to say the least. The Mike thing may have brought them together, but it also made things more complicated, too. What if they rejected him and things ended up awkward forever? Or worse, what if they kicked Pluey out of the group because of it?!
...They probably wouldn't do that. They still definitely liked him, whether it was romantic or platonic. And even if they didn't like him back like that, he didn't really care as long as they still got to be friends.
...Anyways, maybe it was perfect time to get out with it? Battat wasn't busy with his board for once, and Jongler didn't seem too tired from their shift, either! Besides, they had to respond to Battat somehow. They just needed to get it over with!!
Pluey folded up the letters and quickly wrote a note to go with them, sliding them across the table.
[These are for you two! /ᐠ > ˕ <マ ₊˚⊹♡]
"Hmm? Oh, is this what you've been working on this whole time?" Battat grabbed the letters, handing one to Jongler as he started reading his.
.
.
.
Pluey waited, anxiously watching for their reactions. Battat went uncharacteristically silent, his brows furrowing as he read the confession. And Jongler's expression was somehow even more unreadable than usual, though at least they didn't seem to be taking it badly?
After what felt like years, Battat set down the letter, flushed in green. "I— you— we—" he stuttered out, before taking a deep breath and shooting Pluey an annoyed look. "We can't. This isn't—just no. Why would you even want to—" he shook his head, frustrated.
Pluey was honestly expecting this, but they weren't expecting it to hit them so hard. But when Pluey visibly wilted, Battat instantly started waving his arms around.
"Hey, don't get like that!! Look, it's not like I don't like you or anything, it's just—" he hesitated, blushing even more somehow before turning away, crossing his arms. “—Mike can't date Mike!!! So we can't be together!!"
Oh, so that's how this was going to be. Pluey shot Battat an unconvinced look. It was one thing if they didn’t like them back, but this? Pluey knew the Pippins was terrible at taking affection, but what in the dark world was that excuse?? They grabbed a fresh sheet of paper, writing out a response to the green die.
[I don't see why not!!! We're not even actually Mike, so why should that matter!!◟/ᐠﹷ ‸ ﹷ ᐟ\] Pluey glanced back at Jongler (who still hadn't responded yet) repeatedly looking back and forth between Pluey, Battat, and the letter with a furrowed brow. He decided to add another note at the end, just in case.
[If you guys do actually want to be together, of course! No pressure!! /ᐠ ᵕ—⩊—マ] They didn't want to be too presumptuous, after all!!
Battat grabbed the note as soon as they were done, reading it quickly before throwing it back at the table. "Just— look, you don't understand, okay?! Jongler! Tell them why we can't be together!!"
Jongler jolted back at the mention of their name. "I, uhhh…" They avoided the two's gaze, taking a moment to respond.
...They agreed with Battat, didn't they? And Pluey probably made them feel even more awkward about it with its response, too!! It was stupid of him to even do this in the first place, they probably didn’t even—
"...I, uh, already thought we was. Together, I mean. "
They thought what.
"You thought WHAT!?!?"
"...Were we, uh, not?"
Battat stood up, grabbing Jongler by the collar and shaking them as much as they could with their small stature. "No!! Where did you even get that idea, you big bozo??"
Jongler at least had the dignity to look as bewildered as the other two. "I guess I just thought, with how close we are an' everything, we were probably in a relationship or somethin'?? I mean, it's not like we's don't cuddle and sleep together and stuff. I thought you twos were just takin' things slow. I've even kissed you twos multiple times and you haven’t said anythin’ about it!!”
Battat was blushing even harder. "That's just normal coworker stuff!! Right?! RIGHT?!" He paused, letting go of Jongler for a moment as he processed the last part of that sentence, before exploding again. "—WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'VE KISSED US?!?!"
Battat was competing for the world record of greenest die alive right now. Not that Pluey could talk, with how warm their face felt, too. Jongler thought they were dating already?? And what did they mean, they've kissed them?? —Wait, did they mean…? Pluey ripped out another sheet of paper.
[The headbonks, right??] It couldn't even think clearly enough to add a doodle at this point, it was too busy restructuring all their past interactions in their mind. If all of the headbonks were kisses, then they must've thought they've been dating for a while at this point…
Jongler scratched the back of their head. "Uhh, yeahs. I mean, it's not like I really have a mouth or nothin', so I can't really kiss you twos, but..." they blushed, though it was hard to tell whether they were more flustered or embarrassed. "Look, I'm sorry. I've never been in a relationship before or nothin', so I just kinda assumed dis was what it was like?? If it makes you feel any better, though, Plues', I do like ya back! And same goes for you, Batts'."
"That doesn't even— I don't—" they let out a groan. "That doesn't get at my main point!! We're coworkers!! We're Mike!!! We can't just get together like it's no big deal! What if Tenna finds out, huh??"
"Tenna's not supposed to find out about da Mike thing anyways, right? So dat's no biggie. And I feel like we're at least more than just coworkers at dis point, ain't we?" Jongler gave Battat a small pat on the back. "We genuinely like you's, Boss. Like bein' around you an' all that. You don't have t' be scared of it."
Battat had their head in their hands at this point. "I'm not— Ugghhh, you guys are making this so difficult!!"
Pluey finished the longer note they had been writing during all of this, sliding it to the green die.
[Look, we care about you!!! You don't have to push us away just because you think we don't!!! /ᐠ •̀ ˰•́ マ If you don't like us back that way, it's fine, but we're definitely at least friends by now. And if you do like us back, then there's no reason to be worried about it, you idiot!!]
Battat read the note, glancing back up at Pluey with a hesitant look once he finished.
"...I should be the one calling you two idiots," he muttered.
"Yeah, probably." Jongler laughed before giving Battat a cheeky look. "Doesn't mean you aren’t one too sometimes, though."
"Hey, rude much??" Battat jokingly elbowed Jongler, before looking down at the note and the letter again.
He sighed. "... I do really like you guys too, if you somehow couldn't tell by now. I guess I just wasn't expecting you two to actually, you know, like me back at all..."
"Awww, boss, we love you's too... don't say it often enough, but we really do." Pluey nodded in agreement as Jongler patted Battat's head. He looked away, but Pluey could see his face already starting to heat up again. They hadn't expected the confession to be this much of a mess, but they really did love the two Darkners.
After a bit of silence, Jongler coughed, looking a bit awkward. "Just to confirm, we are dating now, right? Should probably make sure I've got dat right this time…" Pluey let out a honk of laughter.
"Yes, you big bozo!! We're—" Battat paused for a moment, suddenly becoming quiet. “…together now, I guess."
"Dat's great then! In that case, we—!" They picked up Battat with ease. “—are movin' to the couch. I've been wantin' to do a whole bunch of lovey-dovey stuff with you twos for a while now, an' now seems like da perfect time!"
“—Wait, just give me a second! I'm still not done working on the board!!" The Pippins tried to wiggle out of the Zapper's arms to no avail. In fact, Jongler only seemed to grip them tighter.
"No Mike stuff, only cuddlin'. And don't worry, Plues', I'm pickin' ya up, too."
Pluey smiled as the taller Darkner picked them up with their free arm. It was nice to know they weren't the only one who was hoping to just chill out together after all this. They were done with work for today anyways, and it's not like Battat couldn't use the break.
Jongler set them down on the couch, Pluey immediately laying on top of Battat before he could get up.
"Pluey. I swear to god if you don't get off of me right now, I am going to bite you."
Pluey just gave them a smug look. Battat never held up on that, despite threatening them with it more than once. They knew he’d calm down eventually, anyways.
As Jongler settled into the couch next to them, the Shadowguy sprawled out over the two, same as always.
…They really did just always act like this, huh? Jongler's assumption was starting to make more and more sense the more they thought about it, even if it was a bit embarrassing to think about.
After a little while of just sitting there together, Jongler spoke up.
"...Is it fine if I kiss you twos?" They asked, quietly.
Battat stopped struggling against Pluey for a moment, looking away from the two. "...Sure. It's not like you haven't apparently been doing it already, so it's not like it's a big deal or anything..." For some extremely bright green reason, Pluey didn't believe he really thought that.
In lieu of getting up and grabbing their notebook, Pluey reached up and gave Jongler a small peck on the cheek. Hopefully that worked as an answer.
Jongler blushed, startled by the sudden show of affection. Then, slowly at first, they started to shower them each with ‘kisses’, softly bonking each on the head a couple times before it devolved into more of them simply nuzzling the two.
Pluey leaned up into it, feeling their cheeks start to warm as a bit of static electricity built up between them. He didn't know a whole lot about how Zappers normally showed affection with their lack of features, but this alternative was practically heaven for the cuddly Shadowguy. Even Battat, who was normally touch-avoidant at best, had started to lean into the two, hooking their claws into Pluey's shirt as they nestled under Jongler's arm.
Softly, Jongler transitioned away from the kisses, opting to just snuggle in with their new partners.
"I really do love you twos..."
Pluey made a soft, purring noise in response. This was possibly the best feeling in the world, snuggling with their partners.
Battat mumbled something to the both of them.
"What was dat? I couldn't hear ya, boss."
"...I love you guys, too."