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for want of jared, nineteen by Schistosity
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
27 May 2020
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“Can you read?”
Sothis tumbled to the floor, grabbing at Byleth’s coat with tight fists. We have been had, child! Code yellow! Swerve! Swerve!
The words fell from Byleth’s lips without hesitation.
“I don’t know. Can you write?”~
Byleth can’t read, Sothis can, and the Garreg Mach student body tries to see how far their newest professor is willing to push her luck.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,463
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 115
- Kudos:
- 2,902
- Bookmarks:
- 858
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Bookmarked by AllIWantToDoIsRead
20 Jun 2026
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for want of jared, nineteen
“Can you read?”
Sothis tumbled to the floor, grabbing at Byleth’s coat with tight fists. We have been had, child! Code yellow! Swerve! Swerve!
The words fell from Byleth’s lips without hesitation.
“I don’t know. Can you write?”
~
Byleth can’t read, Sothis can, and the Garreg Mach student body tries to see how far their newest professor is willing to push her luck. -
lysinette just posted "FAIL FOOTAGE PT. 29, GAUTIER CRINGE COMPILATION" by postfixrevolution
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
15 Mar 2020
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lonewolf__
natural selection exists only for the sole purpose of weeding imbeciles like him outlysinette
if you want him dead that badly, just kill him yourselfLysithea and Annette make Sylvain YouTube famous. Internet fame is neither free nor forgiving, especially if it's based entirely on a 29 part (and growing) cringe compilation, but at least Sylvain has his friends.
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21 Jun 2026
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lysinette just posted "FAIL FOOTAGE PT. 29, GAUTIER CRINGE COMPILATION"
lonewolf__
natural selection exists only for the sole purpose of weeding imbeciles like him outlysinette
if you want him dead that badly, just kill him yourselfLysithea and Annette make Sylvain YouTube famous. Internet fame is neither free nor forgiving, especially if it's based entirely on a 29 part (and growing) cringe compilation, but at least Sylvain has his friends.
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Like Cats and Dogs by dirtbagtrashcat
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
13 Jul 2022
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When Felix starts avoiding him, Sylvain does what he always does: he sneaks off to the stables to complain to the horses. But this time, someone's beat him to the punch. Fellow horse girl Ferdinand von Aegir is nursing his own heartache, and doesn’t mind making room for one more.
In which a pair of golden retrievers ‘yes-and’ each other into the highly inadvisable, potentially lethal plot to make their crushes jealous by fake dating each other. A ferdibert x sylvix comedy of errors.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 22,889
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Comments:
- 139
- Kudos:
- 1,277
- Bookmarks:
- 293
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- 12,842
Bookmarked by AllIWantToDoIsRead
20 Jun 2026
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Like Cats and Dogs
When Felix starts avoiding him, Sylvain does what he always does: he sneaks off to the stables to complain to the horses. But this time, someone's beat him to the punch. Fellow horse girl Ferdinand von Aegir is nursing his own heartache, and doesn’t mind making room for one more.
In which a pair of golden retrievers ‘yes-and’ each other into the highly inadvisable, potentially lethal plot to make their crushes jealous by fake dating each other. A ferdibert x sylvix comedy of errors.
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canens umbrarum by The_Amarathine_Carrion for MissMarquin
Fandoms: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
17 May 2020
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Felix and Sylvain have maintained a mutual exchange of services for centuries.
Sylvain wants more.
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20 Jun 2026
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canens umbrarum
Felix and Sylvain have maintained a mutual exchange of services for centuries.
Sylvain wants more.
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Lucky Number Seven by florilegia
Fandoms: 人渣反派自救系统 - 墨香铜臭 | The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
06 Nov 2025
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Shang Qinghua has been jumped by a Hidden System Event that requires him to...'ensure satisfactory romantic outcomes' for the secondary characters? Fortunately, he's an ingenious problem solver and nothing ever goes wrong with his plans, ever. Ahaha. Ha. The fact that all of Cang Qiong is under a Luck spell certainly won't be a massive complication, either!
(Fuck.)
OR: Shang Qinghua truth serums the sect leader, in the name of love.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,738
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 49
- Kudos:
- 333
- Bookmarks:
- 54
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- 2,148
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17 Jun 2026
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Lucky Number Seven
Shang Qinghua has been jumped by a Hidden System Event that requires him to...'ensure satisfactory romantic outcomes' for the secondary characters? Fortunately, he's an ingenious problem solver and nothing ever goes wrong with his plans, ever. Ahaha. Ha. The fact that all of Cang Qiong is under a Luck spell certainly won't be a massive complication, either!
(Fuck.)
OR: Shang Qinghua truth serums the sect leader, in the name of love.
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I like my men like I like my tea- mean by preciousbunnynoiz
Fandoms: 人渣反派自救系统 - 墨香铜臭 | The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
23 Feb 2026
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Yue Qingyuan is "accidentally" drugged during a Peak Lord Meeting and proceeds to run his mouth.
It ends well for him.
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17 Jun 2026
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I like my men like I like my tea- mean
Yue Qingyuan is "accidentally" drugged during a Peak Lord Meeting and proceeds to run his mouth.
It ends well for him.
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Guard shenanigans by DpsMercy
Fandoms: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
06 Apr 2025
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A collection of comics of Temple Guards going through their shifts (and maybe causing some chaos).
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 0
- Chapters:
- 6/?
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 145
- Kudos:
- 801
- Bookmarks:
- 290
- Hits:
- 3,575
Bookmarked by AllIWantToDoIsRead
17 Jun 2026
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Guard shenanigans
A collection of comics of Temple Guards going through their shifts (and maybe causing some chaos).
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Aventurine's sordid reputation is well-known throughout the IPC, and he's made no effort to hide it. People coming to him, knowing he'd lend them his body as long as they agree to give up whatever he wanted from them... it makes his job smoother.
Until he lets it slip to Ratio that, despite his active sex life, he's never had any form of sex education.
(Or: Ratio teaches a sex ed lesson that is entirely professional and will not contain any 'demonstrations'. Until it does.)
Bookmarked by AllIWantToDoIsRead
17 Jun 2026
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Educational Materials
Aventurine's sordid reputation is well-known throughout the IPC, and he's made no effort to hide it. People coming to him, knowing he'd lend them his body as long as they agree to give up whatever he wanted from them... it makes his job smoother.
Until he lets it slip to Ratio that, despite his active sex life, he's never had any form of sex education.
(Or: Ratio teaches a sex ed lesson that is entirely professional and will not contain any 'demonstrations'. Until it does.)
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Fishbowl by tayzzyronth for tiniestlove
Fandoms: 崩坏：星穹铁道 | Honkai: Star Rail (Video Game)
18 Nov 2024
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“Aventurine? What brings you to call me at this hour?” Her tone was the same as always — smug, confident, and a little condescending. “A lady needs her beauty sleep, you know.”
“Don’t worry, I wouldn’t dream of keeping you held up for long.” He toweled off his face, taking with it excess product from his skin routine. “I was just wondering if you could send me the doctor’s contact info. He ghosted me at the eleventh hour!”
Jade was silent on the other line for a few moments. “You’ll have to be a bit more specific. Which doctor are you talking about?”
Aventurine paused. “Uh… who else? You know, Ratio?”
“Who is ‘Ratio’ supposed to be, exactly?”
The toothbrush clattered as it fell into the sink, slipping entirely from Aventurine’s grasp.
That was when he knew something was wrong.
Bookmarked by AllIWantToDoIsRead
17 Jun 2026
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Fishbowl
“Aventurine? What brings you to call me at this hour?” Her tone was the same as always — smug, confident, and a little condescending. “A lady needs her beauty sleep, you know.”
“Don’t worry, I wouldn’t dream of keeping you held up for long.” He toweled off his face, taking with it excess product from his skin routine. “I was just wondering if you could send me the doctor’s contact info. He ghosted me at the eleventh hour!”
Jade was silent on the other line for a few moments. “You’ll have to be a bit more specific. Which doctor are you talking about?”
Aventurine paused. “Uh… who else? You know, Ratio?”
“Who is ‘Ratio’ supposed to be, exactly?”
The toothbrush clattered as it fell into the sink, slipping entirely from Aventurine’s grasp.
That was when he knew something was wrong.
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Aventurine wants a kid, and has no qualms about being a single parent. Still, it would be dangerous to let just any random Alpha father his child, so at Jade's suggestion, he joins an IPC matchmaking program to ensure the best genetic match to have the healthiest, happiest kiddo possible.
The only problem is that apparently, his best match in the universe is Veritas Ratio.
Who is also his ex.
Bookmarked by AllIWantToDoIsRead
17 Jun 2026
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Terms & Conditions
Aventurine wants a kid, and has no qualms about being a single parent. Still, it would be dangerous to let just any random Alpha father his child, so at Jade's suggestion, he joins an IPC matchmaking program to ensure the best genetic match to have the healthiest, happiest kiddo possible.
The only problem is that apparently, his best match in the universe is Veritas Ratio.
Who is also his ex.
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Summary
Doctor Veritas Ratio hates Aventurine’s scent.
Aventurine doesn’t blame him. He hates his scent too.
The slave brand over his gland had made sure of that.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,181
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 101
- Kudos:
- 1,492
- Bookmarks:
- 237
- Hits:
- 13,847
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17 Jun 2026
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Rotten Work
Doctor Veritas Ratio hates Aventurine’s scent.
Aventurine doesn’t blame him. He hates his scent too.
The slave brand over his gland had made sure of that.
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gold lie promises by crownshy (bringingglory) for rire
Fandoms: 崩坏：星穹铁道 | Honkai: Star Rail (Video Game)
10 May 2024
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“Why didn’t you tell me?” asked Ratio, voice low.
Aventurine laughed again. “Why does it matter?”
“Gambler…”
Too soft. Too quiet. Too much like a secret on the verge of breaking. Not enough of a threat. The fear came clawing again, prodding at Aventurine, wondering, How to turn how to get away how to redirect?
Redirect.
“Ahh.” Aventurine let a smile slide across his face, slow and serpentine. He raised his voice to shatter the silence. “I know what you want.”
Ratio shows up outside of Aventurine's rooms after finding out Aventurine survived Penacony.
Bookmarked by AllIWantToDoIsRead
17 Jun 2026
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gold lie promises
“Why didn’t you tell me?” asked Ratio, voice low.
Aventurine laughed again. “Why does it matter?”
“Gambler…”
Too soft. Too quiet. Too much like a secret on the verge of breaking. Not enough of a threat. The fear came clawing again, prodding at Aventurine, wondering, How to turn how to get away how to redirect?
Redirect.
“Ahh.” Aventurine let a smile slide across his face, slow and serpentine. He raised his voice to shatter the silence. “I know what you want.”
Ratio shows up outside of Aventurine's rooms after finding out Aventurine survived Penacony.
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- Words:
- 7,445
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 63
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17 Jun 2026
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stay until meowning
And it is a copy of Aventurine, even if Veritas has his doubts that Caelus has ever met the man. The creature’s shell is the same shade of turquoise as Aventurine’s favorite shirt, and the heavy steel gray of its feet match Aventurine’s prized hat and coat. The spade on the belt wrapped around its tail is an entirely unnecessary additional confirmation.
In the photo, the Aventurine-creature leans sleepily into the Veritas-creature, eyes shut, mouth curled into a familiar self-satisfied smirk. If the image had sound, it would no doubt be purring.
Veritas’ chest tightens at the sight, and he forces himself to scroll away.
~~
The Trailblazer sends Ratio photos of a pair of very bizarre but familiar-looking creations, and maybe Ratio really should have expected what would happen next after saving one as his new wallpaper. -
the wind carries whispers of your name by morii_tea
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
06 Apr 2021
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The winds of Teyvat are known for carrying the seeds of hope, and today, the winds have brought him Xiao.
In which Venti loses his Gnosis and Xiao finds him at the great tree at Windrise.
Bookmarked by AllIWantToDoIsRead
16 Jun 2026
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the wind carries whispers of your name
The winds of Teyvat are known for carrying the seeds of hope, and today, the winds have brought him Xiao.
In which Venti loses his Gnosis and Xiao finds him at the great tree at Windrise.
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“I was just wondering if you wanted me to call you something else,” he says finally, tracing patterns into Zhongli’s side with his fingertips.
“Something else?”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,134
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 32
- Kudos:
- 1,137
- Bookmarks:
- 123
- Hits:
- 7,220
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16 Jun 2026
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On the Philosophy of Names
“I was just wondering if you wanted me to call you something else,” he says finally, tracing patterns into Zhongli’s side with his fingertips.
“Something else?”
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- Words:
- 11,706
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 70
Bookmarked by AllIWantToDoIsRead
16 Jun 2026
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streamer au
stelle @stellaron
if this tweet gets 25k likes i will buy dan heng cat ears and make him wear them on stream
32.9k Likes - 8.2k Retweets - 5.6k RepliesIn which one of the great mysteries of the content creating community is how in the world the stoic, ex-pro VALORANT player Dan Heng began associating with the cryptic, unhinged YouTuber Stelle and the cheery, goofball of a streamer that is March 7th.
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When Gepard realizes he's head over heels in love with Belobog's most prolific petty criminal, he kind of just shrugs it off and doesn't care to try hiding it. After all, why bother? It's not like pretending it doesn't exist will make it any less true. Nothing is actually going to come from his feelings. Besides, in his experience, honesty is always the best policy.
(Or: Sampo and Gepard are in love with one another, but Gepard happens to be painstakingly, horrifically, brutally honest about it. And Sampo's got... no idea what to do with that.)
Bookmarked by AllIWantToDoIsRead
16 Jun 2026
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Honesty's Policy
When Gepard realizes he's head over heels in love with Belobog's most prolific petty criminal, he kind of just shrugs it off and doesn't care to try hiding it. After all, why bother? It's not like pretending it doesn't exist will make it any less true. Nothing is actually going to come from his feelings. Besides, in his experience, honesty is always the best policy.
(Or: Sampo and Gepard are in love with one another, but Gepard happens to be painstakingly, horrifically, brutally honest about it. And Sampo's got... no idea what to do with that.)
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What Happens in Golden Hour Stays in Golden Hour by martialartist816
Fandoms: 崩坏：星穹铁道 | Honkai: Star Rail (Video Game)
23 Jan 2026
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If you get married in the Dreamscape, do you get married in real life?
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16 Jun 2026
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What Happens in Golden Hour Stays in Golden Hour
If you get married in the Dreamscape, do you get married in real life?
Ratio/Aventurine
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Xianzhou law speaks of marriage as "until death do us part", but Vidyadhara do not die and have their own special subset of laws pertaining marriage and inheritance rights. Reincarnation does not absolve a spouse of responsibility – in fact, reincarnation is seen as a separation but not a divorce unless one or both parties officially dissolve the marriage.
This means that Jing Yuan has been paying alimony to Dan Heng ever since he was reborn. Dan Heng, having grown up in a prison, knows nothing about this and the money appearing in his bank account each month after he’s been banished is a strange, but fortunate fact of life. They’re very neatly labelled "alimony".
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16 Jun 2026
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Alimony
Xianzhou law speaks of marriage as "until death do us part", but Vidyadhara do not die and have their own special subset of laws pertaining marriage and inheritance rights. Reincarnation does not absolve a spouse of responsibility – in fact, reincarnation is seen as a separation but not a divorce unless one or both parties officially dissolve the marriage.
This means that Jing Yuan has been paying alimony to Dan Heng ever since he was reborn. Dan Heng, having grown up in a prison, knows nothing about this and the money appearing in his bank account each month after he’s been banished is a strange, but fortunate fact of life. They’re very neatly labelled "alimony".
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A Thousand Days And Nights by OnceABlueMoon
Fandoms: 崩坏：星穹铁道 | Honkai: Star Rail (Video Game)
18 May 2026
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Ratio notices a pattern: Aventurine will sleep with someone and then avoid them. Given his actual romantic interest in Aventurine, it's thus in direct opposition to his goals to sleep with the man. That doesn't mean he doesn't want to - and it only gets more difficult when Aventurine starts to attempt to seduce him...
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,773
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 2
- Kudos:
- 118
- Bookmarks:
- 18
- Hits:
- 675
Bookmarked by AllIWantToDoIsRead
16 Jun 2026
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A Thousand Days And Nights
Ratio notices a pattern: Aventurine will sleep with someone and then avoid them. Given his actual romantic interest in Aventurine, it's thus in direct opposition to his goals to sleep with the man. That doesn't mean he doesn't want to - and it only gets more difficult when Aventurine starts to attempt to seduce him...