1 - 20 of 259 Bookmarks by Elasmith
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"Objectively speaking, Sanji’s wedding day is not the worst thing to ever happen to him – there are far too many contenders for that title, but the day of his mother’s death is probably the one topping the chart – but it is on the list somewhere. And not at the bottom, at that."
Or:
Sanji thinks he's marrying the Demon of the East, the Pirate Hunter, a member of the Worst Generation and a cruel pirate, all for his bastard of a father's benefit.
Meanwhile, Zoro is marrying the hot guy he saw once as a picture in Red-Foot Zeff's restaurant. Also, they offered him booze.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 59,995
- Chapters:
- 25/?
- Comments:
- 1,513
- Kudos:
- 3,085
- Bookmarks:
- 609
- Hits:
- 66,664
Bookmarked by Elasmith
15 May 2026
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“I need a date.”
Sanji’s head bats back and forth between the kitchen and the galley. He’s got Zoro pressed up against a wall, forcefully, unlike whatever song and dance Zoro was playing with the rando outside. Sanji fists Zoro’s long coat and looks him dead in the eyes. Well, eye.
Zoro blinks owlishly at him, the vein clear on his forehead for all of a second while he processes Sanji’s declaration. “You want to date me?”
“What? No—” Sanji could vomit from the absurdity. He’s one step away from strangling Zoro with his own haramaki. His cheeks burn, and even he knows how stupid he sounds, but there isn’t a universe out there that exists where he sounds dumber than Mosshead. So, his jaw tightens. “If we do this, I need a date.”
“Okay,” Zoro says, “so, like, a fluffer—?”
“NO!”
--
Zoro says they can fuck around so long as they don't make it weird. They both, of course, proceed to make it weird.
Series
- Part 1 of that frou frou shit
Bookmarked by Elasmith
05 May 2026
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“In town they say the woods are full of magic,” Zoro recalled, thinking of the stories Usopp loved to spin when he'd had more than a single ale. “Think if we stepped over, we’d be in a faerie ring?”
“Who’s to say we aren’t already?” Curly’s smile was enigmatic, a flicker of something sharp and full of secrets behind his teeth. “Maybe the world’s out there and we’re on the other side.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,460
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 125
- Kudos:
- 1,201
- Bookmarks:
- 305
- Hits:
- 10,610
Bookmarked by Elasmith
21 Apr 2026
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After a long regular season of hockey and an even more grueling postseason, Sanji’s finally done it. He carried the Germa Raiders in a 4-1 victory over the Windmill City Pirates, earning them the Stanley Cup. He’s finished. He’s won.
Unfortunately for him, Pirates defenseman Roronoa Zoro is too damn stubborn to lose, stubborn enough to bend time itself to his will. Sanji’s forced to relive the Stanley Cup Finals, over and over again, until he finds a way to grind the man’s willpower into dust.
Series
- Part 1 of Hockey Time Loop
Bookmarked by Elasmith
20 Apr 2026
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Summary
After being forced to live with an injured Zoro while stranded together on an inhabited island, Sanji finds his feelings of animosity slowly changing into something else entirely. Which might be easier to swallow if he could get some decent sleep.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 68,099
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Comments:
- 599
- Kudos:
- 2,662
- Bookmarks:
- 665
- Hits:
- 41,072
Bookmarked by Elasmith
14 Apr 2026
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you get lost in the ocean by ThirtySixSaveFiles
Fandoms: One Piece (Live Action TV 2023)
15 Jun 2025
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Summary
It’s not a haunting if the person’s body is still alive, right? It’s not quite possession if Sanji’s still in charge of his own. If it was done, it can be undone. This is some kind of nightmare; Sanji just has to wake up. Sanji looks down at Zoro’s still, sleeping body and tells himself all of those things are true.
___Zoro and Sanji have to learn to occupy the same body — and figure out how to get Zoro back into his own.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 16,573
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 130
- Kudos:
- 1,328
- Bookmarks:
- 353
- Hits:
- 10,686
Bookmarked by Elasmith
09 Apr 2026
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"No 'fair'; no fouls; no rules," Sanji sing-songs at him.
Which (and Sanji should really, really, be at least this self-aware) is an incredibly dangerous thing for someone like the cook to say.
*
Or: the one where Zoro and Sanji hash out the unspoken rules of their little contests. On the floor. Horizontally. (Not an entendre.)
Bookmarked by Elasmith
06 Apr 2026
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Left with only three other crew mates, it’s a ready expectation that Sanji will start fawning all over Robin in his usual obnoxious way. However, that’s not what happens. Instead, looking wild around the eyes in a way only someone who knows him well would recognize, the cook doesn’t break stride until he’s firmly within Zoro’s orbit and can wrap both hands around his upper arm, clinging tight.
“Hi, darling,” he chirps, his expression desperately conveying that Zoro needs to play along under pain of death. “Did you miss me?”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 32,145
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 1,695
- Kudos:
- 32,172
- Bookmarks:
- 7,140
- Hits:
- 382,904
Bookmarked by Elasmith
02 Apr 2026
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“Say,” Sanji says to Nami, leaning backwards against the wood top while watching the frankly fascinating scene playing out at the other end of the bar, “is Zoro…being flirted with?”
“Yeah,” she says as if it isn’t anything new.
In which Sanji stumbles into some realizations and then proceeds to enact a multi-step plan of subtle romance. Meanwhile, Zoro suspects the waiter is out to kill him.
Alternatively: First rate cook Sanji’s guide on how to sneakily coax a feral ship cat into some spoiling
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,030
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 228
- Kudos:
- 5,396
- Bookmarks:
- 909
- Hits:
- 42,076
Bookmarked by Elasmith
31 Mar 2026
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On Sight by Blasphemyandtheboys
Fandoms: One Piece (Anime & Manga), One Piece (Live Action TV 2023)
23 Nov 2024
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Zoro didn't mean to kill the drunk guy who climbed through his window at 3 AM, honest. Deciding to dispose of the body, however, was definitely on purpose.
Turns out the bastard was his new neighbor, and very much still alive. Talk about first impressions.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 26,564
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Comments:
- 283
- Kudos:
- 2,064
- Bookmarks:
- 462
- Hits:
- 24,213
Bookmarked by Elasmith
30 Mar 2026
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Counting Ships by blatantblue
Fandoms: One Piece (Anime & Manga), One Piece (Live Action TV 2023)
16 Jun 2024
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Summary
When Roronoa Zoro first met Sanji, with his shiny cufflinks, cinched-waist jacket, and artfully curled fringe, he thought: Maybe.
***
Zoro struggles with his sexuality, and Sanji struggles with sleep.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 20,894
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Comments:
- 154
- Kudos:
- 2,036
- Bookmarks:
- 355
- Hits:
- 25,436
Bookmarked by Elasmith
28 Mar 2026
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Summary
You're very good at your job, and even better at keeping your distance from the shadier side of the undercity. Until the most powerful man in the Lanes suddenly needs a favor, and your world gets a lot more complicated.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 57,508
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Comments:
- 203
- Kudos:
- 1,236
- Bookmarks:
- 219
- Hits:
- 21,013
Bookmarked by Elasmith
29 Nov 2025
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Summary
Malfoy comes back to school different in their Sixth Year. Harry thinks he's become a Death Eater. But Hermione senses there's something more disturbing going on. After all, why would Malfoy be staring at her so intently? (Possessed!Draco)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 71,769
- Chapters:
- 24/?
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,489
- Kudos:
- 4,343
- Bookmarks:
- 1,109
- Hits:
- 119,452
Bookmarked by Elasmith
13 Oct 2025
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Summary
“No,” Jaskier sighed. “This is the thing, Geralt. I’m middle-aged and tired and I just think I’d rather meet death sitting down and facing it rather than from behind while I’m running. You know?” He contemplated that a moment, and finally added, “Especially if it’s you.”
Set after the end of season 1.
UPDATE: The Fat Baby song in chapter 7 now exists here as composed and recorded by @fannishliss and is BRILLIANT.
See Series Notes on this series for a list of all the fics and what chronological order they go in, as well as recommended reading order if you're into that, just so you know what you're getting into here.
Series
- Part 1 of Meet Death Sitting
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 46,086
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 766
- Kudos:
- 3,398
- Bookmarks:
- 543
- Hits:
- 40,044
Bookmarked by Elasmith
01 Oct 2025
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Summary
Jaskier doesn’t actually know how much time has passed since the black-cloaked Nilfgaardians grab him after a performance in a shitty tavern in the backcountry of northern Kaedwen. He’d assumed--foolishly, apparently--that he was far enough north that any Nilfgaardian soldiers would be few and far between, likely just scouts or even deserters. It would have been hard to actually get any further north--the little backwater town where he’d been singing was just a day from the mountains. Anymore travel, and he’d find himself skirting the Trail up to Kaer Morhen, the Warlord’s Keep, and, well. He’s brazen, but not that brazen.
(or: a wandering bard bites off more than he can chew with the political ballads, accidentally makes friends with a princess in exile, and finds the Warlord of the North in his debt.)
Series
- Part 1 of the roads we walk
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 67,217
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Comments:
- 918
- Kudos:
- 11,766
- Bookmarks:
- 2,876
- Hits:
- 199,167
Bookmarked by Elasmith
30 Sep 2025
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Hope Is A Fire by boopboop
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV)
01 Apr 2022
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Summary
Geralt and Jaskier learn to navigate their budding relationship as they travel across the continent trying to avoid deranged cultists, murderous mages, and the odd kick up the arse from Destiny.
Geralt just wants to keep Jaskier safe.
And Jaskier? He's trying really hard to not accidentally end the world.
Series
- Part 2 of In and out of darkness
Bookmarked by Elasmith
26 Sep 2025
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Soft Deceitful Wiles by boopboop
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV)
17 Mar 2022
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Summary
The monsters win, and the man who is supposed to help mother slay them turns out to be the biggest monster of all.
Ten years later, a Witcher lurks in the dark corner of a shitty tavern, a stolen broach dangling from the hilt of his sword like a trophy.
Ten years later, Julian still remembers everything he’s been taught. By mother, by the men in his family, and especially by monsters.
“You must have some review for me,” he says, a gleaming smile one that’s been sharpened to perfection with years of tutelage. “Three words or less.”
---------------
Jaskier is Renfri's son, and ten years is plenty of time to prepare a suitable punishment for the Butcher of Blaviken.
Series
- Part 1 of In and out of darkness
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 22,945
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Comments:
- 349
- Kudos:
- 2,018
- Bookmarks:
- 433
- Hits:
- 22,865
Bookmarked by Elasmith
26 Sep 2025
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don't tell me we've grown (for having loved) by SummerFrost
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV)
03 Jul 2020
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Summary
According to Jaskier, they've lived this day almost a hundred times. Geralt doesn't remember any of them.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 34,617
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 7
- Comments:
- 627
- Kudos:
- 8,044
- Bookmarks:
- 2,484
- Hits:
- 72,941
Bookmarked by Elasmith
09 Sep 2025
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Don't Look a Gift Goblin in the Mouth by SummerFrost
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV)
14 May 2020
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Summary
“No, I’m serious, I really do have like, uh—a goblin… thing… in my house!” Jaskier insists. “Will you come take a look at it? I don’t want it to, I don’t know, eat my liver or something?”
Geralt massages at his temple. “Very few monsters are that picky. It would probably just eat all of you.”
Aka: The one where Jaskier hires Geralt to investigate a monster in his house, and the outcome is somehow better and worse than Geralt expects.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,232
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 151
- Kudos:
- 4,053
- Bookmarks:
- 641
- Hits:
- 16,866
Bookmarked by Elasmith
09 Sep 2025
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A United Front by didoandis
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV)
27 Apr 2021
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Summary
“The only solution is a united front,” Yennefer says. When this just prompts blank expressions, she sighs. “Honestly, do I have to spell it out? I mean the two of you should get married.”
Geralt stares at her. Jaskier’s mouth drops open. Tissaia says, thoughtfully, “that could actually work.”
“No it couldn’t!” Jaskier says, loud and shrill.
After Calanthe and Eist are killed, the fate of Cintra hangs in the balance. The only solution is an alliance between two men: the witcher Geralt of Rivia, bound to the princess by the Law of Surprise, and Cirilla’s uncle Julian, better known as Jaskier the bard.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 29,619
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Comments:
- 435
- Kudos:
- 3,143
- Bookmarks:
- 701
- Hits:
- 29,401
Bookmarked by Elasmith
08 Sep 2025