autisticacebee
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"Don’t worry Chopper,” Nami pipes in, stretching her legs lazily as she slouches back against her sunlounge, “None of that stuff happened anyway.”
“Huh? Then how did you guys meet?”
“Well, the part about the Black Cat pirates and Kuro was true, but that’s about it.”
“Who’s Kuro?” The question comes from their captain, who speaks around a mouthful of food and promptly gags on a swallowed bone.
Nami sighs, all too used to her captain’s disgusting behaviours and selective memory. “The cat butler from Usopp’s village.” She cringes as her captain reaches his fingers down his own throat to pull out the lodged bone. “He tried to kill you.”
“GOLDEN POOP SUIT?”
“HUH?!”
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The Strawhats speak and sing of first meetings
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“This one, as I’m sure you know, is a yellow rose. They are symbols of friendship, and in different cultures people will gift them to close friends for birthdays. In flower language, they can mean ‘I love you,’ ‘I care for you,’ and ‘Your friendship is important to me.’” She gives Usopp a meaningful look.
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Sanji slams the knife flat onto the bench. “I- ya know, the whole thing was kinda stupid, wasn’t it?” he stammers, waving his now free hand in front of him as he violently shakes his head. “I mean. It’s just. it was so avoidable you know? It was just a miscommunication issue! I just. I didn’t!” He runs his hand through his fringe in frustration, “I didn’t want you to leave the crew.”
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The stawhats love and appreciate their resident sniper, in their own unique ways
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He is not like the others. He is not a genius like the archaeologist, navigator or reindeer. He is not a monster like the chef, her charge, or the captain. He is a skilled sniper, a talented artist, a strategist, and a craftsman. And that’s enough. Until it isn’t.
"Don't give up on the Merry!" He cries.
“Don't give up on me.” She hears.
“If you're gonna throw away the Merry, you might as well throw me away too.” His tone is embittered but his voice is soft, resigned. Better to do it now, he must think, than agonise over when they’ll be done with me.
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Follow Wado, Kitetsu, Yubashiri, Shusui and Enma as they love, rage, hunger, pity, fear, trust, and grow
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They were stronger than anticipated.
Hoarded wealth. A vindictive ruler. Starving children. Citizens forced to fight a pointless war.
It didn’t take long for Luffy to get involved.
A small child pleading for her father as she was beaten to the ground.
No, Luffy didn’t wait at all.
Maybe he should have.
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Before he fully realises what he's doing, Mike is swooping in, hands reaching to gently cup Wills cheek, light enough that he can pull away, but firm enough to convey how much he doesn't want him to.
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Zoro knows what he likes. What he likes clearly doesn't know him.
Bookmarked by autisticacebee
08 Jul 2026
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Clueless by GoalsIncludeProcrastination
Fandoms: One Piece (Anime & Manga), One Piece (Live Action TV 2023)
17 Feb 2026
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“You offered Robin a drink?” Sanji got straight to the point.
“Yeah, so?” Zoro blinked back at him.
“Well-“ Sanji spluttered, put off by the nonchalance, “-what the hell are you trying to do?!”
“Get her a drink. I thought that was pretty obvious!” Zoro’s voice rose in sync with Sanji, people were starting to stare. Least of all their crew, who’d seen this before and knew exactly where it lead.
“Should we- ?” Nami leaned toward Robin as she watched.
“Give it a minute, they’ll never learn to deescalate if we step in every time.”
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In which just about everyone in the crew knows that Roronoa Zoro is gay, except for Sanji, and the nonsense miscommunication that ensues because of it.
Series
- Part 1 of Clueless
Bookmarked by autisticacebee
30 Jun 2026
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Gender-Gender Devil Fruit by GoalsIncludeProcrastination
Fandoms: One Piece (Anime & Manga), One Piece (Live Action TV 2023)
03 Mar 2026
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“Nami-swan! Where in all the seas did you find this beautiful friend of yours? We simply must get acquainted, my god, that gorgeous hair of yours puts emeralds to shame. What a vision- a spirit of Mother Nature’s endless beauty you are~ My name is Sanji but really you can call me whatever you like,” The cook bowed low and held out a hand for the object of his affections, undeterred by the blank stare he was getting in return.
A feline grin was curling up Nami’s lips, letting Sanji be done before introducing them. “This is Zoro.”
“What about him?” Sanji huffed irritably, looking up at Nami, who then pointed to the person in front of Sanji, whose blank stare had graduated to a glare.
“Is this how you greet women, shit cook?” The feminine voice spoke, making Sanji’s jaw drop in horror.
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Zoro gets hit by a devil fruit user that turns him into a woman. Sanji is very bad at handling it.
Bookmarked by autisticacebee
30 Jun 2026
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Baby Bird by GoalsIncludeProcrastination
Fandoms: One Piece (Anime & Manga), One Piece (Live Action TV 2023)
01 Apr 2026
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“-Zoro lost his ability to regulate his temperature. He won’t sweat, shiver, or be able to tell when he’s too hot or too cold. When he fought Luffy he pushed himself to hyperthermia without realising, and the heatstroke made him faint. Maintaining that temperature could cause heart and kidney failure, then major damage to his brain, and even-“ Chopper squeaked as he made eye contact with Zoro, who was giving him a disapproving look while he rolled the thermometer between his teeth with his tongue.
“We all know Mosshead doesn’t have the brain cells to spare getting brain damage, so what do we do?” Sanji piped up, earning a growl from Zoro across the room.
“There’s no solution quite like skin to skin contact. Hugs with as few layers as you’re comfortable with. Just like a baby bird!”
Sanji snorted, trying to reconcile the fuming swordsman with any kind of cute baby animal. Especially when Zoro looked like he was debating homicide or suicide, but it would surely be one of them.
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Or, touch-starved and emotionally constipated Roronoa Zoro has to get hugs from his Nakama or he'll die.
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- English
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Bookmarked by autisticacebee
30 Jun 2026
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Blackleg Sanji VS. the Secrets of his own Heart by RealDarkHeart
Fandoms: One Piece (Anime & Manga)
02 Jun 2026
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Summary
Sanji frowns. “Of course you don’t understand the importance of a grand romance.”
“Yeah and I don’t want to, it’s a total waste of time.”
“So you never want to be in a relationship ever?”If it isn’t you, no.
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Or: Sanji having one mental breakdown after another, and Zoro being completely oblivious to the fact that his hopeless pining is no longer one-sided.Bookmarked by autisticacebee
27 Jun 2026