Chapter Text
Dan really should have seen it coming. He always should have, every time. He should have that shit mapped out on a calendar --really he should have it memorised by now, or at least have some idea of when it happened, the general time of month, but no, he never bothered to think about it, or if he did he was too lazy to make note of it, so it always took him by surprise. It was ridiculous really, how much he could completely space it and not connect the dots when he’d been up all night clutching his stomach and vainly struggling to ease the discomfort, after a few days of not feeling one hundred percent and not being able to really put his finger on the reason why, eventually chalking it up to the usual dissatisfaction with the with the universe and all its complexities. At least this time he was at home --alone even, as Phil had gone off to some party with Louise, after quite a bit of reluctance to leave Dan behind an account of his not feeling well but Dan had insisted and Phil had also thought of the restlessness as something existentially, in which case he knew to give Dan time to think himself out of the tangled mess he’d thought himself into before providing a bit of quiet comfort and distraction, and it was only for the day.
It was one of the better situations that Dan had been in, a few of the worst being the time he’d been on the underground, with Alphas literally all around him, eyeing him smugly and making lewd comments, or in the taxi when he’d soaked through his jeans and into the seat, and thank god the driver was a beta; he didn’t know how he would have gotten out of that otherwise. So yeah, he’d had a few close calls, but it seemed his luck had finally turned, because this time he was laying in his own bed, wrapped in his own blankets, with his own bathroom just down the hall, when the first bit of slick leaked into his underwear.
Still, he panicked --it was basically instinct after getting so used to going into heat surrounded by very real threats, and he sat very still, fingers hovering over the keys of the laptop resting on his legs and willing himself to be utterly unnoticeable, until he felt the fluids soaking through his pajama bottoms, sticking the fabric cold and wet against the backs of his thighs, and fully realised where he was. He let the breath rush out from his chest, feeling most of the tension go along with it, and picked up the laptop to set it aside before pulling the blankets over his legs and scrambling out of the bed. Inspecting the damage, he found a much larger wet spot on the sheet than he would have expected, even knowing but it wasn’t all that surprising considering the viable swimming pool in his underwear. It was gross. But more importantly, it meant that he probably wouldn’t have much time before he was a useless mess. He checked his phone, tapping through his messages and then Twitter, misclicking a few times because his hands were so shaky, but there was no indication that Phil would be back anytime soon.
“Okay..”
Dan pushed another steadying breath through his nose, and then he started pulling the sheet up at the corners, bundling it up in his arms and carrying it over to the laundry basket at the other side of the room. Then he went to the bathroom, grabbed a small stack of fresh towels from the cabinet, dumped them onto one side of his bed. He slipped his fingers under the waistband of his pajama bottoms, and that of the boxers underneath them, trying to move quickly and efficiently enough not to feel the shivers that the contact painted over his skin, or the tightening of the knot resting low in his stomach as he stripped himself of the clothing.
Completely bare and over-sensitized, though, he couldn’t resist letting his hands wander just a bit, down his stomach and then up along his thighs, making his whole body tense and twitch. He dropped to his knees on the mattress, holding himself up with one hand and reaching behind himself with the other to touch two of his fingers to his dripping entrance, crying out raggedly as they came into contact with his aching flesh, and then letting them sink into his slick heat, biting down on his lip as his head jerked to the side.
It was a few moments of panting and rocking against his hand before he managed to pull it away, a few more to get his body to stop shaking enough to stand, and then he was stumbling back to the bathroom to try continue his attempt at some form of productivity. It seemed just a bit counter-intuitive to shower right before the worst of the mess hit, but it seemed like a pretty good idea at the moment and might help douse the feverish warmth bubbling under his skin. For that purpose, he ran the water a bit on the cooler side, a stark contrast from his standard showers of scorching temperatures. It was like ice against his burning skin, and it worked to calm the unease in his stomach when the shock of it had passed. He tried to relax a little bit, letting the humid air open up his chest and loosen the tension there, and he managed to breathe deeply and evenly for a few calm minutes while wiping up the sticky slick from the inside of his thighs with a washcloth and then scrubbing some shampoo into his hair. His arms were starting to get tired, though, and his movements got increasingly sluggish with every knead of his fingers against his scalp. The tiled wall held more and more of his weight as his body slumped against it, and he felt himself curling in and pushing back just slightly as the water running over him felt more and more sensual. When his breathing had reverted to short little pants and he was shaking with the effort it took just not to collapse, it was pretty clear that he couldn’t put it off any longer.
Fumbling slightly with the faucet, he shut off the water and tripped out of the shower, the growing urgency of need propelling his awkward limbs too quickly for his water-logged brain to keep up with. He found himself moving in that haphazard way toward Phil’s room, the promise of the Alpha’s scent too enticing to resist, atm.
It was so great, Phil’s scent. It was so warm and homey, always welcoming, always making Dan feel like he belonged. But it was also hot, all earth and musk, most noticeably when they’d just woken up --tangled in the blankets and each other, with Phil wrapped almost completely around him and nuzzling his neck, or his hair, and their combined scents forming a sort of cushiony bubble around them, raw and honest and heated, even when all they’d done was sleep, and it made warmth curl in the pit of his stomach, extending out all the way to his toes and lighting him up inside-- or in those moments when they were just talking talking --maybe filming a video, or sitting on the couch watching anime, or having a night in and eating dinner together like a proper mated pair-- and there would be this little pause, this lull in the conversation that somehow felt really sort of blatant and kind of awkward but just really natural at the same time.
They’d be staring a bit too long, one or the other of them probably starting it a moment before --usually Dan, because Phil was wonderful, and beautiful, and he couldn’t help himself-- and the other catching their eye and returning it, and Phil would have this really soft, really caring, little smile, and Dan would just be grinning like an idiot, and it would all just be really light and good and happy in one moment, and then..still good, but just, different, because Phil’s expression would shift just a micrometer, into something sort of knowing, even though it didn’t really look different at all, and Dan would just know, would feel it coming off of him in waves of heat and lust --not just for his body but for him-- and then he’d just stop, just shift back into whatever they’d been doing, and Dan would, as always, follow his lead, trying to act like nothing had happened and he was not hot and squirming just from Phil looking at him.
It was like a game they played, or more like one Phil played with Dan, letting his eyes communicate everything he would do to him and then leaving him restless and needy, just going through the day as normal, until either Phil decided it had been long enough, or Dan physically couldn’t take the tension anymore and took some form of action himself, like randomly jumping Phil in the hall, or going into his room and spreading himself out until Phil heard or smelled what he was doing. Either way, it always ended up the same way, whether Dan was bent over the couch, or pressed up against the wall, or set on the bed on his hands and knees, with his Alpha’s cock filling him up so fucking nice.
Those were Dan’s favorite times, when it felt like the whole word outside their door just faded and nothing else mattered but that they were together, and that was enough --that was always enough, for Dan.
Right now, though, he just wished Phil would fucking hurry up. He’d made it to Phil’s bed, wrapping himself in the sheet when he realized he’d left the towels back in his room and then burrowing into the blankets, smothering himself in Phil’s scent. It seemed to soothe the physical ache, but it also hurt in a way, being reminded so strongly of a comfort that was absent, now, when he needed it most. For better or worse, the loneliness was quickly drowned out by a fresh onslaught of hot desperation, and he groaned, getting pretty sick of the waiting game.