Archive of Our Own

The first thing Trevor noticed was that Alucard looked tired. They were all tired, of course - they'd just fought Dracula - but the weariness in Alucard was a bone-deep thing that had little to do with exertion and a great deal to do with grief. He'd slept for a year, Trevor remembered. To him, it was like he'd only just lost his mother, and now he'd lost his father as well. He'd killed him; maybe they'd all played a part, but Alucard had been the one to shove the stake through his father's chest.

He was, predictably, dramatic with his statement about his plan. He was also, if Trevor wasn't mistaken, limping slightly on the second set of stairs without a banister to hold onto. He'd fought with Dracula in close quarters more than either Trevor or Sypha, but he'd also disappeared into the castle once Dracula was dead, so while Trevor and Sypha had patched each other up, Alucard's injuries remained unknown.

"I can't just leave it here," Alucard said, not meeting Trevor or Sypha's eyes. "It'd be nothing but a grave to be robbed."

A bad feeling started to curdle in Trevor's stomach.

"So," Alucard said, lifting his head and opening his eyes, "let it be my grave."

"No," Trevor said before he could even really think about it.

Alucard tilted his head in confusion. "No?"

"No," Trevor repeated. A few ideas flitted through his head - he could appeal to Alucard's sense of duty and tell him he had to protect the castle properly, he could point out the vacuum in the vampire hierarchy and suggest Alucard fill it, he could give Alucard the Belmont Hold and tell him to restore it - but in the end, he latched onto the simplest one. "We're not leaving you here alone."

Alucard looked at him for a long moment, visibly surprised. Trevor was fairly certain he could see a glimpse of hope there too, though.

"You can't mean to stay."

"If you're staying, we'll stay with you," Trevor replied. "If you want to leave, we'll leave with you. We can figure out a way to keep the castle and the Hold safe. You don't have to stay here forever."

"I- I don't-"

"Alucard," Sypha said, her voice achingly gentle, "do you want to be alone?"

"I-"

"He doesn't-"

"Alucard," Sypha repeated, her voice a bit firmer, "do you want to be alone?"

Alucard looked from Sypha to Trevor and back again, something almost desperate sparking in his eyes, and then he whispered, "No."

It was as if the word had broken a dam in him; it sent Alucard to his knees, and his breathing shuddered as tears sprang to his eyes. Sypha knelt by him immediately, and she opened her arms, and Alucard collapsed into them, sobbing. He cried quietly, Trevor couldn't help but notice; nothing but little gasps and choked sounds. Trevor wondered if Alucard had cried like that at night in their camp, while he and Sypha were asleep, quiet enough that he wouldn't wake them. He wondered what he would have done if Alucard had woken him.

Slowly, he knelt beside Sypha and Alucard and laid a hand on Alucard's shoulder.

Alucard made a wounded little noise, the loudest one so far, then his gasps took on a different tone, another one that Trevor recognized. He was trying to pull himself together, and Trevor squeezed his shoulder lightly as Alucard dragged in a few rattling breaths and then finally lifted his head again.

"You cannot wish to stay here," he said, his voice rasping over the words. "This castle is- It's a tomb."

"It's a bit of a mess," Sypha replied diplomatically, "but it's nothing we can't clean."

"Clean?" Alucard repeated, a note of hysteria in his voice. "It's a deathtrap. It's a disaster."

"It was your home," Trevor said. He'd noticed the toys in the room where they'd killed Dracula, the constellations painted onto the ceiling. It was a child's room, and as far as Trevor knew, only one child had ever lived in Dracula's castle. "If that makes you want to leave, that's okay. But if it makes you want to stay, that's also okay."

Alucard looked up at Trevor helplessly. "My mother played with me in these halls, and my father tried to kill me in them."

Sypha winced, but Trevor didn't take his eyes off of Alucard. "You're probably right that we shouldn't just leave the castle open and unguarded. But if you don't want to stay, we don't have to."

"I don't know," Alucard whispered. "They burned my mother's house in Lupu. This is all I have left of her. But- My father-"

"Do you have good memories of him here?" Sypha asked. "He… He wasn't all cruelty, was he? He loved your mother."

Even though Sypha didn't speak the words, Trevor could clearly hear her follow-up question, and he imagined Alucard could too: Did he love you?

Alucard had said some things about Dracula that made Trevor think, as strange as it was to think of Dracula loving anyone, that he had indeed loved his son. On the other hand, Alucard had a scar across his chest that seemed to imply something different.

"He could be… kind," Alucard said. "I imagine it must be hard to believe, given all that he's done, but he could be gentle. Until my mother… He was a good father."

Trevor had the feeling the past tense wasn't just because Dracula was dead.

"Sypha was right," Trevor said. "If you're… mourning him, that's okay. He was your father."

Alucard closed his eyes, slumping forward like a man with the weight of the world on his shoulders. "I don't know what to do."

"Welcome to the club," Trevor replied.

Sypha shot him a look. "We can figure out a way to ward the castle against strangers, and then we can decide if we stay or not. There has to be something in the Hold or your father's library, doesn't there?"

"The collected knowledge of both halves of your heritage," Trevor added to Alucard in an aside.

"And we can keep staying in the Hold, if that would make you feel more comfortable."

They'd slept in the Hold the night before, after killing Dracula. At least, Trevor and Sypha had; Alucard had gone down with them, but he hadn't been there when they woke up. Given the look on his face, Trevor doubted he'd slept at all.

"There are plenty of bedrooms in the castle," Alucard said, his voice a bit dull. "They'd likely be more comfortable than the Hold."

"What would you rather do?" Sypha asked gently.

Alucard let out a humorless laugh. "I doubt I will sleep much, either way."

"You can wake us, if you can't sleep."

"You need your rest." Alucard didn't meet her eyes. "I need less than a normal human."

"Dhampirs do still need to sleep, though, right?" Trevor asked. "Even full vampires sleep."

"I can manage."

"Do you think you would sleep better if you were not alone?"

Alucard looked at Sypha in shock. "What are you suggesting?"

"Is there any room in this castle with a bed big enough for three?"

Trevor couldn't help but mirror Alucard's shock. "Three? All three of us?"

"Oh, come on," Sypha huffed. "We've been traveling together for long enough that you shouldn't feel the need to worry about my virtue anymore. Besides, I'm not some noblewoman, I'm a Speaker. We don't have the same hang-ups that you do about men and women sharing the same space."

"Sharing the same space is different than sharing the same bed," Alucard countered, and Trevor noticed that the surprise made him sound very nearly normal. "It- It wouldn't-"

"What? It wouldn't be 'proper'? What is proper about traveling together in a wagon to kill Dracula, exactly? We haven't been proper this whole time. There's no point in starting now."

"Whoa, who says Alucard and I have agreed to this anyway?" Trevor countered. "Maybe my problem isn't with propriety at all. Maybe I just don't want to share a bed with you two."

"Well, you will have to take a bath first, no matter where you sleep," Sypha told him firmly. "Alucard, do you know if there are any clothes here that would fit Trevor? What he's wearing now desperately needs to be washed."

"I could likely find something," Alucard replied. "And… there are likely beds that would fit all three of us, although I'm not certain if they're in any condition to sleep in."

"You're going along with her, then?" Trevor asked ruefully. He was bad enough at saying no to Sypha as it was; he wouldn't have a chance if Alucard had already said yes.

"I hardly see any point in going against her," Alucard countered, and something about the look in his eyes made Trevor think he didn't really want to anyway. Maybe Sypha had a point with all this. Maybe Alucard did just need company.

"Alucard's right," Sypha declared firmly. "There's no point in going against me. And right now, we're all going to wash ourselves and change into fresh clothes so we can wash what we're wearing later. Then we can figure out what to do next."

"I can show you to the baths," Alucard said. "And I can find something that would fit you both."

"Baths?" Trevor repeated. "Do you have some sort of fancy bathing chamber or something?"

For an instant, he thought he saw amusement flicker across Alucard's face. "Something like that."

"Then let's go," Sypha declared. She stood, then she held out her hands for Alucard and Trevor. "The sooner Trevor cleans up, the sooner we don't have to smell him anymore."

"Oi! I'm not that much worse than you two."

"Yes, you keep telling yourself that."

"Well, Alucard's got a fancy bathing chamber, so I won't be worse than you after that."

"Yes, maybe if we clean you up enough, we'll even find a man under all that dirt," Sypha agreed. She looked over at Alucard. "Can you lead the way?"

"Certainly," Alucard replied, standing in a movement that wasn't quite as fluid as usual. Trevor was pretty sure he had hurt his leg somehow. Given the beating Dracula had given him, it wasn't much of a surprise.

"Hey," Trevor said, reaching for Alucard in a move that seemed to surprise the others as much as he surprised himself. "You're not going to disappear on us again, are you? Like you did last night?"

Alucard blinked at him. "I beg your pardon?"

"Last night," Trevor said, because he'd never been one to back down once he'd started something. "We all went down to the Hold together, and then you disappeared. And you didn't let us help you with your wounds. We're not doing that shit again today."

"I hardly can, if we're going to sleep in the same bed tonight," Alucard countered, but something about his tone sounded evasive to Trevor.

"I don't think we should let Alucard out of our sight," he told Sypha.

Alucard spluttered. "I- Belmont-"

"I think you might be right," Sypha agreed. "What did you do to your leg, Alucard?"

"What- Nothing! And you can't possibly intend to do away with privacy entirely when we're about to bathe."

Sypha shrugged. "I've seen a naked man before. It's nothing new to me."

"We'll all go find clothes together," Trevor said, "and then we'll all go to the bathing chamber together, and then we'll all find a room together. We do our best work together, after all."

"I hardly think finding clothes and bathing will be something that requires such preparation."

"We're in Dracula's fucking castle. I vote on being prepared for anything."

"We can all take care of each other," Sypha told Alucard, reaching for his hand. "Now, come on, let's go get cleaned up. A bath sounds heavenly."

Alucard looked down at Sypha's hand in his, then he visibly swallowed and nodded. "Very well. This way, then."

Sypha snatched Trevor's hand too, as they started towards whatever room Alucard thought they'd find clothes in. Trevor didn't pull away. He hadn't lied when he said they were best together. He also hadn't lied when he said he wanted to be ready for anything, no matter how quiet and abandoned the castle seemed.

He didn't know how long they'd end up staying. He just knew they couldn't leave Alucard alone, not if they wanted him to still be alive and whole when they came back. And if they had to beat that care into Alucard's head…

Well, together they'd killed Dracula. Getting his son to take care of himself should be a piece of cake.

Speakers were not made to stay in the same place for too long. Sypha understood why other people had stationary homes, and sometimes she even thought she could see the appeal of them, at least somewhat, but she didn't think she could stay in one place for her whole life. Before they'd even killed Dracula, she'd wanted to keep traveling with Trevor and Alucard after their task was done, and she'd planned a whole speech to convince them.

She hadn't seen Alucard's grim statement coming. She especially hadn't seen Trevor's flat refusal coming, but she liked that a lot more. They weren't going to leave Alucard alone, especially not to die. They'd been through too much to split up now. And if that meant Sypha had to stay in one place for a while, then so be it.

Sypha kept a firm grip on both Alucard and Trevor's hands as Alucard led them through the castle to what appeared to be some sort of guest room. "I believe one of my father's Forgemasters was staying here," Alucard said as he led them inside. "His things should fit us, if I've estimated properly. Belmont, you might need something larger, but I believe the other Forgemaster was staying in the next room over, and his clothes seem a bit bigger."

"Do you know what happened to the Forgemasters?" Sypha asked, looking around the room.

"One of them was in the castle when we attacked, but he's not here now, and I didn't see his remains anywhere. I imagine he must have escaped at some point, perhaps through my father's distance mirror. And I don't believe the other was in the castle when it arrived here, so he must have been left behind in Brăila."

"Do you think their night creatures will stop coming after us now that the Forgemasters aren't working with Dracula anymore?" Trevor asked.

"Unfortunately, they'll likely keep attacking, although perhaps more randomly than before. A night creature under the control of their Forgemaster can follow a plan. A night creature on their own is less likely to."

"What are the Forgemasters' names?" Sypha asked. When both men looked at her in askance, she added, "If I'm going to wear a man's clothes, I'd like to know his name."

"Their names are Hector and Isaac," Alucard said after a moment. "Hector was the one who stayed here, and Isaac next door."

"They have to be human, right?" Trevor asked. "Vampires can't forge night creatures, that's human magic."

"They are," Alucard agreed. "I… don't know why they agreed to work with my father, but given that night creatures are loyal to their Forgemasters, it was either of their own free will or they were somehow enchanted."

"Should we be expecting them to take revenge?" Sypha asked.

"I… don't know. With all the vampires who died between here and Brăila, everything will be a mess for a while. I don't know if Hector and Isaac are the type to take advantage of that." Alucard's face twisted slightly. "There are others who are, certainly, but I don't know if they survived Brăila."

"So, we might be safe, or we might be fucked," Trevor summed up.

"I wouldn't have put it like that, but essentially yes."

"Well, no one's likely to come quite yet, and I want a bath," Sypha declared. "Alucard, where are the clothes?"

Alucard stepped towards a large wooden wardrobe, then looked back at Sypha. "Are you going to let go of my hand?"

"No, I don't think so," Sypha replied. "I don't want you going anywhere, after all."

Alucard looked at her, slightly bemused, and then looked over at Trevor, who shrugged. He turned back to Sypha and tried, "Surely you don't have to hold onto me. You and Belmont already decided to keep an eye on me. Is that not enough?"

Sypha considered it for a moment, then she let go of Alucard's hand. "We don't have to hold hands while we're both in here. Once we leave the room, though, we're holding hands again."

"You could simply take my word for it that I will not leave," Alucard suggested.

"Can't trust a vampire," Trevor replied immediately. "We're sticking with you."

"He's right," Sypha agreed. "Not about the not trusting vampires thing, but about us sticking with you. You're not getting rid of us so easily, Alucard. Anyway, you already told me you don't want to be alone."

"Had I known you two would stick quite this close to me, perhaps I would have answered otherwise," Alucard replied, but Sypha didn't believe it for a second. Alucard didn't want to be alone, she could tell, but he wouldn't have asked them to stay. It didn't seem like he'd expected them to offer either. They'd just have to prove that they weren't going anywhere without him.

"Well, you already answered, so you're stuck with us now," Sypha said. "Let's get some clothes and go take a nice bath. How big are the baths here, Alucard?"

"There are some sizable ones," Alucard replied, digging through the wardrobe. "Here. These may be a bit large on you, Sypha, but they should fit well enough."

"Why are you getting out two sets of clothes?" Trevor asked.

Alucard looked at him in confusion. "One set for Sypha, and one for myself."

"Isn't this your house?" Trevor asked. "Don't you have your own clothes here?"

Alucard froze, and Sypha suddenly remembered the room they'd found him in, the one where they'd killed Dracula. It had toys on the bed and books on the desk, and it looked lived-in, and it looked like it had once belonged to a child. Sypha knew whose room it must have been. Alucard most likely did have his own clothes there, but Sypha couldn't blame him for avoiding it.

"These will be fine," she said, making a mental note to tell Trevor to be more careful later. "And you said Isaac's clothes next door will fit Trevor?"

"Hopefully," Alucard replied, his voice a bit tentative. "And even if they don't fit well, they at least won't stink."

"It's not like any of us had much time for laundry when we were trying to save the entire human race," Trevor grumbled. "Anyway, this is a good tunic. I've had it for years, and it hasn't fallen apart yet."

"And how many times have you washed it over the years?" Sypha asked.

"I expect a number in the single digits," Alucard drawled.

"Fuck both of you. If you're both so obsessed with taking a bath and cleaning up, let's go do it already."

Sypha tucked her new clothes under her arm and took Alucard's hand, then she let him lead her and Trevor into the next room over. The clothes slipped slightly, almost falling to the floor, and wordlessly, Trevor took them in his free hand.

Alucard pulled out clothes for Trevor, and then he led them upstairs to a room that looked to be made almost entirely of marble. There was a huge depression in the floor, and what looked like some sort of metal pipe led up to it. Alucard bent down and twisted a gear, and water began to pour into the massive bath.

"What the fuck," Trevor said flatly.

"It's science, not magic," Alucard said preemptively. "But it does make life easier, and it'll make the water warm."

"It's warm?" Sypha repeated, bending down to feel the temperature of the water. It was indeed warm, the perfect temperature for bathing. "How is this possible?"

"Science," Alucard repeated. "My father's castle is full of science and technology that has been lost to time."

"And it can make warm water by itself?" Sypha asked.

"It comes from a system of pipes that run through the castle. There are multiple bathing rooms, but I believe this is the largest."

"It looks like a fucking pond," Trevor said. "You could practically swim in that."

"Yes," Alucard agreed wryly. "Although it was easier when I was smaller."

"You used to swim in here?" Sypha asked, looking at Alucard in delight.

"My mother used it to teach me how to swim," Alucard admitted. "She was insistent that I learn young."

"Do you have the same trouble vampires have with running water?" Trevor asked. "Do vampires actually have trouble with running water? I remember stories being mixed."

"I don't have any trouble with it. Do you?"

Trevor blinked. "Why would I?"

"Well, it might explain your lack of bathing."

Trevor gaped at Alucard, then he leaned down and splashed a wave of water at him. Sypha couldn't help but giggle at the look on Alucard's suddenly dripping face, like an offended cat.

"Are you actually a child?" Alucard asked incredulously. "Are you an overgrown child?"

"Just checking if you have problems with running water," Trevor replied in an innocent voice that convinced absolutely no one.

"Well, we're all about to get in the water anyway, so it's a moot point," Sypha said. She untied her belt and dropped it on the ground, then she started pulling off her robes.

"Whoa," Trevor said hurriedly. Sypha peeked out at him from under her robe. "Are you just-"

"I can't bathe with my clothes on," Sypha countered, tugging her robe all the way off. She was still wearing a shift underneath, but judging by the way Trevor and Alucard blushed, one would think she had stripped naked and was about to start dancing for them.

"We- We could-"

"We're taking a bath together, and that means we're all going to be naked," Sypha declared, tugging off her shift and stepping into the bath. "Now both of you, take your clothes off and get in."

Trevor and Alucard shared a look, then Trevor sighed and started pulling off his clothes. Sypha beamed at him, then turned her expectant look to Alucard.

"The bath might be crowded with three-"

"It's the size of a fucking pond, Alucard."

"Besides, you're already all wet," Sypha added. "Your wet clothes can't be comfortable. And you probably need to wash yourself too, because none of us have had a chance to have a nice bath recently. And with warm water!"

"If you don't get in the bath, Sypha will just make me drag you in," Trevor said as he kicked his clothes into a smelly pile on the floor. "So you might as well get in yourself and not have to deal with that."

"You needn't drag me in just because Sypha tells you too," Alucard tried.

"No, I do, because I don't want her mad at me. I don't know why you do want her mad at you, but that's stupid, and that's your problem."

"I don't want her mad at me, I just don't-"

"Trevor, drag him in."

"Alright, alright, fine," Alucard huffed. Sypha was glad he could eventually tell when he was beaten. As Trevor got into the bath, of course cursing as he went ("fuck me, the water really is warm"), Alucard slowly pulled off his shirt, and Sypha gasped.

"It looks worse than it is," Alucard assured her quickly.

"Good, cause it looks like you should be dead," Trevor said flatly.

"Is that all from... yesterday?" Sypha asked, trying to be a bit more delicate than simply asking if all the bruises that decorated what looked to be every inch of Alucard's torso had come from his father.

Trevor, unfortunately, missed the memo on subtlety, and he immediately demanded, "Wait, did Dracula do all that?"

Alucard flinched. "As I said, it looks worse than it is. I'll finish healing soon."

"Finish healing?" Sypha repeated. "So it was worse before?"

"None of us came out of yesterday's fight unscathed," Alucard snapped. Sypha blinked in surprise. She knew he could get short with people when he was feeling defensive, but as much as she'd seen it in his interactions with Trevor, Alucard hadn't snapped at her yet.

He seemed to regret it almost instantly; he deflated, and he wouldn't meet her eyes. "It's truly not as bad as it looks. I heal quickly. I'll be back to normal in a few days."

"Okay," Sypha said slowly. As much as she wanted to push, she had the feeling it would do more harm than good. "Well, a warm bath is always nice when you're sore, so take your pants off and get in here."

"I can still get out of the bath and drag you in," Trevor added.

"Don't trouble yourself," Alucard drawled. He slipped out of his pants to reveal more bruises, including a particularly spectacular one on his slightly swollen knee, and then he lowered himself into the bath.

"There we go," Sypha said with satisfaction. They had more to do, but this was a start.

And to be honest, even though she still didn't think she wanted to be rooted anywhere, and definitely not in Dracula's frankly unnerving old castle, the baths were very, very nice.

The warm water felt soothing against Alucard's sore muscles and battered body, and he could feel himself relaxing more and more the longer he was in it. He'd washed himself already, and Sypha had washed herself and bullied Trevor into washing himself, but none of them had moved to get out of the bath. Alucard couldn't speak for the others, but his reasons for not wanting to get out were twofold; it was warm and comfortable in the bath, and he was fairly certain his reprieve from Trevor and Sypha's questions would end when they got out of it.

"Sypha," Trevor said, nudging Sypha with his elbow as he leaned back against the edge of the bath. "It's cooling down again."

"We should get out of the bath eventually," Sypha said, but she didn't sound particularly convinced, and she used her magic to heat up the water again anyway. She'd done so multiple times already, which had kept the bath at a wonderfully warm temperature.

"Eh, eventually," Trevor replied, closing his eyes and leaning his head back.

"I hadn't expected you to be such a fan of baths, Belmont," Alucard remarked. "Given your general level of hygiene."

"If all baths were like this, I'd take them more often," Trevor countered. "This is nice."

"It is," Sypha agreed. She smiled over at Alucard. "I can't believe growing up with something like this. How could you ever bring yourself to take a bath in an inn when you'd been spoiled by baths like this?"

"I will admit, every other bath pales in comparison. Even the others in the castle, to be honest. None of them are as big."

"I mean, you don't need a bath this big for just one person," Trevor countered. "But it's nice for a group."

"It's perfect for a group," Sypha agreed. "For as long as we're here, we're going to take all our baths in here."

Alucard ducked his head slightly. He couldn't imagine that either Trevor or Sypha really wanted to stay in this decrepit, crumbling, deadly castle with him, but he couldn't bring himself to tell them to leave. He told himself it didn't matter what he said, that they'd make their own decisions, that he didn't know if they'd leave even if he told them to, but he knew that wasn't the real reason why he hadn't said anything about it. He didn't want to trap them, didn't want them to feel bound to the castle the way he was, but he also desperately didn't want them to leave him. He didn't want to be alone.

He had never been alone within the walls of the castle. He'd always had his parents with him, and he'd been secure in the knowledge of their love. Even when his mother was in Lupu or his father was traveling, he'd known where to find them, and he'd known that if he went to either of them, they'd welcome him with open arms.

He had no one left to welcome him home anymore.

"We should probably get out before too long, though," Sypha said. "Before Trevor falls asleep in the bath and drowns."

"One of you would rescue me," Trevor said, sounding confident and also as if he were about two minutes away from indeed falling asleep.

"I don't want to have to bother with it," Sypha replied. "Let's get out of the bath, deal with any wounds that need dealing with, and go to bed. Alucard, you said you thought there were beds big enough for three?"

"Are you certain you still want that?" Alucard asked tentatively. "We could share a room but not a bed, if that would be more comfortable. There may not be any rooms with more than one bed, but we could certainly drag in an extra mattress or put some pillows and blankets on the floor."

"No," Sypha said, shaking her head. "We're sharing a bed. Unless either of you really don't want to?"

Trevor shrugged. "As long as it's a bed, that's better than what I usually get. And I don't think either of you snore."

"I... doubt I will sleep soundly," Alucard said cautiously, trying to figure out the most delicate way to say "I'll likely wake you all through the night with my nightmares."

"I'm not sure any of us will, honestly," Sypha replied. "I think the only reason I didn't have nightmares last night was because I was too tired for them. I'm definitely expecting some tonight."

"I don't think I've ever slept soundly," Trevor agreed. "Don't worry about it."

"Then... I shall attempt to find a room for us," Alucard agreed. He moved to get out of the bath, but before he could get far, Sypha hurried to his side and grabbed his wrist in her hand.

"No going off alone. We'll all get dressed and go."

Alucard could have broken free from Sypha's grip in an instant. He didn't bother. "Didn't you say something about tending to wounds?"

"Yes, for all three of us," Sypha agreed. "And you're the one who's the son of a doctor. You've probably got more medical knowledge than either me or Trevor."

"The Speakers know a lot about medicine," Trevor called.

"Some Speakers, but it was never my speciality," Sypha replied. "I should probably learn now. It'll be good knowledge to have for the future."

Alucard's chest went cold, and he carefully disentangled his wrist from Sypha's grip. Medical knowledge could be helpful in many cases, of course, but the way Sypha said it didn't sound like she was interested in the abstract. He would have to be blind to miss how much Sypha had enjoyed traveling and fighting for the people of Wallachia, and her words sounded more like the words of someone who wanted to keep doing that than the words of someone who wanted to stay in an old castle forever. Alucard had no idea how long it would take before the castle was secure enough to be safe from prying eyes and thieving hands, or even if it could ever be left unattended. He knew, however, that he couldn't trap Sypha there forever, and he knew Trevor would follow wherever Sypha went, and that meant they would eventually leave him alone.

"You're welcome to any knowledge in the castle's libraries," he told Sypha, climbing out of the bath and reaching for a towel. "Some of my mother's notebooks are in Lupu, but-"

He cut himself off, his chest freezing even colder. His mother's notebooks had been in Lupu, but the church had burned her house before they burned her. He hadn't visited, but he knew there would be nothing left.

"Alucard," Sypha said quietly, desperately. He turned to see that she'd climbed out of the bath and was reaching for him, sympathy in her eyes. Behind her, Trevor had also gotten out of the bath and was watching them, a grim sort of determination on his face.

"We should find a bedroom," Alucard said, his voice dull and distant to his own ears. "Although- It is early yet. If you do not wish to sleep-"

"I don't think any of us slept very well last night," Sypha said gently. She was being so gentle with him, so careful, and he knew he should appreciate it, but it made him want to scream. To be fair, he didn't think it would take much to make him scream; he'd cried with Sypha before, but he'd done it quietly, and there was still something loud and pained and probably inhuman trapped in his chest, something that wanted to break its way out through his throat. He didn't know what noise he would make if he did let it out, but he was sure it would be unpleasant, and he didn't want to make Sypha and Trevor listen to it. He didn't want to make them deal with him at all, but he also couldn't bear the thought of them leaving.

He would have to bear it. They would leave eventually. No one stayed forever.

"Alucard?" Sypha asked, her tone clearly indicating that it wasn't the first time she'd said his name. "Let's get dressed and go to bed. I think we deserve to have a lazy day today."

"Very well." Alucard reached for the clothes he'd left next to the bath and pulled them on. His wet hair dripped onto his shirt, but he ignored it.

"Do you need me to help rewrap your bandages?" Trevor asked Sypha.

That was enough to get Alucard to turn and remember himself. "If you need help or any medical supplies, I am at your disposal."

"I should probably bandage my shoulder before I put a shirt on," Sypha said ruefully, looking at the cauterized claw marks on her shoulder. "Alucard, could you help? And I can help Trevor put new bandages on his hand."

Trevor looked down at his hand. "The bandage I have is fine, isn't it?"

"It's soaking wet," Alucard replied. "We can find a glove for you to put over the new bandages to keep them from getting wet or dirty."

"Why does the bandage getting wet matter?"

"How are you still alive?" Sypha demanded.

"Question for the ages," Trevor shot back.

"There should be medical supplies in my m-mother's laboratory," Alucard said, his voice tripping over the words slightly. "There may be ointments or salves to help against infection or promote healing as well."

"Are you sure?" Sypha asked. "We can go somewhere else if you would rather."

"My mother's laboratory will have the most supplies," Alucard said, his voice a bit firmer. If Sypha kept giving him other options, he would take one, and he knew the laboratory was the best. "We ought to go there."

"Alright," Sypha agreed. "Let's go, then."

She took Alucard's hand with enough tenderness to almost make him cry, and he led her and Trevor through the halls of the castle. The laboratory wasn't too far from the bathroom he'd chosen, but the most direct path went through a hallway that was half caved in, so he led them around in a different route. It led them close to his parents' bedroom, too close, but he held his breath and gripped his composure and managed to get them past.

The laboratory, when they reached it, was almost as bad as the bedroom would have been. There were little hints of his mother all over it, and smaller hints of his father as well; this had been his mother's laboratory, but his father had helped her in there too, teaching her the science that had been lost for generations. Alucard didn't let himself look too closely at anything except the medical supplies he knew they needed.

"Here," he said, picking up a small pot of salve. "This should help with your wounds, Sypha. It's for burns. And for Belmont…" He picked up another squat little pot. "This will help speed up your healing."

"Is there anything in here that might help your bruises?" Sypha asked.

Alucard couldn't bear the thought of using an ointment his mother had made to tend to the wounds he'd gotten while killing his father. "I don't need it. May I tend to your shoulder?"

Sypha studied him for a moment, then she nodded. Alucard picked up the jar of salve and dipped his fingers into it, spreading a thin layer over the burn.

"We'll have to keep an eye out for infection. Cauterization helps stop bleeding, but it can increase the chance of infections."

"I thought it made infection less likely," Sypha countered.

"Most people think so, yes, but my mother's research and my father's knowledge indicate the opposite. Regardless, the salve should help."

"Thank you," Sypha said gently as Alucard wiped the last of the salve off his fingers and reached for a roll of bandages. "And… your mother sounds like a remarkable woman."

Alucard felt like something was tightening around his throat. He couldn't force any words out as he started wrapping the bandages around Sypha's shoulders. She was equally quiet, and it wasn't until he tied the bandage off that she put a gentle hand on his arm. Even then, she didn't speak, just looked at him with enough pity in her eyes that it made his skin feel like it was burning.

"Belmont," he rasped, then he cleared his throat and corrected, "We should tend to Belmont's wounds."

"I've got the old bandages off," Trevor said, holding up a sodden heap of bandages. "Is there a special way I should put this stuff on?"

"Allow me," Alucard said, opening the pot of salve. It smelled sweet, like his mother's perfume, and he realized she must have added the scent into it, just to make it nicer.

He didn't realize he was crying until the tears dripped onto his hands. Quickly, he closed the pot again, not wanting to ruin it. He couldn't ruin one more of his parents' things, not now that he'd lost both of them.

"Alucard?" Sypha whispered.

His throat had gone tight again; it felt like it had when his father had grabbed him and squeezed. He heard a slight whine and realized after a moment that it came from him. He tried to stop, but he couldn't, and the sound only grew more frantic.

There was still a scream locked in his chest. He didn't know how much longer he'd be able to keep it in.

"Alucard?" Sypha repeated, and then, in a voice that was hardly more than a breath, "Adrian?"

He collapsed. It hurt his knee, he distantly realized, but the physical pain was nothing compared to how his chest ached. He tried to stop crying, tried to stop the high-pitched whine, tried to get a grip, but all he could do was gasp and sob and whine and hope he didn't scream.

He'd half expected Sypha to end up next to him on the ground, like before. He'd half expected both of them to leave. He hadn't really expected Trevor to kneel beside him, his face solemn.

"You're holding back. Trust me, I get it, but it doesn't help. Right now, you just need to let it out."

Words wouldn't come, but Alucard managed to shake his head. His tears were coming faster now, and he could feel the scream bubbling at the back of his throat, and he clenched his teeth to hold it in-

"Adrian," Trevor said, and Alucard couldn't help the pained gasp that escaped him. "Let it out."

Alucard - Adrian - bent over and screamed.

Trevor knew that Alucard wasn't human. He knew that Alucard - or Adrian, perhaps? He'd certainly reacted to hearing his birth name, but Trevor wasn't sure if it was positive or negative - was the son of Dracula, the son of a vampire, and his human mother's existence was enough to make him somewhat more human but wasn't enough to make him human entirely. Sometimes, Trevor almost forgot, and then Alucard would open his mouth in a way that showed off his fangs or move too quickly to be natural, and Trevor would remember what he was all over again.

And sometimes, he couldn't forget at all. Sometimes, Alucard's golden eyes would spark, or his claws would scratch, or his grip would be too tight - or he'd transform into a goddamn wolf - and Trevor would know what he was.

Alucard's scream hit a pitch that human vocal cords couldn't reach, and the whole room buzzed with it, and Trevor knew he wasn't human. He just didn't care.

Alucard screamed again, and Trevor grabbed him and tugged him into the tightest embrace he could manage. Alucard could have broken free in an instant, of course, and for a moment, there was a frenzied quality to his tension that made Trevor think maybe he would, but instead, Alucard went boneless against Trevor and wailed. It was the furthest thing from his near-silent sobbing before, and it sounded almost like it hurt, but in Trevor's experience, that was the type of crying that helped the most. Sometimes, you had to scream, and you had to let your grief be loud and ugly, and you had to break something - or even break yourself - just to prove that you were real. Trevor knew that grief well, and he knew that the only way out was through.

Sypha knelt next to them, her eyes wide and panicked. She'd never had to experience this sort of grief, Trevor didn't think; she'd told him before that her parents had both died when she was a baby, and she had no memories of them. There was a grief there, of course, but a less visceral one; she didn't know what she'd lost. It wasn't like Trevor and Alucard, who had had parents who loved them one day and then didn't the next.

For Trevor, at least, the moment when he stopped having parents who loved him was also the moment they died. For Alucard… Perhaps Trevor was diminishing his dynamic with his father by simplifying it so much, but to his eyes, it seemed as if Dracula's love for his son had died alongside his wife. Alucard had stopped having parents who loved him when his mother burned, and he'd killed his father a year later.

"Adrian?" Sypha asked quietly.

Alucard let out a whine that would have fit more with his wolf form than his human form, and his grip on Trevor tightened.

"Maybe we should stick to Alucard for now," Trevor said in an undertone. "We can talk about it later, but right now…"

"Alright," Sypha agreed. "But… Alucard, how can we help?"

Alucard let out a gasping little noise that started sounding almost like a laugh and swiftly turned into another wail. Between the tears and Alucard's still-wet hair, Trevor's shoulder was going to be soaked through, but he could handle that. He just hoped Alucard didn't grip his shirt so tightly he ripped it, which seemed like a very real possibility.

"There's nothing we can do right now," Trevor told Sypha. "We can just… be here, with him, and let him feel what he has to feel."

There was frustration on Sypha's face, and Trevor couldn't help a burst of affection towards her. Sypha was a problem-solver, a helper, a fixer; of course she wouldn't like being told there was nothing she could do. There wasn't anything else Trevor could say, though. He knew this grief, and he knew that Alucard just had to let it out. There was nothing either of them could do about it. Alucard would feel this pain, would fall to pieces, and they'd put him back together when it passed.

"You can hold him too," Trevor told Sypha quickly, before she could protest that she needed to do something. "On the other side. We can let go if he feels trapped, but…"

But sometimes Alucard seemed shockingly open with affection and physical touch, and Trevor had the feeling that Lisa Țepeș had hugged her son a great deal. Perhaps even Dracula had, before he lost his mind. Perhaps the pressure from both sides would make him panic, but Trevor thought it would help.

Sypha quickly plastered herself to Alucard's back, hugging him tightly, and a shudder ran through Alucard's body. It felt more like a good shudder than a bad one; he didn't try to pull away, and while his crying didn't lessen at all, it didn't seem to get any worse either.

"We've got you," Sypha told Alucard quietly. "We've got you. You're not alone. We're not going to leave you alone."

Alucard let out another animal noise of mourning, and Trevor held him close. It was strange; Alucard had always seemed so poised and put-together, but his wailing grief didn't seem as unlike him as Trevor would have expected. Sypha had said Alucard's sadness was like an icy well, and Trevor was pretty sure they were plumbing its depths. This grief had always been there, if hidden; now, they were letting it out.

Trevor didn't know how long it had been when Alucard finally started to quiet, he just knew that his knees had grown sore and the shoulder of his shirt had indeed been soaked. He wondered how Alucard's knee was; it had been swollen enough before he'd knelt on it for however long. Trevor was sure it would be the least of Alucard's concerns - he knew well how physical complaints seemed secondary to the sort of stabbing pain that grief caused - but he made a note to tend to it himself. Alucard wasn't in any place to take care of himself, so Trevor and Sypha would have to do it for him.

"I'm sorry," Alucard finally rasped, after his tears stopped. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"You don't need to apologize," Trevor told him gruffly. "My family's dead too, remember? I get it."

Alucard flinched in his embrace, then he carefully disentangled himself. Sypha clung to him for a moment longer, but she did let him go when it seemed clear he wanted some space. With every bit of distance, Trevor could see Alucard try to put his usual mask back in place, but it didn't quite work. The mask had cracked, and Trevor and Sypha had seen behind it, and Alucard's hasty attempt to put it back together wasn't good enough to fool them anymore.

"Your hand," Alucard said, looking at Trevor. "We didn't- The salve- I can-"

"We don't have to," Trevor said. "I'll heal without it."

"I can apply it," Alucard insisted.

"Maybe, but you don't have to." Trevor eyed him. "What did it remind you of?"

Because that breakdown had been the result of a memory, Trevor knew it. He knew how these things went, and those sorts of breakdowns were the ones he had not long after his family died, when every little thing reminded him of them. He'd see a girl who looked a bit like one of his sisters, or he'd see a man who was as tall as his father, or he'd see a woman kiss her child on the cheek like his mother always did, and he'd lose himself in the screaming guilt that built up in his chest. He knew how it felt, and he knew something about the salve had reminded Alucard of his mother, even more than everything else in her laboratory.

Alucard swallowed hard. "It smells like her perfume."

Scents were, Trevor had found, horribly effective at bringing back memories; he didn't blame Alucard at all. It also meant that he absolutely wasn't going to use the salve, because he wasn't about to go around smelling like Alucard's mother and forcing that memory.

"I don't need it," he said again. "But you can bandage my hand again, if you want."

He'd thought that it would make Alucard feel better if he had something to do, and if the franticness with which Alucard seized upon the job meant anything, he'd been right. Trevor didn't think his wounds had ever been bandaged with such single-minded intensity before.

"Should we find a bedroom?" Sypha asked quietly, while Alucard tied the bandage off. "I think we're all exhausted."

"If you wish," Alucard replied, trying to stand and hissing as he tried to unbend his bad knee. Trevor stood quickly and held out a hand, and Sypha went to Alucard's other side and tucked herself under his shoulder.

"I can walk," Alucard told her, somewhat bemused.

"Maybe you can, but we can help."

"I'm not-" Alucard pressed his lips together. "I recognize that my… display may make this hard to believe, but I am not quite so fragile as you two seem to think."

"We don't think you're fragile," Trevor retorted. "We think you're hurting, and we want to help. It's what happens when you have friends, asshole."

"I don't think friends usually refer to other friends as an asshole," Sypha remarked.

Trevor snorted. "You don't have the right type of friends, then."

"Or maybe I do, and you don't."

"Or maybe you're both absurd," Alucard said, "and we ought to go find a bedroom, if you two are still set on it."

"We are," Sypha declared. She tightened her grip on Alucard and started tugging them towards the door. "Let's go."

"Give us a moment to get our feet under us, woman," Trevor grumbled. Sypha rolled her eyes dramatically, but she did slow down. Trevor had a feeling it was more for Alucard's sake than his own, honestly, given how tentatively Alucard put weight on his bad knee, but Trevor couldn't blame her for wanting to take care of him, and he still benefitted from it, so he didn't complain.

Alucard led them down hallways and up stairs until they finally reached a wing that looked like it had been left more or less untouched. "These are some of the guest chambers," Alucard said. "The beds should be large, and I thought they were far enough from the fighting that they weren't likely to have been destroyed. It's... possible that some of them were occupied before the fighting, but I'm certain we can find one that suits our needs."

"Let's check," Sypha said, pulling them over to the closest door.

It did look like it had been occupied; there was a dress draped over a chair and the sheets were rumpled. Trevor frowned.

"Do vampires sleep much?"

"They can still use beds, Belmont," Alucard said wryly.

"Okay, we are not staying in a room where there was vampire sex," Trevor declared. "No way. We're finding another one."

"Okay," Sypha agreed with a giggle, leading them back out into the hallway.

The next three rooms had also all been occupied, but the fifth one they checked looked untouched. "It doesn't smell like anyone was staying in here," Alucard reported. "And there's nothing in here that doesn't belong in the castle."

"Then it's good enough," Trevor said. He went over to the bed and collapsed face-first onto it, relishing how soft it was. It had been years since he'd slept in a proper bed like this one; he intended to enjoy every moment of it.

"You're taking up more than your fair share of the space," Sypha said. Trevor could feel the mattress shift as she sat down on it, and then she shoved him hard enough he thought for a moment he would fall off.

"Oi!"

"Don't take up more than your fair share, then!"

"You two are absurd," Alucard said, almost sounding as if it were a revelation.

"If you're just picking up on that now, you're an idiot."

"Trevor!"

"Oh, trust me, I've known for quite a while. But occasionally, it surprises me all over again."

"Sounds like a you problem."

"I think we're all absurd," Sypha declared. "And I think you should lie down, Alucard, you look exhausted."

Alucard hesitated. One of his hands went up to his hair, which Trevor noticed seemed a bit tangled.

"I'll braid it for you," he offered unthinkingly.

"You know how to braid?" Alucard asked.

Trevor had had many sisters; he knew how to braid with his eyes shut. "I'm not a complete idiot. Sit down."

Alucard crossed slowly towards the bed. "We don't have a comb."

"Is there one I can find somewhere?" Sypha asked.

"I… I'm not sure where the closest one would be," Alucard said, in a voice that made Trevor think he knew exactly where to find one but couldn't stomach the thought of it. His mother must have had combs in the castle, after all.

"I'll use my fingers, then," Trevor said. "Unless Sypha can magic me up an ice comb."

"I don't think it would work too well," Sypha said.

"Fingers it is." Carefully, starting at the bottom, Trevor ran his fingers through Alucard's hair, teasing apart the burgeoning tangles. And slowly, slowly, Alucard began to relax.

Trevor congratulated himself on a job well done, and he settled in to finish it.

Sometimes, Alucard reminded Sypha of a big cat. His eyes could glint like one in the light, and the way he hissed sometimes made her think of how a cat would when its hair stood on end. And then, when Trevor had splashed him earlier, he'd looked just like a cat, and Sypha had almost been able to imagine his tail puffing up with indignation.

When Trevor brushed his hair, Alucard reminded her of a cat too, but in a different way. The way he relaxed, the way he began to melt, was like a cat who was being petted and was about to purr. For a moment, Sypha wondered if Alucard would start purring, but even though he could make some noises that didn't sound quite human, purring didn't seem to be one of them.

Trevor started humming absently as he continued running his fingers through Alucard's hair. Sypha was fairly certain it was brushed enough, but Trevor didn't stop combing it, and Alucard just kept melting into the touch. Finally, Trevor began separating the hair into three sections, and he braided it into a thick golden rope. Sypha handed him a scrap of ribbon when he reached the bottom, and he tied it off expertly.

"There," Trevor said, his voice coming out gentler than he'd probably meant it to. "How are my braiding skills?"

Alucard ran his fingers down the braid, looking like he was dreaming. "Thank you."

Trevor looked at him for a long moment, and Sypha held her breath, wondering what he would do. She had a feeling, but she wasn't sure…

But her feeling was right, because Trevor just let out a long breath, then he leaned forward to press a kiss to Alucard's lips.

Alucard gasped at the kiss, but he seemed to like it, given the way he leaned into Trevor, chasing his mouth when Trevor seemed like he might pull away. Sypha watched them with satisfaction. She'd had the feeling they were all heading towards this, but she hadn't been sure if the boys would go for it; she was glad to see that they would.

When they finally pulled apart, Alucard and Trevor stared at each other for a long moment. Sypha leaned forward slightly, waiting to see what they'd do next. Her movement seemed to remind them that she was there, as both turned to her at the same moment.

"Oh, don't let me interrupt," she said. "Or do, it's up to you."

"Sypha," Alucard breathed, her name almost sounding like a prayer on his lips. "And Belmont- Trevor. Do you…" Something went almost guarded in his eyes. "What do you want?"

"What does it look like?" Trevor retorted. "Do you think I just go around kissing everyone?"

"Do you truly want me?" Alucard asked. "Or do you…"

"You're really going to make me spell this out?" Trevor demanded. "I want you, you stupid fuck. And Sypha too, if she'll have me."

"Oh, I intend to," Sypha replied, relishing how the words made a slight flush color Trevor's cheeks. "And you too, Alucard, if you want that."

"If I…" Alucard looked at the two of them with a helpless expression on his face. "I have wanted you since I first saw you. I never thought it would even be a possibility."

"Well, you sad vampire bastard, it's your lucky day," Trevor replied.

Alucard stared at him for a moment, then he kissed Trevor so hard it was almost more of a tackle than a kiss. Trevor didn't seem to mind; he let Alucard pin him to the bed without a fight. Sypha swore he seemed to be going boneless. She made a mental note of that, then she crawled over to the other two and pressed a kiss to the side of Alucard's neck.

"Oh!" Alucard gasped, the sound half swallowed up by Trevor. Sypha started to pull away, but Alucard reached blindly for her hand and squeezed it, and she took that as a sign to continue. She peppered kisses along the side of his neck as he continued kissing Trevor, and when they finally split apart for air, Alucard hardly hesitated before turning and kissing Sypha instead.

Alucard could be reserved in many things, sometimes enough to be cold. He wasn't when it came to kissing. His mouth was hot and passionate, and he kissed Sypha like he wanted to devour her. Maybe he did; Sypha didn't know enough about his vampire instincts to be sure. If he did, she thought she wanted to be devoured. She understood why Trevor had just laid back and let Alucard do what he wanted, and although she wasn't going to be quite that submissive, she didn't push back too much either. She just let Alucard keep kissing her until she finally had to break away to breathe.

"That was hot," Trevor said from the bed below them.

"I want a turn with you," Sypha said, and she leaned over Trevor and kissed him hard. He gave into her as much as he'd given into Alucard, letting her do what she wanted, and the power of it thrilled her. He would just lie there and trust her, and she would do whatever would be best for him. She had a feeling she could figure it out fairly easily.

"You are beautiful," Alucard whispered, kissing Sypha's neck and then Trevor's. "You are both so beautiful."

"Are you sure-" Trevor let out a moan as Alucard kept trailing kisses down his neck, then visibly shook himself and said, "Are you sure you want this?"

Alucard stopped, looking up at him with golden eyes blown wide. "Am I sure?"

"I know grief does funny things to your head," Trevor said, squirming slightly. Sypha wondered if he was uncomfortable with the topic or if he was a bit too comfortable with the way Alucard was straddling him. "And I know you don't want to be alone. But if you don't want this, we'll still stay."

"We will," Sypha agreed. "However you want us, we will stay until you tell us to go."

"I want both of you," Alucard said firmly. "I want you both so much that I can hardly think. I have wanted you since Gresit. But…"

"But?" Trevor repeated.

"I… I do not want our first time to be poisoned by grief," Alucard said slowly. "If you two want- I will of course not stop you, but I-"

"Honestly, I think I'm too tired for sex anyway," Sypha stated baldly.

"What she said," Trevor agreed. "The kissing is great, but I am really fucking tired. And this bed is really comfortable."

"A comfortable bed is also nice for sex," Sypha allowed. "But I just want to sleep in it for now. We can have sex in it later."

"You're certain?" Alucard asked hesitantly.

"Entirely," Sypha said. "That said, maybe we can do a few more kisses before we go to sleep?"

Alucard swooped in and kissed her hard enough that she almost fell backwards. Trevor groaned beneath her when she shifted against him, and a moment later, she felt his hands on her hips to steady her. She kissed Alucard back, pushing back a bit against him, and she was surprised but pleased to find that Alucard yielded against her almost immediately. If she wanted a fight, she was certain he would give her one, but if she wanted to be in charge, he seemed to have no problems with that.

Sypha would keep that in mind for the future.

When she finally had to pull away from Alucard, she looked over at Trevor, who was blinking up at them like they were a miracle, and said, "You should kiss him."

She wasn't entirely certain if the command had been for Trevor or Alucard, even as she spoke it, but both of them took her up on it, and a moment later, they were kissing, Alucard pressing Trevor into the mattress once more. Trevor, Sypha thought, wouldn't push back. Trevor would lie down and let them do what they wished.

She kept that in mind for the future too.

When Trevor and Alucard finally split, Sypha leaned down and kissed Trevor herself, a much gentler kiss than before. When she pulled away, she lay down beside him, and then she grabbed Alucard and tugged him into the pile.

"Maybe we should have taken a smaller bed."

"Smaller?" Alucard repeated as he settled in on Sypha's other side. "Anything smaller and we wouldn't fit."

"Anything smaller and we'd have to cuddle even more," Sypha corrected. "You both should know, I expect you to still be here and to be snuggling with me when I wake up. No exceptions."

"What if I have to piss?" Trevor asked.

"Motion to push Trevor out of bed?" Alucard suggested.

"What? It was a valid question!"

"No pushing Trevor out of bed," Sypha declared. "And you're allowed to leave to piss, but only if you come right back."

"I'm not going anywhere," Trevor promised.

"None of us are," Alucard agreed from behind Sypha.

"Good," Sypha declared. "Then it's time to sleep."

"She's rather bossy, isn't she?" Alucard asked Trevor, picking up his head slightly to look over Sypha at him.

"Yeah, but we knew that going in," Trevor dismissed.

"She is also right here," Sypha declared loudly. "And I only boss you around because neither of you know what you're doing. You're both stupid."

"Excuse me?" Alucard demanded, at the same time that Trevor shrugged and admitted, "Yeah, you're probably right."

"You both need someone to take command," Sypha said. "And I'm good at that, so I can do it. We make a good team that way!"

"And Alucard," Trevor added, "your complaining would make more sense if you hadn't let Sypha push you around the second she tried."

"It's called being a gentleman, Belmont. Something you may not know anything about."

"The Belmont family was landed gentry, you know. Real gentry, not weird vampire gentry."

"I'll have you know, my family was closer to vampire royalty than vampire gentry," Alucard replied in his prissiest voice.

"Yes, and Speakers don't have those silly hierarchies, so I am not gentry or royalty, and yet I still have better manners than both of you," Sypha cut in. "And I am also tired, so both of you, be quiet so I can go to sleep."

"So bossy," Trevor muttered.

"Sleep."

Trevor grumbled slightly, but he went quiet and curled towards Sypha on the bed. On her other side, Alucard seemed a bit hesitant to get too close until she reached over and grabbed him, and then he plastered himself to her side without further ado.

"And remember," Sypha added, "no running away in the night. I'm talking to you, Alucard."

"No running away," Alucard promised.

"We'll track you down if you try," Trevor added. "And I'll make sure you regret it."

"And how do you intend to do that?" Alucard countered. "It's not as if you could beat me in a fight."

"Oi, who had a knife in whose guts?"

"Boys!"

"He started it," Alucard said quickly.

"Are you a fucking child? Also, fuck you, I didn't."

"I'm going to kill both of you," Sypha groaned, "and it'll be unfortunate because I won't have even had a chance to have sex with you yet."

"I'd help you kill Belmont."

"Fuck you, Alucard."

"You are both driving me crazy. Be quiet and go to sleep. Now."

There were a few grumbles from both boys this time, but they quieted and settled, and Sypha closed her eyes. She could feel Alucard against one side and Trevor against the other, and the configuration felt profoundly right. She opened her mouth to tell them she loved them, then she reconsidered and closed it. She didn't want to open up the idea of conversation again, not when the boys had just stopped talking. She knew them, and she knew the chances of it starting another argument.

She would tell them when they woke up.

Ever since Alucard was a child, his circadian rhythm had been… irregular. It came, he knew, of being half human and half vampire, with their opposite rhythms, and it wasn't helped by the fact that he went back and forth between vampire and human society, meaning he had to switch rhythms himself. His year of sleep in Gresit hadn't helped either, to be honest. The end result was that sometimes, Alucard was exhausted when he was meant to be awake, and sometimes, he was wakeful when he was meant to be asleep.

Next to him, Sypha was sleeping. So was Trevor, on her other side. And yet Alucard, despite his own exhaustion, couldn't join them. His mind refused to be quiet, and his body was wired. If he hadn't promised Sypha not to go anywhere, he would have left the bed, but he couldn't let her wake up without him, and even if he could leave, he had nowhere to go.

All he had left were Trevor and Sypha. The idea was marginally less terrifying now than it had been before their confessions, but it still made his heart clench in his chest. They were all he had left, and if he lost them, he would have nothing.

He wondered briefly how things would have gone if they'd left him alone, like he'd originally thought they would. They never would have shared this time together, so he imagined Trevor and Sypha would have confessed their feelings and left him out of it entirely. Alucard would have stayed in the castle, and he would have wasted away until there was nothing left of him. He would have withered until he died.

If Trevor and Sypha left him now, if they changed their minds, he wouldn't survive it even long enough to wither.

Sypha let out a quiet sound next to him and rolled over, draping one arm over Alucard's waist. It pressed against some of his many bruises, but he didn't mind. The kissing before had been equally painful in that way, but he would endure any amount of pain for even a single kiss from Trevor and Sypha. Having them next to him, even if it hurt a little, reminded him that he was there, that they were there, that they were alive.

He liked to think that, if she could have seen them, his mother would have liked Trevor and Sypha.

She wouldn't have liked that they killed her husband, of course, but Alucard told himself that his mother would have understood, and she wouldn't have blamed him for what he had to do. She loved humans, and if Dracula was a threat to them, she would stop him too. Alucard had to believe that. He couldn't bear the idea that his mother would have been disappointed in him.

He sighed, staring up at the ceiling, and then looked over to see that Trevor's eyes were open and focused on him. "Did I wake you?" he breathed, although he couldn't really see how he could have.

"Nah," Trevor replied, his whisper louder than Alucard's. "And don't worry about Sypha, nothing can wake her up when she's asleep."

"I imagine Speaker caravans are not particularly quiet," Alucard replied, his voice a little louder.

"Don't think so," Trevor agreed. "Why aren't you sleeping?"

"Why aren't you?" Alucard retorted.

"Because I woke up and you were sighing and staring pathetically at the ceiling like a tortured maiden, and for some stupid reason, Sypha and I decided that sort of thing should be our problem."

It was just more of their usual banter, and Alucard knew Trevor didn't mean it any more than he had meant his earlier comments about kicking Trevor out of bed, but something about it still rubbed Alucard the wrong way. "No one forced you," he snapped, his voice too loud. He forced himself to quiet down as he added, "I will not keep you here if you wish to go."

He didn't quite know what he would do if Trevor took him up on the offer, but he would not keep Trevor or Sypha trapped. He promised himself that.

Trevor looked surprised for a moment, then his expression resolved into something almost knowing. Alucard, who wasn't sure he knew what he was feeling himself, felt a flash of annoyance. How dare Trevor think he knew what Alucard was thinking? How dare he think he knew him so well-

"You're worried about us leaving and testing lines, aren't you?"

Alucard blinked, and the flash of annoyance was replaced by a flush of shame as he realized that was exactly what he had been doing. He hadn't been doing it consciously, if that made it any better, but he had been worried about Trevor and Sypha leaving, and he had been purposefully pushing to see if it would be enough to make them go. He didn't want them to go, he never wanted them to go, but…

But they would probably go eventually, and maybe it would hurt less if he saw it coming.

"Trust me," Trevor added, "I'm an expert at pushing people away. You could probably get pretty good at it if you tried, but it doesn't make anything better. It just leaves you alone."

"I don't want to be alone," Alucard whispered.

"At least you can admit that," Trevor said. "I thought I did want to be alone for a long time. By the time I realized I didn't, I'd gotten so good at being an asshole that I wasn't sure I'd ever find anyone who would want to stick around."

"I do," Alucard said, reaching for Trevor. "I- I want to keep you and Sypha forever. I do not want to be alone. But I-"

"You're afraid we'll leave," Trevor said. "Trusting people is shit."

"I trust you," Alucard said quickly. "I do, but- But you should not have to stay in this castle, and you will realize that you don't want to, and you will be right to leave, but-"

"We'll bring you with us," Trevor said. "You think we're leaving you here? Once we get up and eat and start feeling less like absolute shit, we're going to find a way to seal up the castle and the Hold, and all three of us are getting the hell away from here. We can come back if we need information or a place to stay, but we're not sticking around forever. That includes you."

"Someone needs to protect this place."

"We'll set up wards to protect it. You don't have to stay here."

"It is all I have left of them," Alucard whispered.

He'd fought his father in these halls. He'd also played with him. In the same bedroom where he'd shoved a stake through his father's heart, his father used to tuck him in at night.

"We painted this room. We... made these toys."

There was nothing left of his mother's home in Lupu, but his mother had lived here too. Her laboratory still held medicines she'd made, medicines that smelled like her. If he dared to go into his parents' bedroom, he would find her clothes. Perhaps he would find her perfume.

Perhaps he would still be able to smell her, if he tried hard enough.

"Do you want to stay?" Trevor asked. "With us?"

If Alucard stayed in the castle, even if he stayed with Trevor and Sypha, he thought he would lose his mind. If he left it, he might lose it too.

"I don't know."

"Well, we'll have to stay for a while anyway, until we figure out how to protect it," Trevor said. "You can think about it. And if you don't want to leave, then we don't. We can still put up wards and shit to keep it safe if we leave for shorter trips, but we can stick around."

"You cannot mean to do that," Alucard said, shaking his head. "You have other places to go. Better places to go."

"Sypha's home is the road, with her caravan," Trevor said. "I doubt she could stay in one place forever, but she could base here, I'm sure of it. And the last home I had was the burnt wreck outside, so I don't have anywhere else."

"That doesn't mean- This is no fit place to live. Even if we were able to repair the castle and clean it, it's still-"

"It's your home," Trevor said. "And we want to be with you. It doesn't matter where, as long as we're together."

"You're ridiculous," Alucard said, his voice trembling. "You can't- You won't want to stay. You'll leave eventually. You'll leave me, and-"

And I'll be alone, because there is no one left in the world to care for me.

Trevor looked at Alucard for a moment, then he nudged Sypha. "Hey, wake up."

"No, Trevor, don't-"

"Alucard is working himself up over nothing," Trevor told Sypha, nudging her again, "and he needs us to make him calm down."

"I am not working myself up over nothing-"

"You are. Sypha, wake up."

Sypha finally blinked blearily, looking over at Trevor. "I was sleeping."

"Alucard is freaking out."

Sypha looked over at Alucard, and sympathy passed over her expression. "Oh, Alucard."

"I'm fine," Alucard said quickly. "Go back to sleep."

"He thinks we're going to leave him," Trevor told Sypha. "He thinks we won't want to stay in the castle with him."

"Why would he think that?" Sypha demanded. "What did you say to him?"

"Hey, I told him we would stay! He's the one who started working himself up about it."

Sypha looked over at Alucard. "He's right, you know. We want to stay with you."

"You're a Speaker," Alucard said. "You're supposed to travel. And Trevor- You cannot want to live your life in Dracula's castle. You both want to explore, and to go to other places, and I cannot blame you. I cannot keep you here."

"I tried to tell him we care more about him than wandering around, but he doesn't believe me," Trevor told Sypha. "Your turn."

"Of course we care more about him than wandering," Sypha said, sounding almost offended. "Alucard, of course we care more about you! The world- I would like to see more of it, yes, but I've seen a lot, and even if I do go out to see other places, I will always come back. And you can come with me, if you want."

"I don't-" Alucard clenched his fists around the bedsheets. He still didn't know if he wanted to stay or leave, he didn't know-

"We decided we'd give it some time before Alucard decides if he wants to stay in the castle or not," Trevor said. "And for your information, Alucard, I wouldn't want to live my life in Dracula's castle, but I'm fine living my life in ours."

"You are more than I deserve," Alucard whispered, looking from Trevor to Sypha. "You are- I cannot-"

"Oh," Sypha said quietly, "you don't mean that to say you're grateful, you mean that to say you're scared."

"You are more than I deserve," Alucard repeated. "And so I cannot keep you."

"We're not something you deserve," Sypha told him firmly. "No one deserves anyone else. We're all our own people, and we make our own decisions, and Trevor and I chose you. Do you understand that, Alucard? We chose you. Stop devaluing our decisions by pretending that something else gave us to you as something you do or don't deserve."

Alucard swallowed hard. "I- I don't know-"

"None of us have any idea what we're doing," Trevor said. "Except maybe Sypha, but still not entirely. We're all flying blind, and we just need to do our best. So calm down, get some sleep, and we'll all do our best together."

Sypha wriggled around a bit, then she rolled over Alucard and cuddled up against him from behind. "I think you need to be in the middle more than I do."

"I-"

"Just go to sleep," Trevor urged him, his voice low and soothing. "You're tired, and you're grieving, and everything will look better after you get some rest."

"It won't."

"It will. Now, are you going to fall asleep, or do I have to sing a lullaby?"

"I want you to sing a lullaby," Sypha said.

"I didn't ask you."

"Oh, so you only sing lullabies for Alucard?"

"Right now, I'm only asking Alucard."

"Alucard, say yes, I want to hear Trevor sing a lullaby."

"I am no longer asking Alucard."

Alucard looked at Trevor and Sypha helplessly. "I don't know how to trust this."

"Do you trust us?" Trevor asked.

"I do."

"Then trust that we mean it when we say that we'll stay."

Alucard wished he could.

"We'll work on it," Sypha said, resting her head on Alucard's shoulder. "For now, you need to sleep. Go to sleep. Trevor, sing him a lullaby."

"No, I'm not doing that anymore."

"Then just go to sleep, Alucard. We'll get Trevor to sing you a lullaby some other time."

Alucard looked at Sypha, then at Trevor, and then he tentatively let himself relax between them. They both curled around him as he closed his eyes, and it felt good and warm and loving. He wished they would stay.

Maybe, if he tried hard enough, he could even make himself believe it.