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The alarm clock wasn’t what woke Max up this particular morning, she’d beaten it by what she assumed was at least a half hour, if the warmth on her face peeking in through the curtains and the telltale sounds of the early morning birdsong were any indication.
She’d admit the first time she’d heard the sound of a Kookaburra, it had made her double take in the direction with concern.
It sounded like an evil maniacal laugh in avian form!
She turned slightly to the left, hearing the ever so slight sound of Jane’s breathing as she was still asleep, and thankfully so after last night. It had been another ‘bad’ night, sleep that had been wracked with nightmares had caused Jane to not get a full night’s rest and had led to a lot of expressions of comfort on Max’s end.
Not that she minded, she was always there for her.
But it did make today all the more hard for her, knowing she was going to be heading out and not even having a proper night’s sleep to aid her.
Bringing a hand up, she wiped away the remnants of sleep and mental cobwebs from her mind as she gently eased the blankets off her side, careful not to disrupt Jane as she reached down and adjusted her legs.
Thankful that she still had some feeling in her legs despite having lost the use of them, she did a quick series of rubs and massages across her calves before reaching for her chair beside the bed, again being careful not to wake Jane, she maneuvered herself from the mattress and readjusted the blankets from her chair before unlocking the brakes and pushing herself around the bed.
She’d been a little concerned at first when she’d discovered what was to be her new home, a multi level cabin. Instantly thoughts of being stuck on the ground floor had come to mind, before she’d been shown the ramps and accessibility features Jane had installed for her before she’d brought her here.
She may have gotten a little teary eyed.
Or more than a little, but it had struck her once again how much Jane cared for her.
And the mental image of her struggling to build said ramps had been amusing, but she appreciated the effort and time her girlfriend had put into making this a home for both of them.
Wheeling herself downstairs, Max made a beeline for the kitchen. She may not have been able to make up for the lost hours of sleep Jane had missed, but she could at least make sure she wouldn’t be heading off without eating properly.
And no, waffles were not on the menu.
She still couldn’t hold back a snort of laughter as she remembered finding out Australian stores didn’t stock Eggos, especially all the way out here.
Making Jane’s favorite snack a highly rare treat and commodity.
Pulling up just where she knew the fridge to be located, Max’s hand slid down the handle before pulling it open, quickly roaming around the interior as she collected the various ingredients on her lap and placed others on the countertop near the stove.
Shutting the fridge, Max made sure to check the ingredients once more, opening the cartoon of eggs and running her fingers along the inside.
She’d have to make another grocery trip before Jane got back.
Turning herself around and moving over to where the bowls were kept, she got to work.
The sound of Jane’s upstairs awakening had met Max’s ears while she’d been cooking, not letting it slow her progress; however, she continued as Jane had been showering, finishing plating up and putting all the food on the dining table just as Jane had entered the room.
The scent of damp body wash scented skin and hair mingled with the various items of food as Jane approached.
“Max, you didn’t need to do this.” Jane said softly.
As if she hadn’t done it many times before.
“Hey, you need a good meal, especially after last night. And besides, who says it’s all for you?” Max replied lightly as she took her place at the table. “I’m hungry too, you know.”
“Thank you. I appreciate it.” Jane said as she took a seat, the sound of shuffling chair legs filling the room before Jane began pouring them both some juice.
Max meanwhile had already begun eating, her mouth having been salivating half way through her cooking on the stove. But in the end, she’d prepared a mini feast that would fill them both up for the day, more so she hoped in Jane’s case.
An assortment of scrambled eggs, pan fried mushrooms, spinach and tomatoes, bacon, and toast.
As well as a small serving of oatmeal in a separate bowl.
“Mmm, extra crispy just right.” Max said in between bites of a piece of bacon, trying to distract herself from what she knew was coming.
What they both knew was coming.
“...I’ll be heading out in an hour.” Jane said quietly, instantly cutting through the small talk based series of shields Max had planned to erect to distract herself from the inevitable.
Her eyes shifted slightly, she knew she was now peering down at the table, not that it mattered, as she continued to silently chew her bacon, a short nod was all she could do or muster in terms of a reply.
They both knew this was coming today, Max had been told almost two weeks ago that Jane was going to be heading out again. But it still did little to ease the fact she was going to be putting herself in danger.
However necessary it was, however many lives it saved and dangers it prevented.
It didn’t change the fact Max was going to be staying here when Jane was going.
Didn’t change the fact she couldn’t be of more use.
At least not here, not like this…
“I will keep in communication with you within-”
“Within the scheduled time frames, yeah I know.” Max said quickly, unable to hide her displeasure as she shoveled a fork full of scrambled eggs into her mouth in an attempt to move the conversation along.
She could practically feel the reaction, physically and emotionally from Jane, causing her to sigh and put her fork down.
"...You are unhappy." Jane's voice replied quietly and Max heard the ever so slight fumbling with the cutlery in Jane's hands.
“...I’m sorry, it’s just…” she began, her fingers on her left hand scraping along the arm rest of her chair.
“I’m still not ok with you-I mean, I’m still not comfortable…” Max tried before she shut her eyes and let out a shaky breath.
“....I just wish I was out there with you.”
And it was true, Max wished she was out there in the thick of it with Jane, there by her side and watching her back.
But it wasn’t to be.
What little help she could provide was stationary and minimal.
“I don’t…” Jane’s reply cut through her thoughts, causing Max to lean back in her chair and turn towards her.
She knew what Jane meant, and while a small part of her internally did get angry, it quickly passed.
They’d had that argument before, and Max didn’t want to have it again, even if she could muster up the emotional strength to do so right now, it wouldn’t be for the best for either of them.
And she wouldn’t have been able to forgive herself if there last hour before Jane left was filled with arguing, especially if she didn’t-
No!
She would come back.
Max quickly banished any thoughts to the contrary. She would come back, and that was the end of it.
…She needed her to come back.
Reaching across the table, Max’s hand was met with Jane’s as her fingers curled around Max’s palm.
Max squeezed her hand lightly, her thumb tracing along Jane’s fingers before she moved their hands closer, pressing a gentle kiss atop her knuckles.
“Just promise me, you’ll call.”
Jane brought her other hand up, using both to clasp at Max’s as she gave her a reassuring squeeze.
“I promise.”
Max waited by the open door as Jane walked down the ramp from upstairs, soft footsteps replaced by the harsher sound of boots on the floorboards as she approached.
If all went well, and it would, then Jane would be back this time next week.
Jane’s hands came to rest on her shoulders as she leant down to Max’s level. Max couldn’t help but reach out, brushing her hand along the soft skin of Jane’s cheek, curling a stray hair back behind her ear.
There was so much she wanted to say, it was always like this, so many thoughts filled her head at once and the ever marching seconds of time kept passing that she knew would only lead to Jane’s departure.
“Can I kiss you.”
The sudden request didn’t fail to bring a humorous breath from Max’s throat, but it quelled as she couldn’t suppress the smile that grew on her face.
Even after all this time, Jane still would occasionally ask if it was ok to kiss her. It was cute and adorable in equal measure, to which she nodded in acquiescence.
The sensation of feeling Jane’s face was quickly overwhelmed, washed away as her senses were bombarded on multiple fronts. The soft feeling of her lips meeting Max’s, her natural scent mixed with body wash and shampoo, Max’s own heartbeat sped up just right as her tongue darted out ever so slightly to brush against Jane’s teeth and pick up the still present addition of toothpaste.
Heavy breaths exchanged between them when they finally broke apart, Max’s mouth remained open momentarily as she thought of just what to say.
What was there to say that hadn’t been said before.
Her mind always seemed to come up with things later on that she would criticize herself for not saying at the time. But here they were yet again, and she couldn’t think of anything to say other than what seemed important.
“Please…”
‘Please don’t go.’
‘Please take me with you.’
‘Please don’t get yourself killed.’
‘Please don’t leave me alone.’
“Please, just come back safe.” was what came out in the end, she heard the sound of Jane’s boots creaking as she stood up, a hand squeezed Max’s shoulder before Jane leaned closer.
“I promise I will come back.” she said, so firmly and assuredly that Max had no choice but to believe it, and the kiss on the cheek that accompanied it also helped assuage her worries.
“...I love you, Jane Hopper.”
And again, without seeing it, she knew Jane’s expression, this time one of warmth, love and reciprocated emotions.
“And I love you, Max Mayfield.” she uttered as she hugged Max, quickly the action was returned as Max squeezed her tightly.
She had to fight the urge to not let go, then fight the urge to rush after her, the urge to plant herself in front of the jeep and refuse to move, to refuse to let her go.
In the end, she did none of that. Simply sat in the doorway as she heard the engine turn over, the sound of the wheels overturning rocks and earth as the scent of the exhaust filled the air.
And the feeling of every second she was further away from Max, who would spend every single second waiting for her to return.
…She promised after all.