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i've been seeing ghosts again by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
22 Jun 2026
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Following the move to Ottawa, Ilya is struggling to keep his head above water. The Centaurs seem incapable of winning, his house is still half-unpacked at best, and Shane is two hours away in Montreal. After months of struggling alone, Ilya unexpectedly shows up at the Hollanders’ house one night, terrified of his own thoughts.
In the months that follow, Ilya hits low after low, struggling with his newly-diagnosed depression. David and Yuna do their best to be there for him while distance is still keeping Shane and Ilya apart.
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Ten years ago, Cas told Dean he loved him before being taken by the Empty. Dean never moved past it, isolating himself from everyone and trying to find a way to bring Cas back. Ten years to the day, and he’s ready to try one last ritual.
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deep breath, exhale by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
15 Mar 2026
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Shane looked at Ilya carefully. At the curled-up posture, at eyes that were too shiny to hide the fact he’d been crying. Bare toes in the damp grass, jaw clenched like he couldn’t relax even with the nicotine.
“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked, softly.
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forgive my northern attitude (i was raised on little light) by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
13 Mar 2026
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“You left your phone,” Shane said, pointing at the device where Ilya had left it. It was still sitting on the table, like an innocent witness to the proceedings.
“Sorry?” Ilya said, a crease deepening between his eyes as he stared at Shane in bewilderment. “Shane, I do not understand.”
“You’ve barely made it out of bed the last few days. I come home and you’re gone and your phone is here. What was I supposed to think?!”
Ilya stared at him, and then his eyes narrowed. Hardened into something that promised a summer storm.
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we both love the smoke in our lungs by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
24 Feb 2026
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There was a bruise darkening under Rozanov’s right eye.
Shane reached across and ran a finger over the puffy swell of it, gentle and careful, pulling away immediately when Rozanov winced.
“I would say sorry you got punched, but you were being an asshole out there.”
Ilya pulled his face out of reach of Shane’s searching fingers and shrugged. Like he got punched all the time and it was no big deal.
They were collapsed across each other on the bed, half-under the covers, half-exposed to the slightly too stuffy room. Rozanov’s sweat-damp curls were hanging in messy disarray across his forehead, lips still slightly swollen and red. He looked best like this, Shane decided vaguely, watching the minute twitch of Rozanov’s jaw, the long line of his throat. Bruised up and sweaty, limbs loose and sprawled out on the bed like it belonged to him.
“I got a punch in also,” Rozanov mused, blinking up at the popcorn ceiling. “So is fine.”
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love you like that by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
19 Feb 2026
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Warm hands suddenly encased his, pulling them away from his shirt collar and back down onto the table. Shane risked a glance at Ilya and saw only concern and confusion on his face, but he couldn’t keep looking at him directly, couldn’t look him in the eye.
Couldn’t let Ilya see him lose it like this, in public, all because the shirt felt wrong. Because it felt too much like being five and ripping hand-knitted jumpers from his body because they hurt. Like needing seams in his socks to sit a certain way. Like a childhood spent tearfully pulling clothes off his body until his parents figured out what fabrics he could tolerate. It felt like being seven and unable to explain to teachers why the other children didn’t like him, why he hid under the tables when the classroom was too noisy.
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such a lovable lamb to me by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
16 Feb 2026
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Ilya swallowed and Shane traced the movement with his little finger. Ilya’s skin was so warm, already tanned from only a few days at the cottage. Like it had just been waiting for an excuse to turn golden.
“Even if I am not a nice man?” he asked.
The self-doubt was almost painful to look at. This was what he had asked for, the morning of Ilya’s arrival at the cottage, but now he had it Shane wasn’t sure how to deal with such open honesty. With such vulnerability.
Shane looked at him for a long moment, tracing his hand along Ilya’s jaw until they came to rest under his chin. The barest hint of stubble there was rough against the pads of his fingers.
“I don’t want you to be some nice guy from Montreal,” he whispered. “I want you to be you. Ok?”
Ilya finally met his gaze, allowed Shane to lift his head up so he had no choice but to look at him. Then he nodded, a small movement. A gesture to appease Shane, to end the conversation that they were both struggling with.
Shane kissed the tip of his nose.
They’d always found touch easier than words.
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say I won’t return (but I never learn) by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
14 Feb 2026
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Ilya made a vague gesture with his hand.
“Is just family,” he reassured him with forced levity. “You know how it is.”
“Right,” Hollander said awkwardly.
He didn’t know and they both knew it. Hollander and his perfect family, parents who attended all his games and hugged him after even if he lost. Parents who had probably never accused him of being a disappointment to Canada if he missed a pass. Who loved him and weren’t ashamed to show it. Who didn’t look at him and only see a bank account.
A family that didn’t feel like a mouth to feed.
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we’ll live in spaces between the walls by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
07 Feb 2026
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“You want to talk about it?” Hollander asked, and Ilya could feel the vibrations of his voice in his chest.
“No,” Ilya said.
Because he was worried that if he opened his mouth now, he’d never stop spilling fears, would never stop haemorrhaging secrets like they couldn’t turn to ammunition in Hollander’s hands if he chose to turn them on him. He’d talk and cry and tell Hollander all of it, the whole sorry lot, and then there would be no way to reclaim what he had given.
It wasn’t worth the risk.
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there wouldn’t be a reason why we would even have to say goodbye by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
04 Feb 2026
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Then Ilya came back and kissed him hard on the doorstep, like the week looming ahead wasn’t breaking both of them into millions of pieces the way it did each and every time. He tasted like too-sweet coffee, so real, so familiar, under Shane’s lips and hands.
“Have a good flight,” Shane muttered against the soft skin beside Ilya’s mouth. “Text me.”
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you don’t see it (your mind’s polluted) by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
31 Jan 2026
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Ilya clung to Shane like he was drowning, felt tears finally fall against the soft cotton of Shane’s sweatshirt. Tried to allow himself the comfort that Shane was offering, tried to let the Shane’s familiar scent lull him back to an evener keel again. Tried to let the soothing words being whispered in his ears calm him.
He hated that it wasn’t enough. That Shane could read every book on the subject he could get his hands on, could talk to him, could listen to him, could do all he possibly could to help him through each bad patch. That he could be patient and tolerant and optimistic and try so fucking hard to get things right. Because it wasn’t enough to fix whatever was fucked up in his brain.
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love you like oxygen by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
25 Jan 2026
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It had become real to him, somewhere between sleep and dreaming, that he could have this now.
He could fall asleep in the warm arms of the man he loved, could kiss him outside on the lawn or at a barbeque with his parents. He could listen to Ilya’s heartbeat, strong and steady against his ear as they clung to one another in relief and joy in the aftermath just outside the door of the cottage. They could wake up together for the next two weeks, slow and easy. No last-minute practices, no cross-country flights to catch.
They could just.
Be.
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lost color in my face by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
11 Jan 2026
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“Do not worry,” Ilya breathed against his lips.
As if Shane had a choice in the matter. As if worry hadn’t kept Shane awake past midnight for weeks, as if he wasn’t scared to leave the house for too long in case Ilya did something stupid in his absence. He’d promised he wouldn’t. Several times over. Shane wanted to believe him, he did, but the worse Ilya’s depression got the more hollow the promise felt.
“I always worry about you,” Shane said softly, pushing Ilya’s hair back from his forehead.
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i could lay and just look in your eyes by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
09 Jan 2026
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But then Hollander was running warm hands over his shoulders, his waist, pulling him in close for one last kiss, and Ilya closed his eyes tightly and let himself pretend.
Even if only for a moment.
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give peace a chance by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
08 Jan 2026
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While Shane and Yuna have a heart-to-heart outside, David and Ilya make lunch and some important conversations are had.
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keep this love in a photograph by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
06 Jan 2026
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“And then this is Shane on his first day of school,” Yuna said, whipping out another photo with a flourish. “He was so nervous, do you remember, honey? We had to hold your hand all the way up to the classroom door.”
Ilya gazed at the photo, not bothering to conceal his obvious delight.
It struck Shane suddenly that he’d never seen any photos of Ilya as a child. Had never seen what he had worn on his first day of school, never seen the gap-toothed primary school days. He wondered if his hair had used to be lighter. If his mother had held his hand tight on his first day at school as well.
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keep closing my eyes but i can't block you out by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
04 Jan 2026
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Shane folds his clothes before sex and Ilya is so endeared by it.
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hand to mouth (i'm getting by) by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
04 Jan 2026
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The box lay on the table between them and Ilya scowled at it.
Antidepressants.
He could practically hear his father scoffing from beyond the grave.
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don't feed it (it will come back) by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
03 Jan 2026
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“Are you sure you don’t want me to stay?” he asked.
“I will not fuck you tonight, Hollander,” Ilya bit out. “Get out.”
Hollander blinked down at him owlishly and why wasn’t he leaving? Ilya extracted a hand from under the covers and gestured half-heartedly towards the door.
“Not for…that,” Hollander said, shaking his head. “I could just stay here.”
Ilya swallowed hard and pictured it. Curling up against Hollander’s chest, resting his head against warm skin. Letting Hollander run his hands through his hair. The soft light from the lamp turning Hollander’s eyes molten, the comforting solidness of him.
But they couldn’t. It just wasn’t what they did.
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feels like a vow (we’ll both uphold somehow) by Pale_Blue
Fandoms: Supernatural (TV 2005)
10 Dec 2025
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“I’m happy,” Deam whispered, the words lingering between them, caught between lips and teeth and shared air. “I’ve never been happier.”
Cas swallowed, his hand hot on Dean’s knee. He was so close Dean could count his eyelashes, could kiss him again and again and again until Cas finally believed what he was saying.
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